﻿1
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<i>Previously on</i> Young Sheldon...

2
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Hi, Pastor Jeff, can you
come over right now?

3
00:00:05,560 --> 00:00:07,680
I need you to save someone's soul.

4
00:00:07,730 --> 00:00:09,350
- JEFF: Amen.
- (MARY GASPS)

5
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In your face, Catholics.

6
00:00:11,130 --> 00:00:13,960
I baptize you in the name of the Father

7
00:00:14,014 --> 00:00:15,750
and the Son

8
00:00:15,800 --> 00:00:17,900
and the Holy Spirit, amen.

9
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- Amen.
- MANDY: <i>You know, I'm not a lawyer,</i>

10
00:00:19,810 --> 00:00:20,839
but you could make the argument

11
00:00:20,840 --> 00:00:22,930
that my child was kidnapped twice.

12
00:00:22,980 --> 00:00:25,030
Well, there have to be consequences.

13
00:00:25,080 --> 00:00:26,799
How do you feel about
coming down to City Hall

14
00:00:26,800 --> 00:00:28,319
to witness me and Georgie get married?

15
00:00:28,320 --> 00:00:29,530
What about your parents?

16
00:00:29,580 --> 00:00:31,370
We're really not gonna invite our folks?

17
00:00:31,420 --> 00:00:34,210
A spite wedding. I had one of those.

18
00:00:34,260 --> 00:00:35,800
Let me get my purse.

19
00:00:39,740 --> 00:00:41,550
GEORGE JR.: Hey, little girl.

20
00:00:41,600 --> 00:00:43,920
In a few minutes, you're
gonna be legitimate.

21
00:00:43,970 --> 00:00:45,920
You saying she's illegitimate?

22
00:00:45,970 --> 00:00:48,660
Not me, just, you know, everybody.

23
00:00:48,716 --> 00:00:50,530
If you want to smack him,
I'll hold the baby.

24
00:00:50,580 --> 00:00:51,920
Nah, it's okay.

25
00:00:52,740 --> 00:00:54,060
Well, just in case.

26
00:00:54,110 --> 00:00:55,740
- (LAUGHS)
- MARY: Wait!

27
00:00:56,340 --> 00:00:58,360
- Wait!
- What are they doing here?

28
00:00:59,120 --> 00:01:01,140
MEEMAW: I told them,
and you can't smack me

29
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'cause I'm holding the baby.

30
00:01:03,260 --> 00:01:06,240
- Did we miss it?
- No, we're still waiting.

31
00:01:06,290 --> 00:01:07,810
I told you we didn't need to run.

32
00:01:08,980 --> 00:01:10,970
I know you're mad at me, and I am sorry,

33
00:01:11,010 --> 00:01:12,840
but can we please be a
part of this wedding?

34
00:01:12,890 --> 00:01:14,810
Yes, please. I only have one brother.

35
00:01:14,860 --> 00:01:16,900
- What about Sheldon?
- Yeah.

36
00:01:18,245 --> 00:01:19,250
Fine.

37
00:01:19,300 --> 00:01:21,620
- (EXHALES): Oh.
- Cooper-McAllister?

38
00:01:21,670 --> 00:01:23,030
- Right here.
- You're up.

39
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AUDREY: Wait!

40
00:01:25,085 --> 00:01:26,240
Wait.

41
00:01:29,540 --> 00:01:30,600
Wasn't me.

42
00:01:30,650 --> 00:01:32,500
It was me. I called your dad.

43
00:01:33,280 --> 00:01:34,450
Oh, that's a long hallway.

44
00:01:34,500 --> 00:01:36,630
- And those steps in front?
- Brutal.

45
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AUDREY: Please, let us be part of this.

46
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What do you think?

47
00:01:42,020 --> 00:01:44,010
Oh, I think we're thinking
the same thing.

48
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You can stay.

49
00:01:45,830 --> 00:01:47,180
(SIGHS)

50
00:01:47,232 --> 00:01:49,030
- Come on.
- Are you gonna be okay?

51
00:01:49,080 --> 00:01:51,270
Yeah, yeah. Maybe.

52
00:01:55,100 --> 00:01:56,116
Aww.

53
00:01:56,750 --> 00:01:57,790
What's wrong?

54
00:01:57,840 --> 00:01:59,870
No, it's just, I wanted to
walk you down the aisle,

55
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but there's no aisle.

56
00:02:01,380 --> 00:02:02,960
Um, hang on.

57
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(SOFTLY): Come on.

58
00:02:09,940 --> 00:02:11,740
♪ ♪

59
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- Thank you.
- Take care of my little girl.

60
00:02:16,220 --> 00:02:18,290
- Yes, sir.
- All right.

61
00:02:21,300 --> 00:02:23,660
All right. Let's get started.

62
00:02:23,680 --> 00:02:26,520
Could you show a little
respect and stand up?

63
00:02:26,570 --> 00:02:28,590
One of those.

64
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George Marshall Cooper Jr.,

65
00:02:32,800 --> 00:02:35,114
do you take Amanda Elizabeth McAllister

66
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to be your lawfully wedded wife?

67
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I do.

68
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LYNDON: Amanda Elizabeth McAllister,

69
00:02:41,050 --> 00:02:42,730
do you take George Marshall Cooper Jr.

70
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to be your lawfully wedded husband?

71
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I do.

72
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LYNDON: By the power vested in me

73
00:02:48,640 --> 00:02:49,950
by the great state of Texas,

74
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I now pronounce you husband and wife.

75
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- (LAUGHS)
- You may kiss the bride.

76
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(APPLAUSE)

77
00:02:56,230 --> 00:02:58,050
You can sit down now.

78
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♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪

79
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♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪

80
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♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪

81
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♪ I am a mighty little man ♪

82
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♪ <i>I am a mighty little man.</i> ♪

83
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- Synced & corrected by<font color="#E83286"> MementMori </font>-
-- <font color="#138CE9">www.addic7ed.com</font> --

84
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(MUSIC PLAYING SOFTLY)

85
00:03:22,540 --> 00:03:24,650
I can't believe they
gave us the train car.

86
00:03:24,700 --> 00:03:27,320
Well, my dad slipped the
conductor five bucks.

87
00:03:27,370 --> 00:03:28,900
- Classy.
- So, what are you thinking?

88
00:03:28,920 --> 00:03:30,820
Couple buckets of
spaghetti for the table?

89
00:03:30,878 --> 00:03:34,010
Sure. Y-Yeah... and we're
gonna split the tab.

90
00:03:34,060 --> 00:03:35,200
It's all right, I got it.

91
00:03:35,257 --> 00:03:36,410
Uh, Jim, come on.

92
00:03:36,460 --> 00:03:38,120
We didn't pay for a wedding,

93
00:03:38,150 --> 00:03:39,790
we can spring for some spaghetti.

94
00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:42,290
- I-In a bucket.
- We know.

95
00:03:42,340 --> 00:03:44,130
I-I'm happy to chip in.

96
00:03:44,180 --> 00:03:46,340
No, no. No, this is between me and him.

97
00:03:46,390 --> 00:03:49,260
- And we're splitting it.
- Dad, we're poor. Let him pay.

98
00:03:49,310 --> 00:03:50,530
We are not poor.

99
00:03:50,580 --> 00:03:52,230
Wouldn't matter either way.

100
00:03:52,280 --> 00:03:54,010
But we're not.

101
00:03:54,067 --> 00:03:57,640
- (GLASS CLINKING)
- (CLEARS THROAT)

102
00:03:57,690 --> 00:04:00,200
I would like to propose a toast...

103
00:04:01,160 --> 00:04:03,744
... to Mandy and Georgie.

104
00:04:04,960 --> 00:04:08,210
Your relationship started
out with lies and deceit,

105
00:04:08,260 --> 00:04:10,450
which usually happens
later on in marriage.

106
00:04:10,500 --> 00:04:11,620
Where is this going?

107
00:04:11,670 --> 00:04:16,650
But you two got it out of
the way right up front.

108
00:04:16,700 --> 00:04:19,051
So I think the odds are in your favor...

109
00:04:19,900 --> 00:04:24,850
... for having a lifetime
of love and happiness.

110
00:04:24,900 --> 00:04:28,340
To Mandy and Georgie...

111
00:04:30,060 --> 00:04:31,490
... and CeeCee.

112
00:04:34,560 --> 00:04:36,170
Way to bring it home, baby.

113
00:04:36,220 --> 00:04:37,680
I can do heartfelt.

114
00:04:38,400 --> 00:04:40,430
- Hello.
- Oh, good, you're here.

115
00:04:40,470 --> 00:04:42,610
Oh, thank you for bringing
him, Dr. Linkletter.

116
00:04:42,660 --> 00:04:44,180
Well, you hungry? Have a seat.

117
00:04:44,230 --> 00:04:46,790
Well, I do have a half can of
tuna waiting for me at home,

118
00:04:46,840 --> 00:04:48,860
but what the hay?

119
00:04:49,970 --> 00:04:52,240
So, you and my brother got
married and no one invited me?

120
00:04:52,290 --> 00:04:54,490
Sorry, it was kind of
a last-minute thing.

121
00:04:54,540 --> 00:04:55,600
No, I was thanking you.

122
00:04:55,650 --> 00:04:57,798
I hope that, someday, my sister
won't invite me to her wedding.

123
00:04:57,799 --> 00:04:59,190
- I won't.
- Thank you.

124
00:04:59,240 --> 00:05:00,830
Here we are.

125
00:05:00,880 --> 00:05:03,000
Grab a shovel and dig in.

126
00:05:05,580 --> 00:05:06,630
There you go.

127
00:05:07,920 --> 00:05:10,310
I spent the summer in Italy once.

128
00:05:10,360 --> 00:05:11,420
Bringing back memories?

129
00:05:12,200 --> 00:05:13,330
No.

130
00:05:13,380 --> 00:05:14,970
(GLASS CLINKING)

131
00:05:16,440 --> 00:05:19,120
Amanda, Georgie,

132
00:05:19,170 --> 00:05:22,910
since your father and I didn't get
to give you a proper wedding,

133
00:05:22,960 --> 00:05:24,908
we'd like to pay for a honeymoon.

134
00:05:24,910 --> 00:05:26,790
(GASPS) Wow, really?

135
00:05:26,840 --> 00:05:28,161
Should we offer to split... ?

136
00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:31,470
Mr. McAllister, really appreciate it,

137
00:05:31,520 --> 00:05:33,280
but that's not necessary.

138
00:05:33,330 --> 00:05:36,170
First of all, no more of this
"Mr. McAllister" stuff, okay?

139
00:05:36,220 --> 00:05:38,510
- It's Jim.
- Thank you, Jim.

140
00:05:38,560 --> 00:05:40,630
Uh, very kind, Jim.

141
00:05:40,680 --> 00:05:42,710
This feels weird, Jim.

142
00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:44,640
So, where are we going?

143
00:05:44,690 --> 00:05:45,750
What would you say

144
00:05:45,800 --> 00:05:49,510
to an all-expenses-paid
weekend at Dollywood?

145
00:05:49,560 --> 00:05:50,809
- Shut up.
- MANDY: Oh, my God.

146
00:05:50,810 --> 00:05:52,880
- Thank you.
- That's amazing.

147
00:05:52,930 --> 00:05:54,313
Oh, I'm definitely getting married.

148
00:05:54,314 --> 00:05:55,520
And I won't be going.

149
00:05:55,570 --> 00:05:57,090
Oh, and I can watch the baby.

150
00:05:57,140 --> 00:06:00,230
Or me, the one who just
paid for your honeymoon.

151
00:06:00,280 --> 00:06:02,239
You two are on probation.
I don't want to come home

152
00:06:02,240 --> 00:06:04,190
and find out there was an exorcism.

153
00:06:04,240 --> 00:06:07,270
- Connie, will you do it?
- I would love to.

154
00:06:07,320 --> 00:06:09,530
Wait a minute, it's my house.
Don't I have a say?

155
00:06:09,580 --> 00:06:10,770
No.

156
00:06:12,020 --> 00:06:13,570
I don't have a say.

157
00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:18,050
I got to go open up the gambling room.

158
00:06:18,100 --> 00:06:19,930
Can you watch her for about an hour?

159
00:06:19,960 --> 00:06:22,500
I just had coffee and
a bowl of Raisin Bran.

160
00:06:22,550 --> 00:06:24,950
Next hour is spoken for.

161
00:06:25,000 --> 00:06:27,170
You could've just said no.

162
00:06:27,220 --> 00:06:29,330
I'm trying to keep the romance alive.

163
00:06:32,310 --> 00:06:33,889
Hey, why don't we look
around for wedding rings

164
00:06:33,890 --> 00:06:35,290
- in Tennessee?
- Hmm.

165
00:06:35,340 --> 00:06:37,060
Maybe they sell them at Dollywood.

166
00:06:37,900 --> 00:06:40,270
If it's all the same, I'd rather
not get my wedding ring

167
00:06:40,320 --> 00:06:41,980
at the same place they sell corn dogs.

168
00:06:42,520 --> 00:06:44,050
Oh, corn dogs.

169
00:06:44,100 --> 00:06:46,073
- We're definitely getting corn dogs.
- (LAUGHS)

170
00:06:47,200 --> 00:06:49,680
You know, through all the rush,
we didn't really talk about it,

171
00:06:49,710 --> 00:06:51,690
but are you gonna take my name?

172
00:06:53,200 --> 00:06:54,580
Is it important to you?

173
00:06:54,630 --> 00:06:57,870
I don't know, I'd kind of like
people to know we're a family.

174
00:06:57,920 --> 00:06:59,070
You know, the Coopers,

175
00:06:59,120 --> 00:07:00,990
Georgie and Mandy Cooper.
(LAUGHS SOFTLY)

176
00:07:01,046 --> 00:07:02,419
I'd go to a barbecue at their house.

177
00:07:02,420 --> 00:07:03,720
(BOTH CHUCKLE)

178
00:07:03,770 --> 00:07:05,160
Well, why don't you take my name?

179
00:07:05,210 --> 00:07:07,250
I'm trying to have a
serious conversation,

180
00:07:07,280 --> 00:07:08,390
and you're making jokes.

181
00:07:08,440 --> 00:07:09,760
Why is it a joke?

182
00:07:09,810 --> 00:07:11,970
Maybe that'd fly in New York City,

183
00:07:11,990 --> 00:07:14,101
but in Texas, I'd get my ass kicked.

184
00:07:14,120 --> 00:07:15,800
Maybe we should move to New York City.

185
00:07:15,850 --> 00:07:18,220
Okay, there's just some things
you don't joke about.

186
00:07:19,190 --> 00:07:22,410
And the thing you need to
know about slot machines

187
00:07:22,460 --> 00:07:27,520
is that they provide the
house with a 17% edge.

188
00:07:27,570 --> 00:07:28,990
And that...

189
00:07:30,020 --> 00:07:33,610
is a whole lot of edge for
Meemaw and your daddy.

190
00:07:35,500 --> 00:07:37,000
Huh?

191
00:07:38,710 --> 00:07:40,200
Ooh, that ain't good.

192
00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:46,000
- Excuse me.
- I don't work here!

193
00:07:50,300 --> 00:07:51,580
(SIREN WHOOPS)

194
00:07:52,930 --> 00:07:55,670
OFFICER (OVER P.A.): Connie
Tucker? Please stop running.

195
00:07:55,720 --> 00:07:58,395
(SIREN WAILING)

196
00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:04,230
GILROY: (GASPS)

197
00:08:04,280 --> 00:08:07,710
Peekaboo. Oh, yeah,
that's funny. (GASPS)

198
00:08:07,760 --> 00:08:09,480
Peekaboo.

199
00:08:09,531 --> 00:08:10,532
Hey.

200
00:08:11,240 --> 00:08:12,310
Took you long enough.

201
00:08:12,367 --> 00:08:14,170
Yeah, I'm old. I had to
go to the bathroom.

202
00:08:14,220 --> 00:08:16,730
Why are you handcuffed?
Why is she handcuffed?

203
00:08:16,780 --> 00:08:19,370
- She's a flight risk.
- What is she talking about?

204
00:08:19,420 --> 00:08:21,900
I was just taking the baby for a walk,

205
00:08:21,950 --> 00:08:23,500
and Cagney and Lacey here

206
00:08:23,530 --> 00:08:26,250
decided that I was evading arrest.

207
00:08:26,300 --> 00:08:28,810
Oh, Connie. H-How much is bail?

208
00:08:28,860 --> 00:08:30,050
Won't know till Monday.

209
00:08:30,100 --> 00:08:31,920
- What?
- Judge left town for the weekend.

210
00:08:31,970 --> 00:08:33,380
Well, get him back.

211
00:08:33,430 --> 00:08:34,790
Can't. Gone fishing.

212
00:08:34,848 --> 00:08:36,850
Beautiful day for it. Where'd he go?

213
00:08:36,900 --> 00:08:38,820
- Dale.
- Right.

214
00:08:38,870 --> 00:08:41,060
You mean I got to sit here till Monday?

215
00:08:41,110 --> 00:08:42,730
Well, you'll be back in a cell.

216
00:08:42,750 --> 00:08:44,800
Where all the bad people go.

217
00:08:44,858 --> 00:08:45,860
(COOS)

218
00:08:45,910 --> 00:08:47,170
Oh, my God.

219
00:08:47,220 --> 00:08:50,000
Dale, take the baby home.

220
00:08:50,050 --> 00:08:52,240
Me? Why don't you call Mary?

221
00:08:52,290 --> 00:08:54,870
The last thing I want is for
her to know about this.

222
00:08:54,920 --> 00:08:56,240
I'll watch the baby if you like.

223
00:08:56,290 --> 00:08:58,210
There you go, problem solved.

224
00:08:58,260 --> 00:09:01,210
No. Take the baby.

225
00:09:01,260 --> 00:09:02,570
(GROANS)

226
00:09:03,480 --> 00:09:05,030
Yeah.

227
00:09:06,140 --> 00:09:07,964
Well, is there anything I can bring you?

228
00:09:07,980 --> 00:09:10,500
Yeah, a cake with a file in it.

229
00:09:10,550 --> 00:09:12,160
(LAUGHS): Good one.

230
00:09:12,219 --> 00:09:13,460
DALE: Thank you, Officer.

231
00:09:14,580 --> 00:09:17,430
Can I give the flight
risk a kiss goodbye?

232
00:09:17,480 --> 00:09:18,840
That's up to her.

233
00:09:18,890 --> 00:09:21,080
- I'm good.
- She's good.

234
00:09:21,780 --> 00:09:23,430
Okay, CeeCee, here we go.

235
00:09:25,330 --> 00:09:26,358
Bye, baby.

236
00:09:26,370 --> 00:09:28,720
Next rest stop, let's call
and check on CeeCee.

237
00:09:28,770 --> 00:09:31,480
She's fine. She's with my meemaw.

238
00:09:32,420 --> 00:09:34,410
Yeah, you're right,
I'm worrying for nothing.

239
00:09:34,460 --> 00:09:36,880
All right, let's get you to your cell.

240
00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:42,630
So, that beautiful little girl
is your granddaughter?

241
00:09:42,680 --> 00:09:44,420
Great-granddaughter.

242
00:09:44,470 --> 00:09:46,370
I never locked up a
great-grandma before.

243
00:09:46,420 --> 00:09:49,830
Well, isn't this your lucky day?

244
00:09:49,880 --> 00:09:51,200
(PHONE RINGING)

245
00:09:53,060 --> 00:09:54,580
Sheldon, phone.

246
00:09:55,720 --> 00:09:58,030
187 IQ and I'm a receptionist.

247
00:09:58,080 --> 00:09:59,650
(SNIFFLES)

248
00:09:59,700 --> 00:10:01,170
Cooper residence.

249
00:10:01,220 --> 00:10:03,130
Hello, Mr. Ballard.

250
00:10:03,180 --> 00:10:05,720
He's here. May I tell him
what this is concerning?

251
00:10:06,560 --> 00:10:08,510
I may not? Very well.

252
00:10:08,560 --> 00:10:09,810
Dad, it's Mr. Ballard.

253
00:10:09,860 --> 00:10:11,350
I'll pick it up in here.

254
00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:13,020
Which you could've done to begin with.

255
00:10:14,660 --> 00:10:16,220
Hey, Dale, what's up?

256
00:10:17,950 --> 00:10:18,990
You're kidding.

257
00:10:19,040 --> 00:10:20,980
- Till Monday?
- What's going on?

258
00:10:21,030 --> 00:10:22,070
Shh!

259
00:10:22,120 --> 00:10:23,740
Well, is there anything I can do?

260
00:10:23,790 --> 00:10:25,610
Yeah, I know a couple lawyers.

261
00:10:25,667 --> 00:10:28,200
- Who needs a lawyer?
- Meemaw's in jail.

262
00:10:28,250 --> 00:10:29,490
Hang up.

263
00:10:32,690 --> 00:10:34,160
What's she in jail for?

264
00:10:34,217 --> 00:10:36,470
I'm not sure. Some kind
of room got shut down.

265
00:10:36,520 --> 00:10:38,750
- Oh, the gambling room.
- What?

266
00:10:38,805 --> 00:10:40,265
Yeah, in the back of the laundromat.

267
00:10:40,266 --> 00:10:41,750
Isn't that illegal?

268
00:10:41,808 --> 00:10:44,370
Yeah, that's why she's in jail.

269
00:10:44,420 --> 00:10:46,450
She tried to run?

270
00:10:46,500 --> 00:10:48,550
(CHUCKLES) Oh, that...

271
00:10:48,580 --> 00:10:50,320
Oh, that makes me so happy.

272
00:10:50,370 --> 00:10:54,060
♪ Met her on the mountain ♪

273
00:10:54,110 --> 00:10:56,990
♪ There I took her life ♪

274
00:10:58,510 --> 00:11:01,120
♪ Met her on the mountain ♪

275
00:11:01,950 --> 00:11:04,414
- (FUSSING)
- ♪ Stabbed her with my knife. ♪

276
00:11:04,420 --> 00:11:05,500
(CRYING)

277
00:11:06,260 --> 00:11:08,210
Yeah, it's kind of a sad one.

278
00:11:08,260 --> 00:11:10,740
Yeah. You'll like this one.

279
00:11:12,930 --> 00:11:15,780
♪ Delia, oh, Delia ♪

280
00:11:16,700 --> 00:11:19,450
♪ Delia all my life ♪

281
00:11:20,160 --> 00:11:23,490
♪ If I hadn't shot poor Delia. ♪

282
00:11:25,780 --> 00:11:27,380
Here you go. This is for you.

283
00:11:30,240 --> 00:11:32,860
♪ Hey, yeah, baby ♪

284
00:11:34,700 --> 00:11:36,000
♪ Shake it on down. ♪

285
00:11:36,050 --> 00:11:37,900
- (COOING)
- That's the one.

286
00:11:37,950 --> 00:11:39,480
- That's the one.
- (DOORBELL RINGS)

287
00:11:41,540 --> 00:11:42,860
We got company.

288
00:11:44,204 --> 00:11:47,040
- Hey, Mare.
- George told me about the arrest.

289
00:11:47,090 --> 00:11:49,910
Oh. Yeah. Boy, I know
how to pick 'em, huh?

290
00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:51,220
Is she okay?

291
00:11:51,270 --> 00:11:53,350
Oh, yeah, she's a tough old bird.

292
00:11:53,400 --> 00:11:55,860
Well, let me take the
baby off your hands

293
00:11:55,880 --> 00:11:56,950
till the kids come back.

294
00:11:57,720 --> 00:12:00,720
Well, but we're having such a good time.

295
00:12:00,770 --> 00:12:02,760
- Dale.
- She likes me.

296
00:12:02,810 --> 00:12:03,960
Dale.

297
00:12:04,010 --> 00:12:05,150
(SIGHS)

298
00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:06,810
Oh. Fine.

299
00:12:06,860 --> 00:12:09,280
You get the baby, I'll grab her Binky.

300
00:12:10,400 --> 00:12:12,300
You know, she really does like me.

301
00:12:13,600 --> 00:12:14,680
So, here's a question.

302
00:12:14,734 --> 00:12:16,110
What?

303
00:12:16,160 --> 00:12:18,270
You think CeeCee's
gonna be an only child?

304
00:12:19,840 --> 00:12:22,350
I don't know. For a while she is. Why?

305
00:12:23,170 --> 00:12:25,310
Well, since we're man and wife now,

306
00:12:25,350 --> 00:12:26,600
we got to make plans.

307
00:12:26,650 --> 00:12:29,290
I'm almost back in my old
jeans. This can wait.

308
00:12:29,340 --> 00:12:32,310
Well, I'm just saying, I liked
having a brother and sister.

309
00:12:32,360 --> 00:12:33,660
Don't you like having a brother?

310
00:12:33,710 --> 00:12:35,090
Eh.

311
00:12:35,140 --> 00:12:37,090
So, y'all didn't get along?

312
00:12:37,140 --> 00:12:39,259
I picked on him. I made him cry a lot.

313
00:12:39,940 --> 00:12:41,450
That's what I did with Sheldon.

314
00:12:41,500 --> 00:12:42,970
Don't you want CeeCee to have that?

315
00:12:43,020 --> 00:12:46,260
Just so you know, my plans include
more than making babies

316
00:12:46,310 --> 00:12:47,610
so they can pick on each other.

317
00:12:47,640 --> 00:12:50,340
- I want a career.
- I support that.

318
00:12:51,620 --> 00:12:53,130
And maybe go back to school.

319
00:12:54,660 --> 00:12:56,650
Curveball, but okay.

320
00:12:58,020 --> 00:12:59,359
I don't have to go back to school, do I?

321
00:12:59,360 --> 00:13:00,620
Oh, no, sweetheart.

322
00:13:00,670 --> 00:13:02,130
Thank you.

323
00:13:03,040 --> 00:13:04,130
(DOORBELL RINGS)

324
00:13:06,340 --> 00:13:08,690
Hey there. Alice, isn't it?

325
00:13:08,740 --> 00:13:11,070
- Audrey.
- Right.

326
00:13:11,120 --> 00:13:12,460
What can I do for you, Audrey?

327
00:13:12,510 --> 00:13:14,330
I came to visit my granddaughter.

328
00:13:14,380 --> 00:13:16,740
- Not here.
- Where is she?

329
00:13:16,796 --> 00:13:19,470
Well, as they say in Canada,

330
00:13:19,520 --> 00:13:21,520
she's "oot and aboot."

331
00:13:24,060 --> 00:13:26,650
So, if I'm to understand correctly,

332
00:13:26,700 --> 00:13:29,050
our meemaw's been running
a criminal enterprise.

333
00:13:29,100 --> 00:13:30,110
Cool, huh?

334
00:13:30,160 --> 00:13:31,720
No, it is most certainly not cool.

335
00:13:31,770 --> 00:13:34,650
On the one hand, people need
to pay for their crimes.

336
00:13:34,700 --> 00:13:36,310
On the other, if Meemaw's in prison,

337
00:13:36,330 --> 00:13:38,443
who's gonna smell like Bengay
and kiss me on the head?

338
00:13:38,444 --> 00:13:41,330
She's an old lady, they're not
gonna lock her up forever.

339
00:13:41,380 --> 00:13:43,330
I sure hope not.

340
00:13:44,650 --> 00:13:47,035
Are there any other family secrets
that I don't know about?

341
00:13:47,036 --> 00:13:50,700
Um... actually, yes.

342
00:13:50,750 --> 00:13:51,800
Tell me.

343
00:13:51,850 --> 00:13:54,620
- No, you couldn't handle it.
- Now I have to know.

344
00:13:55,290 --> 00:13:56,330
Okay.

345
00:13:56,360 --> 00:13:58,179
You ever wonder why Mom
made that prayer garden

346
00:13:58,180 --> 00:14:00,210
- in the back yard?
- To pray.

347
00:14:00,260 --> 00:14:02,150
You're so naive.

348
00:14:02,200 --> 00:14:04,080
(WHISPERS): There's a
dead body under there.

349
00:14:04,130 --> 00:14:05,350
Whose?

350
00:14:05,400 --> 00:14:07,020
I've already said too much.

351
00:14:07,070 --> 00:14:08,840
<i>(DOORBELL RINGS)</i>

352
00:14:10,070 --> 00:14:11,380
Hey, Audrey.

353
00:14:11,434 --> 00:14:13,970
- Where's Mary?
- She's, uh...

354
00:14:14,020 --> 00:14:15,300
(CLEARS THROAT) Mare!

355
00:14:16,480 --> 00:14:17,860
Oh.

356
00:14:17,910 --> 00:14:19,930
- Hi.
- Why do you have the baby?

357
00:14:19,980 --> 00:14:21,600
Um...

358
00:14:21,650 --> 00:14:23,530
It's kind of a long story.

359
00:14:23,580 --> 00:14:25,850
Why do you have the baby?

360
00:14:26,990 --> 00:14:29,570
My mother was arrested, she's in jail.

361
00:14:29,620 --> 00:14:33,150
I can't get a straight answer
from anybody in this family.

362
00:14:37,600 --> 00:14:39,490
A gambling room?

363
00:14:39,540 --> 00:14:40,720
Yes.

364
00:14:40,770 --> 00:14:43,390
And she'd been bribing the authorities?

365
00:14:43,440 --> 00:14:45,150
I wouldn't use that word,

366
00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:47,050
but there were...

367
00:14:47,100 --> 00:14:50,470
donations made to the authorities.

368
00:14:50,520 --> 00:14:51,880
And Georgie worked there?

369
00:14:51,930 --> 00:14:54,570
Well, he also runs the laundromat.

370
00:14:54,620 --> 00:14:55,770
Very legitimate.

371
00:14:55,820 --> 00:14:57,070
For money laundering.

372
00:14:57,120 --> 00:14:58,910
And regular laundering.

373
00:14:58,960 --> 00:15:00,540
(SOFTLY): I can't believe this.

374
00:15:00,590 --> 00:15:04,010
What kind of a family has
my daughter married into?

375
00:15:04,060 --> 00:15:07,520
To be clear, I did not
condone any of this.

376
00:15:07,570 --> 00:15:10,350
Doesn't matter. This is
a criminal environment,

377
00:15:10,400 --> 00:15:11,460
and I'm taking the baby.

378
00:15:11,510 --> 00:15:12,520
(GASPS)

379
00:15:12,570 --> 00:15:14,790
Over my dead body.

380
00:15:14,840 --> 00:15:16,680
CeeCee is my granddaughter, too,

381
00:15:16,700 --> 00:15:18,360
and she is perfectly safe here.

382
00:15:18,410 --> 00:15:22,740
Well, as long as she's here, I'm here.

383
00:15:23,540 --> 00:15:24,830
Fine.

384
00:15:26,020 --> 00:15:27,380
Are you hungry?

385
00:15:27,420 --> 00:15:29,870
I have half a bucket of
spaghetti in the fridge.

386
00:15:30,760 --> 00:15:31,880
I could eat.

387
00:15:32,820 --> 00:15:34,710
All right, I'll go heat it up.

388
00:15:40,070 --> 00:15:42,750
(SCOFFS) What? You think I'm
gonna take the baby and run?

389
00:15:42,800 --> 00:15:44,890
Yes. Would you like some garlic bread?

390
00:15:44,940 --> 00:15:46,620
That sounds nice.

391
00:15:48,040 --> 00:15:50,440
You know, we should really
start looking for our own place.

392
00:15:50,490 --> 00:15:51,830
You think?

393
00:15:51,880 --> 00:15:54,830
I mean, the gambling room's doing great,

394
00:15:54,880 --> 00:15:55,999
and since we put in the roulette wheel,

395
00:15:56,000 --> 00:15:57,530
we're basically printing money.

396
00:15:57,580 --> 00:16:00,110
(SIGHS) Sure would like
to have my own bathroom.

397
00:16:00,160 --> 00:16:02,440
(SIGHS) Your own bathroom,

398
00:16:02,490 --> 00:16:04,000
one of them walk-in shoe closets

399
00:16:04,050 --> 00:16:06,360
like on<i> Lifestyles of
the Rich and Famous.</i>

400
00:16:07,008 --> 00:16:09,460
And carpet everywhere,
even in the kitchen.

401
00:16:09,510 --> 00:16:10,810
That's a terrible idea.

402
00:16:10,860 --> 00:16:12,870
'Cause of spilling and crumbs, sure.

403
00:16:12,920 --> 00:16:14,590
Point is, I want to spoil you,

404
00:16:14,640 --> 00:16:16,890
so whatever you want.

405
00:16:16,940 --> 00:16:18,100
♪ ♪

406
00:16:18,150 --> 00:16:22,030
Well, right now, I just want you.

407
00:16:22,940 --> 00:16:24,390
Really? Now?

408
00:16:24,440 --> 00:16:25,640
Yeah.

409
00:16:25,690 --> 00:16:27,230
Hot damn.

410
00:16:27,280 --> 00:16:30,450
<i>Just so you know, I promised
my dad I'd use condoms.</i>

411
00:16:30,500 --> 00:16:31,560
MANDY (CHUCKLES): <i>Good.</i>

412
00:16:32,920 --> 00:16:34,360
(CAR DOOR CLOSES)

413
00:16:34,960 --> 00:16:36,160
Now what?

414
00:16:36,920 --> 00:16:38,570
(SIGHS)

415
00:16:39,620 --> 00:16:40,880
Hey.

416
00:16:40,930 --> 00:16:42,410
Did you escape?

417
00:16:42,460 --> 00:16:45,580
Nah, they just brought me over
to pick up my pills and pj's.

418
00:16:45,630 --> 00:16:47,750
Oh, that's nice.

419
00:16:47,800 --> 00:16:49,160
Are you drunk?

420
00:16:49,217 --> 00:16:51,250
Uh, yeah, it sure feels like it.

421
00:16:56,150 --> 00:16:57,183
And where's the baby?

422
00:16:57,200 --> 00:16:59,102
Don't worry, she's not here.

423
00:16:59,110 --> 00:17:01,470
- Where is she?
- Mary's got her.

424
00:17:01,520 --> 00:17:02,770
So she knows about me?

425
00:17:02,820 --> 00:17:04,230
Yeah.

426
00:17:04,280 --> 00:17:05,640
(SIREN WHOOPS)

427
00:17:05,690 --> 00:17:07,500
My chariot awaits.

428
00:17:07,550 --> 00:17:08,570
DALE: Oh.

429
00:17:09,760 --> 00:17:10,970
Did you have dinner?

430
00:17:11,020 --> 00:17:14,410
They ordered in some
pizza from Del Bonos.

431
00:17:14,460 --> 00:17:15,700
That sounds good.

432
00:17:15,750 --> 00:17:18,320
- I had cold spaghetti.
- MEEMAW: All right.

433
00:17:18,370 --> 00:17:19,450
(PILLS RATTLING)

434
00:17:19,500 --> 00:17:21,360
Well, I'll see you Monday.

435
00:17:22,040 --> 00:17:24,050
Well, they have visiting hours.

436
00:17:24,100 --> 00:17:25,620
I can come tomorrow morning.

437
00:17:25,670 --> 00:17:27,090
Not till 1:00.

438
00:17:27,140 --> 00:17:29,570
Oh, I see. My game's on.

439
00:17:29,620 --> 00:17:32,830
- So, how about 4:30 or 5:00?
- I'll see you Monday.

440
00:17:32,880 --> 00:17:35,120
- All right. See ya.
- (DOOR OPENS, CLOSES)

441
00:17:36,280 --> 00:17:38,200
Well, why does she get pizza?

442
00:17:38,250 --> 00:17:39,550
I want pizza.

443
00:17:42,100 --> 00:17:44,430
- Thanks for coming by.
- Yeah, what's the situation?

444
00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:46,570
Well, right now it's kind of a standoff.

445
00:17:46,620 --> 00:17:48,693
They're eating spaghetti, and
Mary's holding the baby hostage.

446
00:17:48,694 --> 00:17:50,010
All right. What's our play?

447
00:17:50,060 --> 00:17:51,589
Well, I figured we'll be
dealing with each other

448
00:17:51,590 --> 00:17:54,110
for the rest of our lives,
so we got to keep things civil.

449
00:17:54,118 --> 00:17:56,158
- I'm with you.
- (STAMMERS) Let me start by saying,

450
00:17:56,180 --> 00:17:57,350
you are a pleasure.

451
00:17:57,400 --> 00:17:59,460
(CHUCKLES): Oh, back at you.

452
00:17:59,510 --> 00:18:01,160
And your daughter is a keeper.

453
00:18:01,210 --> 00:18:02,790
And your son is a fine young man.

454
00:18:02,840 --> 00:18:04,300
Thank you.

455
00:18:04,350 --> 00:18:06,000
So, you ready to do this?

456
00:18:06,050 --> 00:18:07,200
I'm right behind you.

457
00:18:07,250 --> 00:18:09,600
♪ ♪

458
00:18:09,650 --> 00:18:11,560
Hey, Mare, look who stopped by.

459
00:18:12,350 --> 00:18:14,210
- (CRICKETS CHIRPING)
- (CLOCK TICKING)

460
00:18:18,806 --> 00:18:20,600
Mmm, it's good coffee.

461
00:18:20,650 --> 00:18:21,710
Is that Folgers?

462
00:18:21,760 --> 00:18:23,420
Maxwell House.

463
00:18:23,470 --> 00:18:26,460
JIM: Ah, sure. Good to the last drop.

464
00:18:26,510 --> 00:18:28,060
Uh, Audrey, am I crazy,

465
00:18:28,110 --> 00:18:30,000
or didn't we used to
drink Maxwell House?

466
00:18:30,040 --> 00:18:31,060
Yes.

467
00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:32,880
Mm-hmm. Hmm.

468
00:18:32,930 --> 00:18:34,072
Why'd we change?

469
00:18:35,410 --> 00:18:36,580
It's a mystery.

470
00:18:36,620 --> 00:18:37,660
(CHUCKLES)

471
00:18:37,710 --> 00:18:38,950
Speaking of mysteries,

472
00:18:38,990 --> 00:18:41,640
Mary, did you ever find that
earring you were looking for?

473
00:18:42,600 --> 00:18:44,000
(CLEARS THROAT)

474
00:18:44,050 --> 00:18:46,040
Family heirloom just gone.

475
00:18:46,090 --> 00:18:48,210
Maybe her mother stole it.

476
00:18:48,260 --> 00:18:49,260
(EXHALES SHARPLY)

477
00:18:49,270 --> 00:18:50,720
I am not holding the baby anymore,

478
00:18:50,750 --> 00:18:51,964
so you better watch it.

479
00:18:54,360 --> 00:18:55,802
Audrey's uncle was a bank robber.

480
00:18:55,820 --> 00:18:58,220
- Jim!
- He's in Leavenworth.

481
00:18:58,270 --> 00:19:00,380
He's my uncle by marriage.

482
00:19:00,430 --> 00:19:04,630
Look, a-all I'm saying is every
family's got secrets, right?

483
00:19:04,686 --> 00:19:07,170
We sure got some
skeletons in the closet.

484
00:19:07,200 --> 00:19:08,690
MARY: We do not.

485
00:19:08,740 --> 00:19:10,360
Other than my mother.

486
00:19:10,410 --> 00:19:12,200
- (BREATHES DEEPLY)
- And?

487
00:19:12,250 --> 00:19:13,830
(MARY SIGHS)

488
00:19:13,880 --> 00:19:16,948
My cousin Janine is a
practicing witch, but that's it.

489
00:19:18,320 --> 00:19:20,240
- Worships Satan.
- (SIGHS HEAVILY)

490
00:19:20,290 --> 00:19:22,510
I got you beat.

491
00:19:22,560 --> 00:19:24,100
My brother William...

492
00:19:24,990 --> 00:19:26,880
(WHISPERS): He's a Democrat.

493
00:19:26,930 --> 00:19:28,550
He voted for Mondale.

494
00:19:28,600 --> 00:19:30,910
- Aw, I'm so sorry.
- JIM: Mm.

495
00:19:30,960 --> 00:19:33,420
Actually, feels good to talk about it.

496
00:19:38,469 --> 00:19:41,490
(CRICKETS CHIRPING)

497
00:19:41,540 --> 00:19:43,660
Are you sure there's a body down here?

498
00:19:43,720 --> 00:19:45,760
Oh, yeah, keep digging.

499
00:19:47,050 --> 00:19:49,810
ADULT SHELDON: <i>I'd like to tell
you I found something that night,</i>

500
00:19:49,860 --> 00:19:52,550
<i>but for once you all
might be ahead of me.</i>

501
00:19:52,600 --> 00:19:56,696
- Synced & corrected by<font color="#E83286"> MementMori </font>-
-- <font color="#138CE9">www.addic7ed.com</font> --

