1 00:00:02,503 --> 00:00:04,272 ADULT SHELDON: While my sister and I are twins, 2 00:00:04,296 --> 00:00:06,048 we've always been different. 3 00:00:06,132 --> 00:00:08,968 By the age of two, I was reading books. 4 00:00:09,051 --> 00:00:11,178 Missy was content to eat them. 5 00:00:11,262 --> 00:00:13,764 By five, I had a healthy appreciation 6 00:00:13,848 --> 00:00:15,683 for a well-organized work space. 7 00:00:16,392 --> 00:00:19,228 My sister less so. 8 00:00:19,311 --> 00:00:21,230 - [Missy giggles] - Which is not to say 9 00:00:21,313 --> 00:00:23,065 she doesn't have qualities I admire. 10 00:00:23,149 --> 00:00:24,442 Get it. Get it. 11 00:00:24,525 --> 00:00:26,610 It's just a spider. Calm down. 12 00:00:26,694 --> 00:00:28,320 It's got eight legs and fangs. 13 00:00:28,404 --> 00:00:30,156 I see no reason to be calm. [thud] 14 00:00:30,239 --> 00:00:31,407 Did you kill it? 15 00:00:31,490 --> 00:00:33,576 - Yup. - Are you sure? 16 00:00:33,659 --> 00:00:35,369 You tell me. [yelling] 17 00:00:35,453 --> 00:00:39,165 The bond between twins is an incredibly close one, 18 00:00:39,248 --> 00:00:41,917 which is why I moved 1,500 miles to California 19 00:00:42,001 --> 00:00:43,836 the first chance I got. 20 00:00:45,713 --> 00:00:48,549 ♪♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪♪ 21 00:00:48,632 --> 00:00:51,469 ♪♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪♪ 22 00:00:51,552 --> 00:00:53,971 ♪♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪♪ 23 00:00:54,055 --> 00:00:56,348 ♪♪ I am a mighty little man ♪♪ 24 00:00:56,432 --> 00:01:00,227 ♪♪ I am a mighty little man ♪♪ 25 00:01:03,773 --> 00:01:05,274 - Hey. - Hello. 26 00:01:05,357 --> 00:01:06,358 You got a minute? 27 00:01:06,442 --> 00:01:08,362 John has something he wants to talk to you about. 28 00:01:08,444 --> 00:01:09,987 I brought you kolaches. 29 00:01:10,071 --> 00:01:11,238 Ooh, yummy. 30 00:01:11,322 --> 00:01:12,948 Mmm. Mmm. [chuckles] 31 00:01:13,032 --> 00:01:14,492 So, what's up? 32 00:01:14,575 --> 00:01:16,595 You comin' to me to ask for Connie's hand in marriage? 33 00:01:16,619 --> 00:01:18,079 No. 34 00:01:18,704 --> 00:01:20,956 But if that were to come to pass, 35 00:01:21,040 --> 00:01:24,001 are you authorized to bless the union? 36 00:01:26,295 --> 00:01:27,630 He was joking. 37 00:01:27,713 --> 00:01:29,006 Oh. 38 00:01:30,091 --> 00:01:31,884 - Tell him. - Okay. 39 00:01:31,967 --> 00:01:33,677 So, some colleagues of mine 40 00:01:33,761 --> 00:01:37,473 at the university are doing a research study on twins. 41 00:01:37,556 --> 00:01:40,101 I told them about Sheldon and his sister, 42 00:01:40,184 --> 00:01:42,186 and they were most intrigued. 43 00:01:42,269 --> 00:01:44,105 Uh, what kind of study? 44 00:01:44,188 --> 00:01:45,815 It's a longitudinal investigation 45 00:01:45,898 --> 00:01:48,067 of environmental and genetic factors 46 00:01:48,150 --> 00:01:51,153 in the development of cognitive and other capacities 47 00:01:51,237 --> 00:01:54,406 in pairs of fraternal and identical twins. 48 00:01:55,366 --> 00:01:56,867 You asked. 49 00:01:56,951 --> 00:02:00,079 [chuckles] Well, geez, I don't... I don't know 50 00:02:00,162 --> 00:02:02,665 if I want some scientists pokin' and proddin' the kids. 51 00:02:02,748 --> 00:02:04,226 Oh, but they wouldn't be poked and prodded. 52 00:02:04,250 --> 00:02:06,919 They just have to, you know, answer some questions. 53 00:02:07,002 --> 00:02:09,505 And maybe some puzzles and tests. 54 00:02:10,131 --> 00:02:12,091 That's not too bad. Where is it? 55 00:02:12,174 --> 00:02:14,301 - Houston. - And it just got bad. 56 00:02:14,385 --> 00:02:16,345 That's... that's a long drive. 57 00:02:16,428 --> 00:02:20,015 It does pay $50 an hour plus gas and expenses. 58 00:02:20,724 --> 00:02:21,809 Really? 59 00:02:21,892 --> 00:02:23,769 I told you to start with that. 60 00:02:24,478 --> 00:02:25,938 Oh. 61 00:02:28,190 --> 00:02:29,859 No. See, Mary, that's the best part... 62 00:02:29,942 --> 00:02:32,278 there's no pokin' and proddin'. Plus, 63 00:02:32,361 --> 00:02:34,613 you know how much Sheldon loves puzzles and tests. 64 00:02:34,697 --> 00:02:36,323 I'm not sure. 65 00:02:36,407 --> 00:02:38,284 [sighs] Think about the money. 66 00:02:38,367 --> 00:02:41,078 50 bucks an hour, four or five hours a week. 67 00:02:41,162 --> 00:02:42,639 That... that's more than our mortgage. 68 00:02:42,663 --> 00:02:44,331 I know, I know. 69 00:02:44,415 --> 00:02:45,958 But Sheldon's already self-conscious 70 00:02:46,041 --> 00:02:47,585 about being different from other kids. 71 00:02:47,668 --> 00:02:49,461 I worry how this might affect him. 72 00:02:49,545 --> 00:02:51,630 You're being too protective. He's a rock. 73 00:02:51,714 --> 00:02:53,257 A rock? 74 00:02:53,340 --> 00:02:54,925 Are we raising the same child? 75 00:02:55,009 --> 00:02:56,677 And what about Missy? 76 00:02:56,760 --> 00:02:58,429 Aren't these tests gonna make her feel bad 77 00:02:58,512 --> 00:03:00,014 that she's not as smart as Sheldon? 78 00:03:00,097 --> 00:03:01,765 [snorts] I'm not as smart as Sheldon. 79 00:03:01,849 --> 00:03:03,809 Doesn't make me feel bad. 80 00:03:03,893 --> 00:03:06,896 And we could put the money aside for their college education. 81 00:03:07,938 --> 00:03:09,190 That's a good point. 82 00:03:09,273 --> 00:03:10,357 It's a great point. 83 00:03:10,441 --> 00:03:12,043 I don't have to tell you, times are changing. 84 00:03:12,067 --> 00:03:13,569 Kids are pitching in. 85 00:03:13,652 --> 00:03:15,571 Like that Webster kid on TV... 86 00:03:15,654 --> 00:03:17,907 he's making buckets of money for his parents. 87 00:03:19,116 --> 00:03:20,492 Well... 88 00:03:20,576 --> 00:03:22,203 I suppose we could give it a try. 89 00:03:22,286 --> 00:03:24,121 There you go. I'll call Sturgis, 90 00:03:24,205 --> 00:03:25,831 tell him we're in. 91 00:03:25,915 --> 00:03:28,125 Baby, I'm getting a fishing boat. 92 00:03:31,462 --> 00:03:35,090 So, Sheldon, Missy, we got some exciting news. 93 00:03:35,174 --> 00:03:37,468 - Georgie took a bath? - No. 94 00:03:37,551 --> 00:03:39,303 And how come I don't get exciting news? 95 00:03:39,386 --> 00:03:40,888 This isn't about you. 96 00:03:40,971 --> 00:03:43,307 But after dinner, why don't you go rinse off? 97 00:03:43,390 --> 00:03:45,142 - So, what's up? - Well, 98 00:03:45,226 --> 00:03:46,852 a couple of scientists at the college 99 00:03:46,936 --> 00:03:48,312 where Dr. Sturgis teaches are doing 100 00:03:48,395 --> 00:03:50,439 a research study on twins. 101 00:03:50,522 --> 00:03:52,608 They want to meet you guys, ask you some questions. 102 00:03:52,691 --> 00:03:54,652 Oh, boy, a research study. 103 00:03:54,735 --> 00:03:56,015 Will they give us written tests? 104 00:03:56,070 --> 00:03:58,489 - Yeah, I think so. - Oh, boy. 105 00:03:58,572 --> 00:04:01,659 Now, you don't have to do this if you don't want to. 106 00:04:01,742 --> 00:04:02,993 It's purely volunteer. 107 00:04:03,077 --> 00:04:04,328 I don't want to do it. 108 00:04:04,411 --> 00:04:06,580 - Why not? - They probably just want to find out 109 00:04:06,664 --> 00:04:09,333 why you're so smart and I'm just average. 110 00:04:09,416 --> 00:04:12,378 [quietly] Average? That's a little generous. 111 00:04:12,461 --> 00:04:13,879 Why don't they want to test me? 112 00:04:13,963 --> 00:04:16,215 - Georgie, not now. - 'Cause I'm available. 113 00:04:16,757 --> 00:04:18,235 Listen, why don't we just go there this Saturday 114 00:04:18,259 --> 00:04:19,260 and give it a try? 115 00:04:19,343 --> 00:04:21,845 And if you don't like it, we don't have to do it again. 116 00:04:21,929 --> 00:04:23,889 Or they'll love it, and they'll do it till 117 00:04:23,973 --> 00:04:25,683 they're 18, 19 years old. 118 00:04:25,766 --> 00:04:27,184 I already love it. 119 00:04:27,268 --> 00:04:29,603 My man. Missy? 120 00:04:32,106 --> 00:04:34,608 I believe there might be a Dairy Queen on the way there. 121 00:04:35,943 --> 00:04:37,945 Can I get an Oreo Blizzard? 122 00:04:38,028 --> 00:04:39,196 You know what I think? 123 00:04:39,280 --> 00:04:41,740 I think you're smarter than him. 124 00:04:44,326 --> 00:04:46,829 Dr. Thorpe and Dr. Pilson, 125 00:04:46,912 --> 00:04:48,998 here are your research volunteers, 126 00:04:49,081 --> 00:04:50,165 Sheldon and Missy. 127 00:04:50,249 --> 00:04:51,417 So nice to meet you. 128 00:04:51,500 --> 00:04:53,752 Thank you for participating in our study. 129 00:04:53,836 --> 00:04:56,588 Always happy to help advance our understanding of me. 130 00:04:56,672 --> 00:04:58,215 I'm just in it for the Dairy Queen. 131 00:04:58,757 --> 00:05:00,175 All right. 132 00:05:00,259 --> 00:05:02,052 Um, if you two wouldn't mind waiting here, 133 00:05:02,136 --> 00:05:04,513 we'd like to start by talking to your mom, dad, and grandma. 134 00:05:05,514 --> 00:05:06,765 Why? 135 00:05:06,849 --> 00:05:08,285 Just to get some background information 136 00:05:08,309 --> 00:05:09,518 on the both of you. 137 00:05:09,601 --> 00:05:12,855 Smart. Ask how old I was when I completed potty training. 138 00:05:12,938 --> 00:05:14,148 You won't believe it. 139 00:05:14,773 --> 00:05:16,525 I'll do that. 140 00:05:16,608 --> 00:05:18,777 Will you keep an eye on 'em? 141 00:05:18,861 --> 00:05:21,363 Well, I'll try, but if they start running, 142 00:05:21,447 --> 00:05:22,549 you may never see them again. 143 00:05:22,573 --> 00:05:23,574 [laughs] 144 00:05:24,366 --> 00:05:25,659 Shall we? 145 00:05:27,953 --> 00:05:29,288 We are on the clock, right? 146 00:05:29,371 --> 00:05:30,706 - George. - Hmm? 147 00:05:39,340 --> 00:05:42,217 [chuckles] Boy, this brings back some memories. 148 00:05:42,301 --> 00:05:45,179 How come? Well, when I was your age, 149 00:05:45,262 --> 00:05:48,432 I was also taken to a university to be studied. 150 00:05:48,515 --> 00:05:50,768 Because they thought you were really smart? 151 00:05:50,851 --> 00:05:54,271 Because they thought I was clinically insane. 152 00:05:54,355 --> 00:05:56,398 And it wasn't just me. 153 00:05:56,482 --> 00:05:58,192 Did you know that when Albert Einstein 154 00:05:58,275 --> 00:06:00,277 was a little boy, his parents worried 155 00:06:00,361 --> 00:06:02,321 there was something wrong with him? 156 00:06:02,404 --> 00:06:04,156 Because he couldn't comb his hair? 157 00:06:04,239 --> 00:06:07,242 No, that was a choice he made later in life. 158 00:06:07,326 --> 00:06:08,952 When he was young, 159 00:06:09,036 --> 00:06:11,914 he wanted nothing to do with other children, 160 00:06:11,997 --> 00:06:15,501 and would often have extreme temper tantrums. 161 00:06:16,126 --> 00:06:17,336 He sounds like you. 162 00:06:17,419 --> 00:06:20,172 I know. Isn't it great? 163 00:06:23,008 --> 00:06:24,635 Well, to be perfectly honest, 164 00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:27,554 Sheldon has always avoided children his own age. 165 00:06:27,638 --> 00:06:28,972 Tell 'em about temper tantrums. 166 00:06:29,056 --> 00:06:32,351 They're not temper tantrums, he just has strong opinions. 167 00:06:32,434 --> 00:06:33,560 [chuckles] Yeah, 168 00:06:33,644 --> 00:06:35,896 like when you yell and stomp your feet, 169 00:06:35,979 --> 00:06:38,774 and slam the door off its hinge. 170 00:06:39,358 --> 00:06:41,235 They're scientists. You can't trick 'em. 171 00:06:44,071 --> 00:06:46,115 And, as for Missy, she's just the opposite. 172 00:06:46,198 --> 00:06:48,450 Loves to be around people and other kids. 173 00:06:48,534 --> 00:06:49,701 Makes friends easy. 174 00:06:49,785 --> 00:06:51,912 Does she have temper tantrums as well? 175 00:06:51,995 --> 00:06:54,206 Nope. She's very even-keeled. 176 00:06:54,289 --> 00:06:55,457 Except for when she's eating. 177 00:06:55,541 --> 00:06:56,741 You put your hand near her face 178 00:06:56,792 --> 00:06:58,103 when she's working on a lamb chop, 179 00:06:58,127 --> 00:06:59,628 she will bite off a finger. 180 00:06:59,711 --> 00:07:01,797 [laughs] Our daughter doesn't bite. 181 00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:05,342 Right here, Thanksgiving, 1986. 182 00:07:07,803 --> 00:07:10,764 Was there anything unusual about your pregnancy? 183 00:07:10,848 --> 00:07:13,267 - No, not that I remember. - Really? 184 00:07:13,350 --> 00:07:15,477 You cried for, like, seven months. 185 00:07:15,561 --> 00:07:17,604 Those were tears of joy. [weak laugh] 186 00:07:17,688 --> 00:07:19,481 What about all those times you punched me? 187 00:07:19,565 --> 00:07:20,941 Punches of joy. 188 00:07:22,484 --> 00:07:24,736 You're not gonna get much out of Fred and Wilma here. 189 00:07:24,820 --> 00:07:27,239 Why don't you just get crackin' on the kids? 190 00:07:29,450 --> 00:07:32,911 Okay, Sheldon, this first battery of tests measures 191 00:07:32,995 --> 00:07:35,122 basic problem-solving abilities. 192 00:07:35,205 --> 00:07:38,417 Is the Kaufman test or the Wechsler Intelligence Scale? 193 00:07:39,460 --> 00:07:41,128 Are you familiar with those? 194 00:07:41,211 --> 00:07:43,291 It's embarrassing, but I enjoy a little light reading 195 00:07:43,338 --> 00:07:44,339 in the bathroom. 196 00:07:45,424 --> 00:07:48,010 Okay. Are you ready? 197 00:07:48,093 --> 00:07:50,220 - Will I be timed? - Yes. 198 00:07:50,304 --> 00:07:53,557 Fantastic. [stopwatch clicks] 199 00:07:54,391 --> 00:07:55,392 Okay, Missy, 200 00:07:55,476 --> 00:07:57,102 the first thing we're gonna do is test 201 00:07:57,186 --> 00:07:58,645 your problem-solving abilities. 202 00:07:58,729 --> 00:08:01,106 - Okay. - You ready? 203 00:08:01,190 --> 00:08:02,441 I just have one question. 204 00:08:02,524 --> 00:08:03,609 What's that? 205 00:08:03,692 --> 00:08:05,194 Do you always wear your hair up? 206 00:08:05,277 --> 00:08:08,739 Uh, well, usually at work, yes. 207 00:08:08,822 --> 00:08:10,616 I bet it looks cute down. 208 00:08:11,575 --> 00:08:13,452 Thank you. Okay, 209 00:08:14,369 --> 00:08:15,370 you're all set. 210 00:08:15,454 --> 00:08:17,247 Is that camera gonna be on? 211 00:08:17,331 --> 00:08:18,582 Yes. 212 00:08:18,665 --> 00:08:20,125 Can you move it over to that side? 213 00:08:20,209 --> 00:08:21,251 Why? 214 00:08:21,335 --> 00:08:23,146 If I've learned one thing from school picture day, 215 00:08:23,170 --> 00:08:24,922 it's that I look better from that side. 216 00:08:25,797 --> 00:08:28,550 Sure, I'll move it. 217 00:08:29,885 --> 00:08:30,969 Okay... 218 00:08:31,053 --> 00:08:32,346 And bring it a little closer. 219 00:08:35,766 --> 00:08:37,392 - How's that? - Great. 220 00:08:37,476 --> 00:08:38,685 Okay. 221 00:08:38,769 --> 00:08:41,563 - [sighs] Whenever you're ready. - Wait. 222 00:08:41,647 --> 00:08:43,815 Do I have any Oreos in my teeth? 223 00:08:44,691 --> 00:08:45,776 No. 224 00:08:45,859 --> 00:08:47,361 - Ready to start? - One last thing. 225 00:08:47,444 --> 00:08:50,280 Did you ever think of wearing that white coat with a belt? 226 00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:52,533 No. You should. 227 00:08:52,616 --> 00:08:54,243 'Cause you have a very nice figure, 228 00:08:54,326 --> 00:08:56,828 and it's lost in there. 229 00:08:59,122 --> 00:09:01,291 Hey, check this out. 230 00:09:02,042 --> 00:09:04,127 Did you see Honey, I Shrunk the Kids? 231 00:09:04,211 --> 00:09:05,837 - No. - You should. 232 00:09:05,921 --> 00:09:07,965 'Cause there's a lot of good science stuff in it. 233 00:09:08,048 --> 00:09:09,258 [laughing] 234 00:09:10,259 --> 00:09:11,260 Kudos on the question 235 00:09:11,343 --> 00:09:13,679 "Which train gets to St. Louis first?" 236 00:09:14,596 --> 00:09:15,806 Hmm. 237 00:09:17,558 --> 00:09:19,476 I have to tell you something. 238 00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:21,478 Why don't you finish the test first? 239 00:09:21,562 --> 00:09:22,854 This can't wait. 240 00:09:22,938 --> 00:09:25,065 The other doctor's got a crush on you. 241 00:09:25,148 --> 00:09:26,775 Oh, dear Lord. 242 00:09:26,858 --> 00:09:28,235 Oh, um... 243 00:09:28,318 --> 00:09:31,071 I don't... I don't think so. 244 00:09:31,154 --> 00:09:32,447 Let's get back to the test. 245 00:09:33,198 --> 00:09:34,408 Okay. 246 00:09:36,910 --> 00:09:38,287 Why? What did you see? 247 00:09:38,370 --> 00:09:40,998 When you're not looking, he stares at your tushy. 248 00:09:41,081 --> 00:09:42,207 [whispering] Really? 249 00:09:42,291 --> 00:09:44,001 Imagine if you wore the belt. 250 00:09:45,335 --> 00:09:46,628 Clever girl. 251 00:09:46,712 --> 00:09:49,506 That would accentuate her buttocks. 252 00:09:51,925 --> 00:09:54,011 I can't watch. Switch it back to Sheldon. 253 00:09:56,138 --> 00:09:58,390 Hot dog, syllogisms. 254 00:09:58,473 --> 00:10:00,017 If all squares are parallelograms, 255 00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:02,185 and all squares are rectangles, 256 00:10:02,269 --> 00:10:04,563 then some parallelograms are rectangles. 257 00:10:04,646 --> 00:10:07,107 Who was this test made for, children? 258 00:10:07,190 --> 00:10:09,109 I'm bored. Turn it back to Missy. 259 00:10:10,277 --> 00:10:12,195 Go ahead. 260 00:10:12,279 --> 00:10:14,656 This question about a train going to "S-T" Louis 261 00:10:14,740 --> 00:10:16,825 makes no sense. 262 00:10:16,908 --> 00:10:18,994 DR. THORPE: It's okay to guess. 263 00:10:20,621 --> 00:10:23,040 Take your time, baby. The meter's running. 264 00:10:23,123 --> 00:10:25,542 [cash register dings] 265 00:10:25,626 --> 00:10:28,420 DR. THORPE: Well, thank you all very much. 266 00:10:28,503 --> 00:10:30,130 This was a great start. 267 00:10:30,213 --> 00:10:32,174 Thank you. Did you have fun? 268 00:10:32,257 --> 00:10:35,302 I got to take a test on a Saturday. Heck yeah. 269 00:10:35,385 --> 00:10:39,348 He's like a young version of me, but without corrective shoes. 270 00:10:39,431 --> 00:10:40,432 [chuckles] 271 00:10:40,515 --> 00:10:41,642 Missy, what'd you think? 272 00:10:41,725 --> 00:10:42,893 The tests were just okay, 273 00:10:42,976 --> 00:10:44,269 but I like Sandra. 274 00:10:45,062 --> 00:10:48,023 Well, thank you, Missy. I like you, too. 275 00:10:48,815 --> 00:10:51,526 PILSON: All right, we'll see y'all next Saturday. 276 00:10:51,610 --> 00:10:53,236 You bet we will. 277 00:10:54,321 --> 00:10:57,824 Good God, George, have a little dignity. 278 00:11:02,579 --> 00:11:05,332 Are you doing something different with your hair? 279 00:11:06,750 --> 00:11:09,252 No, uh, why? 280 00:11:09,878 --> 00:11:12,506 No reason, just looks nice. 281 00:11:13,423 --> 00:11:15,258 Oh! [chuckles] Thank you. 282 00:11:15,342 --> 00:11:18,095 Um, uh, what do you think about maybe stopping 283 00:11:18,178 --> 00:11:21,723 for a drink after, to discuss the test results? 284 00:11:21,807 --> 00:11:24,184 I would like that. 285 00:11:31,274 --> 00:11:35,404 ♪♪♪♪ 286 00:11:36,905 --> 00:11:37,948 Oh, yeah. 287 00:11:38,031 --> 00:11:39,783 Get down. 288 00:11:39,866 --> 00:11:40,992 [door opens] 289 00:11:41,076 --> 00:11:43,745 - MARY: We're home. - Hey. 290 00:11:44,621 --> 00:11:47,207 - What you watching? - Soul Train. 291 00:11:47,290 --> 00:11:48,917 I like trains. 292 00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:51,002 It's not that kind of train, dummy. 293 00:11:51,545 --> 00:11:54,131 Well, that seems like false advertising. 294 00:11:58,802 --> 00:12:01,138 Ooh, you sexy little thing. 295 00:12:01,221 --> 00:12:02,931 MARY: George! 296 00:12:04,850 --> 00:12:06,184 [sighs] 297 00:12:07,602 --> 00:12:10,689 I do not like what this study is doing to Sheldon. 298 00:12:10,772 --> 00:12:12,816 What're you talking about? He had a great time. 299 00:12:12,899 --> 00:12:14,651 All the way home all he could talk about 300 00:12:14,735 --> 00:12:17,571 is how that doctor thought he was so smart. It's not healthy. 301 00:12:18,238 --> 00:12:19,298 Would it make you feel any better 302 00:12:19,322 --> 00:12:20,925 if I told you how much money we made today? 303 00:12:20,949 --> 00:12:22,117 No, it would not. 304 00:12:22,200 --> 00:12:23,535 $300. 305 00:12:23,618 --> 00:12:25,203 - Really? - Cash. 306 00:12:27,330 --> 00:12:29,791 Okay, well, still, I... 307 00:12:29,875 --> 00:12:32,586 I'm not interested in profiting off my children. 308 00:12:32,669 --> 00:12:35,672 You see, honey, that's where you and I are very different. 309 00:12:45,932 --> 00:12:46,975 Boats. 310 00:12:47,684 --> 00:12:49,519 Sheldon, what do you think 311 00:12:49,603 --> 00:12:51,271 is happening in this picture? 312 00:12:51,354 --> 00:12:54,274 Easy. There are four chimpanzees in a living room. 313 00:12:54,357 --> 00:12:56,526 PILSON: Okay, but what can you tell me about them? 314 00:12:57,611 --> 00:12:59,905 They're not behaving like chimpanzees. 315 00:12:59,988 --> 00:13:00,989 Anything else? 316 00:13:01,823 --> 00:13:03,742 Chimpanzees don't drink tea. 317 00:13:04,493 --> 00:13:06,369 Is that it? 318 00:13:06,912 --> 00:13:08,139 Well, I suppose it might be coffee, 319 00:13:08,163 --> 00:13:09,748 but they don't drink that either. 320 00:13:10,332 --> 00:13:12,876 Anything interesting about their body language? 321 00:13:14,878 --> 00:13:15,962 No. 322 00:13:16,046 --> 00:13:18,131 I think they found his kryptonite. 323 00:13:22,135 --> 00:13:25,597 Missy, what do you think is happening in this picture? 324 00:13:25,680 --> 00:13:26,848 The girl monkey on the couch 325 00:13:26,932 --> 00:13:28,433 is telling the guy monkey a secret. 326 00:13:28,517 --> 00:13:31,186 Must be something juicy, 'cause he's smiling. 327 00:13:31,269 --> 00:13:32,521 Anything else? 328 00:13:32,604 --> 00:13:33,939 It might be dirty, 329 00:13:34,022 --> 00:13:35,166 'cause this girl monkey is sending 330 00:13:35,190 --> 00:13:36,817 the kid monkey out of the room. 331 00:13:36,900 --> 00:13:39,319 He doesn't want to go. He looks sad. 332 00:13:39,402 --> 00:13:40,487 Is that all? 333 00:13:40,570 --> 00:13:42,405 The monkeys on the couch are drinking tea, 334 00:13:42,489 --> 00:13:43,949 so it's a tea party. 335 00:13:44,032 --> 00:13:47,202 Okay, very good. Let's look at another picture. 336 00:13:47,285 --> 00:13:50,622 I'm not done. The monkey in the painting 337 00:13:50,705 --> 00:13:51,915 is wearing an old lady hat, 338 00:13:51,998 --> 00:13:53,917 so she's probably a meemaw monkey. 339 00:13:54,751 --> 00:13:56,002 She's not at the party, 340 00:13:56,086 --> 00:13:58,922 so she must be bowling or dead. 341 00:14:00,048 --> 00:14:02,884 Well, Missy won that round. 342 00:14:02,968 --> 00:14:05,512 It's actually not a contest, George. 343 00:14:05,595 --> 00:14:07,347 This is Texas. Everything's a contest. 344 00:14:08,390 --> 00:14:09,933 A woman in a doorway. 345 00:14:10,016 --> 00:14:11,434 Anything else? 346 00:14:11,518 --> 00:14:13,603 She's holding her head with her hand. 347 00:14:13,687 --> 00:14:15,522 And what do you think that means? 348 00:14:15,605 --> 00:14:17,148 Um... 349 00:14:17,232 --> 00:14:20,026 Wouldn't you rather ask me about trains going to St. Louis? 350 00:14:20,110 --> 00:14:23,238 Good gravy, she's sad, Sheldon, come on. 351 00:14:23,864 --> 00:14:25,574 Oh, she's very upset. 352 00:14:25,657 --> 00:14:27,617 I don't know why. 353 00:14:27,701 --> 00:14:29,536 Oh! Maybe she wasn't invited 354 00:14:29,619 --> 00:14:31,454 to the tea party at the monkey house. 355 00:14:31,538 --> 00:14:33,123 [chuckles] 356 00:14:33,206 --> 00:14:35,375 Also, she's wearing a belt, like you are. 357 00:14:35,458 --> 00:14:37,294 Nice going. Very cute. 358 00:14:39,004 --> 00:14:40,255 [no audible dialogue] 359 00:14:40,338 --> 00:14:41,756 And I'm loving the hair. 360 00:14:41,840 --> 00:14:43,592 [whispers] Yeah. 361 00:14:43,675 --> 00:14:46,261 A lion sitting in a chair, holding a pipe. 362 00:14:46,344 --> 00:14:47,345 Good. 363 00:14:47,429 --> 00:14:49,556 But what do you think is on his mind? 364 00:14:49,639 --> 00:14:51,474 How should I know? Maybe he's wondering 365 00:14:51,558 --> 00:14:53,268 why he's posing for a silly picture 366 00:14:53,351 --> 00:14:54,644 instead of eating a gazelle. 367 00:14:55,604 --> 00:14:56,646 PILSON: Anything else? 368 00:14:57,522 --> 00:14:59,691 What exactly are we doing here? 369 00:14:59,774 --> 00:15:01,192 I thought the purpose of this study 370 00:15:01,276 --> 00:15:03,194 was to find out how smart I am. 371 00:15:03,278 --> 00:15:05,071 PILSON: That's what we're doing, 372 00:15:05,155 --> 00:15:06,955 but there are different kinds of intelligence. 373 00:15:07,657 --> 00:15:08,783 Poppycock! 374 00:15:08,867 --> 00:15:10,052 There's only one kind of intelligence... 375 00:15:10,076 --> 00:15:11,745 George, Sheldon's getting upset. 376 00:15:11,828 --> 00:15:13,038 I don't like it. 377 00:15:13,121 --> 00:15:14,881 All right, I'll just change it back to Missy. 378 00:15:16,041 --> 00:15:18,418 You are an insightful young lady. 379 00:15:18,501 --> 00:15:20,837 I don't know what that means, but thank you. 380 00:15:20,921 --> 00:15:22,797 It means perceptive. 381 00:15:22,881 --> 00:15:24,841 You see things most people miss. 382 00:15:24,925 --> 00:15:27,218 My name is Missy... go figure. 383 00:15:28,178 --> 00:15:29,429 Have you always been that way? 384 00:15:29,512 --> 00:15:32,223 I guess so. I think when you're on your own a lot, 385 00:15:32,307 --> 00:15:34,309 you get good at seeing that kind of stuff. 386 00:15:34,392 --> 00:15:36,436 THORPE: Really? 387 00:15:36,519 --> 00:15:38,521 MISSY: My dad does football with my older brother, 388 00:15:38,605 --> 00:15:40,440 so they're like a team. 389 00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:44,694 And my mom and meemaw spend all their time fussing over Sheldon, 390 00:15:44,778 --> 00:15:46,571 so they're like a team, too. 391 00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:48,865 So no one's on your team? 392 00:15:49,407 --> 00:15:51,785 Nope. It's just me. 393 00:15:51,868 --> 00:15:53,411 Oh, Lord. 394 00:15:54,704 --> 00:15:57,290 Hey, what's up with you and Dr. Pillsbury? 395 00:15:58,375 --> 00:15:59,793 Dr. Pilson? 396 00:16:00,335 --> 00:16:02,712 I don't know what you're talking about. 397 00:16:02,796 --> 00:16:04,047 Oh. 398 00:16:04,130 --> 00:16:06,132 You can't say 'cause we're on camera. 399 00:16:06,841 --> 00:16:08,593 [sighs] 400 00:16:08,677 --> 00:16:10,887 Insightful. 401 00:16:16,685 --> 00:16:18,603 A little late for me to start cooking. 402 00:16:18,687 --> 00:16:20,939 - Why don't we stop somewhere for dinner? - Really? 403 00:16:21,022 --> 00:16:23,525 The five of us? That's kind of pricey. 404 00:16:23,608 --> 00:16:26,820 Would you rather buy a fishing boat? 405 00:16:26,903 --> 00:16:28,339 You're a blabbermouth, you know that? 406 00:16:28,363 --> 00:16:29,948 [Meemaw laughs] 407 00:16:30,031 --> 00:16:32,117 Missy, we're gonna eat in a restaurant. 408 00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:33,451 Where would you like to go? 409 00:16:33,535 --> 00:16:34,911 I get to pick? 410 00:16:34,995 --> 00:16:37,163 - Mm-hm? - Why don't I get to pick? 411 00:16:37,247 --> 00:16:38,557 Because your sister's getting to pick. 412 00:16:38,581 --> 00:16:40,458 It's not just about you in this house. 413 00:16:41,459 --> 00:16:42,836 What do you think, baby? 414 00:16:42,919 --> 00:16:44,546 I pick... 415 00:16:45,171 --> 00:16:46,589 Red Lobster. 416 00:16:46,673 --> 00:16:48,425 You got it. 417 00:16:49,092 --> 00:16:50,510 Damn. 418 00:16:50,593 --> 00:16:52,053 There goes our per diem. 419 00:16:59,102 --> 00:17:01,730 ANNOUNCER: Out of an I formation, it's the option... 420 00:17:01,813 --> 00:17:03,148 George, you got a minute? 421 00:17:03,231 --> 00:17:04,816 - What's up? - Not you. 422 00:17:05,358 --> 00:17:07,402 - Him. - What? 423 00:17:07,485 --> 00:17:09,988 Sheldon told me that we get paid to go to that college 424 00:17:10,071 --> 00:17:11,573 and answer their questions. 425 00:17:12,198 --> 00:17:13,283 Yeah, so? 426 00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:15,618 I want to know how much we're making. 427 00:17:16,494 --> 00:17:17,579 Why? 428 00:17:17,662 --> 00:17:19,122 'Cause I want my fair share. 429 00:17:19,748 --> 00:17:21,499 Is that so? 430 00:17:22,042 --> 00:17:23,877 What do you think your fair share is? 431 00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:25,086 Half. 432 00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:28,214 Hm, guess that sounds right. 433 00:17:28,298 --> 00:17:29,799 So how much are we making? 434 00:17:30,550 --> 00:17:32,510 $7.50 a week. 435 00:17:32,594 --> 00:17:34,804 - Really? - Really. 436 00:17:35,555 --> 00:17:36,973 Well, I want half that. 437 00:17:37,057 --> 00:17:38,224 Which is? 438 00:17:39,934 --> 00:17:41,144 Hang on. 439 00:17:41,978 --> 00:17:43,438 Sheldon! 440 00:17:44,147 --> 00:17:45,440 Can we put on Soul Train? 441 00:17:45,523 --> 00:17:46,733 Why? 442 00:17:46,816 --> 00:17:49,360 There's a girl on there I kind of want to marry.