﻿1
00:00:01,245 --> 00:00:03,783
Previously on Young Sheldon...

2
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Checkmate. You lose.

3
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5,730-year half-life of carbon-14

4
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is used as a geochronometer.

5
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Anything else you'd like to add?

6
00:00:12,855 --> 00:00:15,019
I read this magazine.

7
00:00:15,022 --> 00:00:16,884
Why won't you compete with me?

8
00:00:16,886 --> 00:00:19,191
Because it's fun watching you get upset.

9
00:00:19,193 --> 00:00:20,366
What's fun about it?

10
00:00:20,368 --> 00:00:21,901
Everything.

11
00:00:24,111 --> 00:00:26,111
ADULT SHELDON: I've never
been good at sharing.

12
00:00:26,113 --> 00:00:28,769
- I had to share a womb...
- MISSY: Ow.

13
00:00:28,772 --> 00:00:29,987
SHELDON: Ow.

14
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["Rico Suave" by Gerardo
playing over headphones]

15
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...a bedroom...

16
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♪ Rico... ♪

17
00:00:34,904 --> 00:00:36,601
♪

18
00:00:39,225 --> 00:00:41,182
ADULT SHELDON: Even my train room had

19
00:00:41,185 --> 00:00:43,141
Georgie's sweaty weight bench in it.

20
00:00:43,144 --> 00:00:45,869
Come on, George. One more.

21
00:00:45,871 --> 00:00:47,741
Feel the burn, big boy.

22
00:00:47,743 --> 00:00:49,409
Feel the burn.

23
00:00:49,412 --> 00:00:53,191
But when it came to academics,
the spotlight was all mine.

24
00:00:53,194 --> 00:00:55,878
Sheldon, having you
here has been a real boon

25
00:00:55,881 --> 00:00:57,361
to this university.

26
00:00:58,230 --> 00:01:01,059
ADULT SHELDON: I did
love basking in its glow.

27
00:01:01,061 --> 00:01:03,104
So we could really use your help

28
00:01:03,106 --> 00:01:05,585
in raising the school's
profile even higher.

29
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Of course. My intellect
is at your service.

30
00:01:08,590 --> 00:01:09,763
Excellent.

31
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There is another young physics prodigy

32
00:01:11,680 --> 00:01:13,503
we want you to help us recruit.

33
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Her name is Paige Swanson.

34
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[electricity crackles]

35
00:01:18,066 --> 00:01:21,035
♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪

36
00:01:21,037 --> 00:01:24,212
♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪

37
00:01:24,214 --> 00:01:26,550
♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪

38
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♪ I am a mighty little man ♪

39
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- <font color="#D81D1D">Synced and corrected by VitoSilans</font> -
-- <font color="#138CE9">www.Addic7ed.com</font> --

40
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Why would you want Paige to come here?

41
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You know her?

42
00:01:38,881 --> 00:01:39,831
Oh, I know her.

43
00:01:39,834 --> 00:01:41,224
Ah. Wonderful.

44
00:01:41,227 --> 00:01:42,882
Just tell her how much
you love the school

45
00:01:42,885 --> 00:01:44,558
and convince her to enroll.

46
00:01:44,561 --> 00:01:46,191
But you don't need
another child prodigy.

47
00:01:46,193 --> 00:01:47,300
You've already got me.

48
00:01:47,303 --> 00:01:49,823
And you have been... [scoffs] so great.

49
00:01:49,826 --> 00:01:52,430
Just imagine what it'd
be like having two of you.

50
00:01:52,433 --> 00:01:54,112
Well, why would you want two of me?

51
00:01:54,114 --> 00:01:56,810
I mean, I've heard even one
of me is a lot to handle.

52
00:01:56,812 --> 00:01:59,639
Well, you're not afraid of a
little competition, are you?

53
00:01:59,641 --> 00:02:01,031
From Paige? Hardly.

54
00:02:01,033 --> 00:02:03,839
But I should warn you,
she can be very difficult.

55
00:02:03,842 --> 00:02:07,365
Well, luckily I've had some
practice with that lately.

56
00:02:07,368 --> 00:02:08,606
And how do you handle it?

57
00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:13,914
Usually I, uh, play to their egos.

58
00:02:13,916 --> 00:02:16,743
You know, make them feel like
the smartest person in the room.

59
00:02:16,745 --> 00:02:18,558
And they fall for that?

60
00:02:18,561 --> 00:02:20,126
Well... [chuckles]

61
00:02:20,129 --> 00:02:22,218
not everyone's as smart as you, Sheldon.

62
00:02:23,869 --> 00:02:26,959
Okay, have a great day. Love you.

63
00:02:27,925 --> 00:02:29,003
Love you, too.

64
00:02:29,005 --> 00:02:30,483
What are you doing?

65
00:02:30,485 --> 00:02:31,933
I learned it in baseball.

66
00:02:31,936 --> 00:02:34,555
When you don't want the other
team to see what you're saying.

67
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It's okay to love your mom.

68
00:02:37,013 --> 00:02:38,971
At home. Here, you get the hand.

69
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BRENDA: Hey, Mary.

70
00:02:42,339 --> 00:02:44,192
Oh, Brenda.

71
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Love the haircut.

72
00:02:45,587 --> 00:02:46,934
Thank you.

73
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I was always afraid to go short,

74
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but I figured I already lost a husband.

75
00:02:50,526 --> 00:02:52,058
What's a few inches off the top?

76
00:02:52,061 --> 00:02:54,507
Well, you look like a new person.

77
00:02:54,509 --> 00:02:56,117
I feel like a new person.

78
00:02:56,119 --> 00:02:57,249
I just needed to do

79
00:02:57,251 --> 00:02:58,598
something for me.

80
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It was either this or
get a tattoo on my thigh.

81
00:03:01,603 --> 00:03:03,951
I think you made the right choice.

82
00:03:03,953 --> 00:03:05,257
Well, I guess.

83
00:03:05,259 --> 00:03:07,174
I mean, who's seeing
me naked these days?

84
00:03:08,218 --> 00:03:09,915
Well, I wouldn't know.

85
00:03:11,961 --> 00:03:13,700
[dryer whirring]

86
00:03:13,702 --> 00:03:15,356
[door bells jingle]

87
00:03:17,401 --> 00:03:19,619
Hey, Mary. What are you doing here?

88
00:03:19,621 --> 00:03:21,708
I don't know. I was
just out running errands

89
00:03:21,710 --> 00:03:23,884
and thought maybe I'd
make an appointment.

90
00:03:23,886 --> 00:03:27,061
Well, chair's free now.
Come on, have a seat.

91
00:03:27,063 --> 00:03:29,846
Oh, um, o-okay. [chuckles]

92
00:03:29,848 --> 00:03:32,806
Okay. What can I do for you?

93
00:03:32,808 --> 00:03:35,591
Well, I guess I'm just
looking for a change.

94
00:03:35,593 --> 00:03:36,897
Uh-oh.

95
00:03:36,899 --> 00:03:38,768
What's "uh-oh"?

96
00:03:38,770 --> 00:03:40,988
Well, nothing, it's just,
when the women come in

97
00:03:40,990 --> 00:03:43,904
looking for a change, it's
usually relationship trouble.

98
00:03:43,906 --> 00:03:45,384
[laughs softly]: Oh...

99
00:03:45,386 --> 00:03:48,378
Well, not me. I'm fine.

100
00:03:48,381 --> 00:03:51,345
Okay, but I got a perm and
a divorce in the same week

101
00:03:51,348 --> 00:03:53,066
and I only regret one of them.

102
00:03:53,069 --> 00:03:54,372
[laughs]

103
00:03:54,375 --> 00:03:56,437
Maybe this is a bad
idea. I should come back.

104
00:03:56,440 --> 00:03:58,727
No, no, no, no. Come
on, you're already here.

105
00:03:58,730 --> 00:04:00,399
Either way, there's nothing wrong

106
00:04:00,401 --> 00:04:01,748
in a little change.

107
00:04:01,750 --> 00:04:03,402
Okay. Uh...

108
00:04:03,404 --> 00:04:05,317
What do you think I should do?

109
00:04:05,319 --> 00:04:07,580
Well, when you look at
yourself in the mirror,

110
00:04:07,582 --> 00:04:08,929
who do you see?

111
00:04:08,931 --> 00:04:14,108
I see a mom and... a wife.

112
00:04:14,110 --> 00:04:16,806
Okay, that's the hair you already got.

113
00:04:16,808 --> 00:04:18,939
Who do you want to see?

114
00:04:18,941 --> 00:04:20,812
Oh, um...

115
00:04:23,072 --> 00:04:24,898
Maybe we start with the nails.

116
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- That's a great idea.
- Yeah.

117
00:04:26,775 --> 00:04:29,823
So now I'm supposed to talk
Paige into coming to my school.

118
00:04:29,826 --> 00:04:31,385
Maybe it'll be nice to have somebody

119
00:04:31,388 --> 00:04:33,258
your own age to hang out with.

120
00:04:33,261 --> 00:04:34,781
Sure, so the next time someone says,

121
00:04:34,783 --> 00:04:36,435
"Hey, look what the kid
genius did," people will say,

122
00:04:36,437 --> 00:04:38,045
"Which one? There's so many."

123
00:04:38,047 --> 00:04:41,048
I thought you and that
little girl were friends.

124
00:04:41,050 --> 00:04:43,268
Missy's her friend. I'm her rival.

125
00:04:43,271 --> 00:04:45,710
Well, I think you're getting
worked up about nothing.

126
00:04:45,713 --> 00:04:48,837
Maybe she won't even decide
to come to this school.

127
00:04:48,840 --> 00:04:51,972
Oh, I see where you're going.

128
00:04:51,974 --> 00:04:53,969
I should convince her
it's a terrible school.

129
00:04:53,972 --> 00:04:54,975
That's brilliant.

130
00:04:54,977 --> 00:04:56,716
That's not where I was going.

131
00:04:56,718 --> 00:04:58,459
Too late, I'm already there.

132
00:05:04,029 --> 00:05:05,205
What are you doing?

133
00:05:06,293 --> 00:05:08,643
Look at me and tell me what you see.

134
00:05:09,644 --> 00:05:11,992
What?

135
00:05:11,994 --> 00:05:13,917
Did you get a haircut? Looks great.

136
00:05:13,920 --> 00:05:15,387
No, I didn't get a haircut.

137
00:05:15,389 --> 00:05:17,805
'Cause you don't need
one. Looking good, babe.

138
00:05:17,808 --> 00:05:19,042
Lord.

139
00:05:19,044 --> 00:05:22,524
Just tell me what you
see when you look at me.

140
00:05:22,526 --> 00:05:25,005
[sighs, mutters]

141
00:05:25,007 --> 00:05:28,182
I don't know what's going on,
but this feels like a trap.

142
00:05:28,184 --> 00:05:30,489
I went to the salon to get a haircut.

143
00:05:30,491 --> 00:05:32,339
Knew it, looking foxy.

144
00:05:32,342 --> 00:05:36,233
But I didn't get one because
I don't know what I want.

145
00:05:36,236 --> 00:05:38,192
[quietly]: Oh.

146
00:05:38,194 --> 00:05:40,987
You know who's got good
hair? Charlene Tilton.

147
00:05:40,990 --> 00:05:42,144
Who?

148
00:05:42,147 --> 00:05:43,850
That little blonde one on Dallas.

149
00:05:43,852 --> 00:05:45,895
People make a fuss
over Victoria Principal,

150
00:05:45,897 --> 00:05:47,089
but Charlene Tilton...

151
00:05:47,092 --> 00:05:48,620
You're not helping me, George.

152
00:05:50,685 --> 00:05:52,513
I knew this was a trap.

153
00:05:53,603 --> 00:05:56,313
I must tell you that
Sheldon was very excited

154
00:05:56,316 --> 00:05:58,343
to hear that you might be joining us.

155
00:05:58,345 --> 00:05:59,735
Well, isn't he sweet?

156
00:05:59,737 --> 00:06:01,073
He's a peach.

157
00:06:01,076 --> 00:06:03,347
All right, I'm here. Hello, hello.

158
00:06:03,350 --> 00:06:04,784
Hello.

159
00:06:04,786 --> 00:06:06,870
Hi, Sheldon. I'm so excited for you

160
00:06:06,873 --> 00:06:08,353
to show me around campus today.

161
00:06:08,355 --> 00:06:10,008
The only reason I'm
doing it is because...

162
00:06:10,011 --> 00:06:12,313
He's excited to do it,
I'm excited he's doing it.

163
00:06:12,315 --> 00:06:13,847
- Are you excited?
- Sure.

164
00:06:13,850 --> 00:06:15,362
Everyone's excited. Yay.

165
00:06:16,667 --> 00:06:18,537
[sighs] Come on, let's go.

166
00:06:18,539 --> 00:06:21,627
You and me, together again.

167
00:06:21,629 --> 00:06:23,106
It just feels right, doesn't it?

168
00:06:23,108 --> 00:06:24,284
[grumbles]

169
00:06:25,328 --> 00:06:26,893
There's the cafeteria.

170
00:06:26,895 --> 00:06:29,287
If you like tuna salad with hair in it.

171
00:06:29,289 --> 00:06:31,637
Over there is the quad.
It's a nice place to relax,

172
00:06:31,639 --> 00:06:33,856
if you like getting hit
in the head with Frisbees.

173
00:06:33,858 --> 00:06:35,858
- I know what you're doing.
- No, you don't.

174
00:06:35,860 --> 00:06:37,469
You have nothing to worry about.

175
00:06:37,471 --> 00:06:39,253
I don't want to come to this school.

176
00:06:39,255 --> 00:06:40,907
I'm just looking at
it to make my mom happy

177
00:06:40,909 --> 00:06:42,125
since it's close to home.

178
00:06:42,127 --> 00:06:43,917
Well, that's wonderful news.

179
00:06:43,920 --> 00:06:46,738
Besides, I've got offers
from way better universities.

180
00:06:46,741 --> 00:06:49,437
What do you mean? What's
wrong with this school?

181
00:06:49,439 --> 00:06:51,396
It's fine. It's just
nowhere near as good

182
00:06:51,398 --> 00:06:52,919
as Harvard or Columbia.

183
00:06:52,921 --> 00:06:54,834
It is too.

184
00:06:54,836 --> 00:06:57,367
If you like a substandard
science department

185
00:06:57,370 --> 00:06:58,838
and hair in your tuna.

186
00:06:58,840 --> 00:07:01,362
["Sad Eyes" by Robert John playing]

187
00:07:01,364 --> 00:07:04,757
ADULT SHELDON: Paige had made
me look at East Texas Tech

188
00:07:04,759 --> 00:07:06,933
in a whole new light.

189
00:07:06,935 --> 00:07:08,789
♪ Looks like it's over ♪

190
00:07:08,792 --> 00:07:11,641
♪ You knew I couldn't stay ♪

191
00:07:11,644 --> 00:07:13,374
[seat creaking]

192
00:07:13,376 --> 00:07:17,337
♪ Why must you look at me that way? ♪

193
00:07:19,207 --> 00:07:22,166
♪ It's over ♪

194
00:07:25,780 --> 00:07:28,476
♪ Sad eyes ♪

195
00:07:28,478 --> 00:07:30,130
Of course.

196
00:07:30,132 --> 00:07:32,611
♪ You knew there'd come a day ♪

197
00:07:32,613 --> 00:07:38,053
♪ When we would have to say goodbye. ♪

198
00:07:44,179 --> 00:07:46,808
She said she doesn't even want
to come to this university.

199
00:07:46,811 --> 00:07:48,594
Well, I hope you
convinced her otherwise.

200
00:07:48,597 --> 00:07:50,995
She said she'd rather go
to Harvard or Columbia.

201
00:07:50,998 --> 00:07:53,198
[scoffs] T-Those are all
perfectly fine schools,

202
00:07:53,201 --> 00:07:55,105
but we have a lot to offer here, too.

203
00:07:55,108 --> 00:07:56,890
I told her that, but
she said I was settling

204
00:07:56,893 --> 00:07:58,605
because I want to
live close to my mommy.

205
00:07:58,608 --> 00:07:59,878
Well, that's ridiculous.

206
00:07:59,881 --> 00:08:02,204
That's why I came here to tell on her.

207
00:08:02,207 --> 00:08:05,861
Well, the important thing is
you're here and you're happy.

208
00:08:05,863 --> 00:08:07,698
I thought I was, but why does Paige

209
00:08:07,701 --> 00:08:09,693
get to go to a better school than me?

210
00:08:10,650 --> 00:08:12,519
Hey, I know what'll solve your problem.

211
00:08:12,522 --> 00:08:14,479
Convince Paige to come here.

212
00:08:14,481 --> 00:08:16,437
Yeah. Wait.

213
00:08:16,439 --> 00:08:19,870
Sometimes I think George
doesn't even see me.

214
00:08:19,873 --> 00:08:21,292
And it's not just him.

215
00:08:21,295 --> 00:08:23,050
My daughter's embarrassed of me,

216
00:08:23,053 --> 00:08:26,519
my boys think all I'm good
for is food and clean clothes.

217
00:08:26,522 --> 00:08:28,206
You start feeling like a ghost, right?

218
00:08:28,209 --> 00:08:29,121
Yes.

219
00:08:29,124 --> 00:08:30,602
I get it, I'm a mom.

220
00:08:30,605 --> 00:08:33,780
[sighs] So did that
feeling ever go away?

221
00:08:33,783 --> 00:08:34,776
Yeah.

222
00:08:34,779 --> 00:08:38,409
I realized I was doing
everything for everyone else,

223
00:08:38,412 --> 00:08:40,717
and I didn't have anything left for me.

224
00:08:40,720 --> 00:08:42,939
So, here we are.

225
00:08:44,254 --> 00:08:47,777
When I was younger, I used
to love making my own clothes.

226
00:08:47,779 --> 00:08:49,170
- Mm-hmm.
- I always thought I'd do

227
00:08:49,172 --> 00:08:50,650
something with that.

228
00:08:50,652 --> 00:08:52,391
Maybe I should get back to it.

229
00:08:52,393 --> 00:08:54,102
You definitely should.

230
00:08:54,105 --> 00:08:55,481
Okay.

231
00:08:55,483 --> 00:08:58,223
Okay. So, what are we thinking?

232
00:08:58,225 --> 00:09:02,618
Actually, I don't think
I need a haircut anymore.

233
00:09:02,620 --> 00:09:04,446
Thank you so much.

234
00:09:04,448 --> 00:09:06,274
Oh, my pleasure.

235
00:09:06,276 --> 00:09:07,667
[chuckles]

236
00:09:07,669 --> 00:09:11,586
I got to start charging by the hour.

237
00:09:16,591 --> 00:09:18,112
What are you doing?

238
00:09:18,114 --> 00:09:19,592
I'm sewing.

239
00:09:19,594 --> 00:09:20,941
Why?

240
00:09:20,943 --> 00:09:23,030
Because it's a thing I like to do.

241
00:09:23,032 --> 00:09:25,119
I ain't never seen you sew.

242
00:09:25,121 --> 00:09:26,947
Well, you're seeing it now.

243
00:09:26,949 --> 00:09:28,601
What you making?

244
00:09:28,603 --> 00:09:30,387
A dress for Missy.

245
00:09:31,432 --> 00:09:33,301
Did you lose your job?

246
00:09:33,303 --> 00:09:34,433
No.

247
00:09:34,435 --> 00:09:36,217
Did Dad lose his job?

248
00:09:36,219 --> 00:09:39,481
It's about me doing
something for myself.

249
00:09:39,483 --> 00:09:41,309
All right, don't get sassy.

250
00:09:41,311 --> 00:09:42,312
GEORGE SR.: Hey.

251
00:09:44,140 --> 00:09:45,444
What's going on in here?

252
00:09:45,446 --> 00:09:47,794
She's making clothes for Missy.

253
00:09:47,796 --> 00:09:49,622
Uh-oh. Did you lose your job?

254
00:09:49,624 --> 00:09:50,723
No.

255
00:09:50,726 --> 00:09:52,771
She's doing something for her.

256
00:09:54,026 --> 00:09:55,673
[whispers]: I don't get it, either.

257
00:09:57,409 --> 00:09:58,805
SHELDON: Ooh, maybe I'll transfer

258
00:09:58,807 --> 00:10:00,459
to the University of Zurich.

259
00:10:00,461 --> 00:10:02,200
I thought you liked your school.

260
00:10:02,202 --> 00:10:04,376
I did, until Paige ruined it.

261
00:10:04,378 --> 00:10:05,855
Why do you care what she thinks?

262
00:10:05,857 --> 00:10:06,900
I don't.

263
00:10:06,902 --> 00:10:08,554
Sure sounds like you do.

264
00:10:08,556 --> 00:10:11,644
I can't help it. She makes me crazy.

265
00:10:11,646 --> 00:10:13,167
Then stop thinking about her.

266
00:10:13,169 --> 00:10:14,342
I wish I could.

267
00:10:14,344 --> 00:10:16,781
Ooh, maybe you have a crush on her.

268
00:10:17,826 --> 00:10:18,999
That's ridiculous.

269
00:10:19,001 --> 00:10:20,653
I don't know.

270
00:10:20,655 --> 00:10:21,886
I don't.

271
00:10:21,889 --> 00:10:25,042
You care what she thinks, you
can't stop talking about her.

272
00:10:25,045 --> 00:10:26,477
I don't have a crush on her!

273
00:10:26,480 --> 00:10:27,747
Are you sure?

274
00:10:27,749 --> 00:10:29,185
I don't know!

275
00:10:35,541 --> 00:10:37,715
Okay, here we go.

276
00:10:37,718 --> 00:10:41,325
"Is it a crush? Take this
juicy quiz and find out.

277
00:10:41,328 --> 00:10:43,714
Do you think about them
when they're not around?"

278
00:10:43,717 --> 00:10:44,980
Lately, yes.

279
00:10:44,983 --> 00:10:47,896
"Are you jealous when other
people give them attention?"

280
00:10:47,899 --> 00:10:49,433
I suppose I am.

281
00:10:49,436 --> 00:10:51,218
"Do you get nervous
when you're around them?"

282
00:10:51,221 --> 00:10:54,440
How could I not? Last time
she punched me, in the face.

283
00:10:54,443 --> 00:10:56,051
That was so great.

284
00:10:56,054 --> 00:10:57,880
"Do you talk about them all the time?"

285
00:10:57,883 --> 00:10:59,667
That's a big fat yes.

286
00:10:59,670 --> 00:11:01,472
"Do you dream about them?"

287
00:11:01,475 --> 00:11:03,388
Oh, dear.

288
00:11:03,391 --> 00:11:05,238
Just last night I had a
nightmare that she solved

289
00:11:05,240 --> 00:11:07,414
the Einstein field
equations ahead of me.

290
00:11:07,417 --> 00:11:09,222
That's five out of five.

291
00:11:09,225 --> 00:11:11,972
"You're crushing harder
than Zack on Kelly Kapowski."

292
00:11:11,975 --> 00:11:14,167
Uh, what does that mean?

293
00:11:14,170 --> 00:11:16,620
Trust me, that's a big deal.

294
00:11:16,623 --> 00:11:19,620
ADULT SHELDON: My sister had
gotten into my head, but I needed

295
00:11:19,623 --> 00:11:22,792
a more reliable opinion
than a magazine that included

296
00:11:22,795 --> 00:11:25,448
the Hottest Tips for Pouty Lips.

297
00:11:25,451 --> 00:11:26,632
Georgie?

298
00:11:26,634 --> 00:11:27,847
What?

299
00:11:27,850 --> 00:11:30,373
Can I ask you a question about girls?

300
00:11:30,376 --> 00:11:33,159
Go ahead, but I find
them very confusing.

301
00:11:33,162 --> 00:11:35,554
Missy thinks I have a crush on Paige.

302
00:11:35,557 --> 00:11:37,164
Do you?

303
00:11:37,166 --> 00:11:40,136
I don't know, but I know
that I don't want to.

304
00:11:40,139 --> 00:11:42,705
Well, you don't get to choose.

305
00:11:42,708 --> 00:11:44,316
It's just something you feel.

306
00:11:44,319 --> 00:11:46,580
Did you have a crush on your girlfriend?

307
00:11:46,583 --> 00:11:48,148
Yeah, I guess.

308
00:11:48,151 --> 00:11:49,846
How did you know when you did?

309
00:11:49,849 --> 00:11:52,633
Well, one day she came to
school in these soccer shorts,

310
00:11:52,636 --> 00:11:54,157
and that was it.

311
00:11:54,160 --> 00:11:56,378
What happened, you
played soccer with her?

312
00:11:56,381 --> 00:11:57,558
No, dummy.

313
00:11:57,561 --> 00:11:59,800
Then what was the
significance of the shorts?

314
00:12:00,656 --> 00:12:02,264
I don't think I can help you.

315
00:12:02,267 --> 00:12:03,527
Fine, I'll ask Dad.

316
00:12:03,530 --> 00:12:04,651
Good luck. The only thing

317
00:12:04,654 --> 00:12:06,306
he has a crush on is beer.

318
00:12:06,309 --> 00:12:08,483
ADULT SHELDON: I wasn't
getting the help I needed,

319
00:12:08,486 --> 00:12:11,839
so I turned to the
smartest resource I knew.

320
00:12:11,842 --> 00:12:14,234
Love is a funny thing.

321
00:12:14,237 --> 00:12:16,964
They say, "The heart wants
what the heart wants,"

322
00:12:16,967 --> 00:12:18,880
but I think it should be,

323
00:12:18,883 --> 00:12:22,972
"The limbic system wants
what the limbic system wants."

324
00:12:22,975 --> 00:12:25,261
Finally, someone's making sense.

325
00:12:25,264 --> 00:12:29,276
Well, not to brag, but when
it comes to unrequited love,

326
00:12:29,279 --> 00:12:31,453
I'm kind of an expert.

327
00:12:31,455 --> 00:12:34,326
Well, when I talk to Paige,
all she does is drive me crazy.

328
00:12:34,328 --> 00:12:38,460
There's a thin line between
affection and aggravation.

329
00:12:38,462 --> 00:12:40,941
The Roman poet Catullus said,

330
00:12:40,943 --> 00:12:45,554
"I hate and I love and I know not why."

331
00:12:45,556 --> 00:12:47,472
I'm not sure what to make of that.

332
00:12:47,475 --> 00:12:49,689
Perhaps it'd be more useful in Latin.

333
00:12:49,691 --> 00:12:51,386
"Odi et amo..."

334
00:12:51,388 --> 00:12:53,191
I just want to know if I have a crush.

335
00:12:53,194 --> 00:12:55,109
Well, does your heart rate elevate

336
00:12:55,112 --> 00:12:56,654
when you're in her presence?

337
00:12:57,371 --> 00:12:58,441
I suppose.

338
00:12:58,444 --> 00:13:00,742
Does your stomach flutter?

339
00:13:00,745 --> 00:13:02,571
Yes.

340
00:13:02,573 --> 00:13:06,488
Sounds like your limbic system
might be doing its thing.

341
00:13:06,490 --> 00:13:08,492
Oh, dear.

342
00:13:10,360 --> 00:13:12,969
- Hey.
- Hey.

343
00:13:12,972 --> 00:13:14,842
That's a lot of fabric.

344
00:13:14,845 --> 00:13:16,406
Oh, it's not just fabric.

345
00:13:16,409 --> 00:13:19,068
I also got pattern books
and an accessory kit.

346
00:13:20,784 --> 00:13:22,823
Can I ask how much that all cost?

347
00:13:22,826 --> 00:13:25,332
Well, it's hard to say,
because in the long run

348
00:13:25,335 --> 00:13:27,030
I'm gonna save us money.

349
00:13:27,032 --> 00:13:29,946
Well, what did it cost in the short run?

350
00:13:29,948 --> 00:13:31,714
I don't know, a hundred dollars?

351
00:13:31,717 --> 00:13:35,545
A hundred dollars?
What is wrong with you?

352
00:13:35,548 --> 00:13:37,253
Why would you say that?

353
00:13:37,256 --> 00:13:38,952
That is a good question.

354
00:13:38,955 --> 00:13:41,087
I mean, what is wrong with you?

355
00:13:41,090 --> 00:13:42,839
Why is it okay when you say it?

356
00:13:42,842 --> 00:13:45,092
'Cause clearly there's
something wrong with you.

357
00:13:45,094 --> 00:13:47,050
So you think it's fine that she spent

358
00:13:47,052 --> 00:13:48,995
a hundred dollars on thread?

359
00:13:48,998 --> 00:13:51,987
I think it's fine that she has
something that makes her happy.

360
00:13:54,019 --> 00:13:55,149
What are you looking for?

361
00:13:55,152 --> 00:13:56,414
Anybody but you.

362
00:13:57,215 --> 00:13:58,998
Look, I get it.

363
00:13:59,001 --> 00:14:02,717
One time, Darlene got
all into scrapbooking.

364
00:14:02,720 --> 00:14:05,547
Overnight, our den became
her scrapbooking room.

365
00:14:05,549 --> 00:14:06,753
What did you do?

366
00:14:06,756 --> 00:14:08,724
I said, "Whatever
makes you happy, dear,"

367
00:14:08,726 --> 00:14:10,944
and made love to her in
the scrapbooking room.

368
00:14:10,946 --> 00:14:12,121
Ha.

369
00:14:13,383 --> 00:14:14,776
[exhales]

370
00:14:14,779 --> 00:14:17,476
Maybe if you had three kids,
you'd worry more about money.

371
00:14:17,479 --> 00:14:19,783
Oh, we can't wait to have babies.

372
00:14:19,786 --> 00:14:22,998
I just love the way
their little heads smell.

373
00:14:23,001 --> 00:14:26,264
Does anybody in here
want to be my friend?

374
00:14:26,266 --> 00:14:28,178
Anybody?

375
00:14:28,180 --> 00:14:31,534
Look, Sheldon, you're not
gonna convince me to come here.

376
00:14:31,537 --> 00:14:32,878
You're wasting your time.

377
00:14:32,881 --> 00:14:34,229
[sighs]

378
00:14:34,232 --> 00:14:36,928
I'm afraid we have a bigger problem.

379
00:14:36,931 --> 00:14:38,713
What are you talking about?

380
00:14:38,716 --> 00:14:40,538
[sighs]

381
00:14:40,541 --> 00:14:42,933
I'm a scientist, and I
have to follow the data

382
00:14:42,936 --> 00:14:45,617
wherever it leads,
whether I like it or not.

383
00:14:45,620 --> 00:14:47,492
Get to the point.

384
00:14:49,376 --> 00:14:51,593
It seems I have a crush on you.

385
00:14:51,595 --> 00:14:52,986
What?

386
00:14:52,988 --> 00:14:54,683
I'm as surprised as you are.

387
00:14:54,686 --> 00:14:57,073
But I have all the symptoms
according to both Dr. Sturgis

388
00:14:57,076 --> 00:14:59,296
and the editors of Sassy magazine.

389
00:15:04,478 --> 00:15:07,217
Uh, Sheldon,

390
00:15:07,219 --> 00:15:09,655
I'm really glad that you told me this,

391
00:15:09,657 --> 00:15:14,790
'cause... the truth is, I
feel the same way about you.

392
00:15:14,792 --> 00:15:16,270
You do?

393
00:15:16,272 --> 00:15:17,941
I mean, I've been trying to hide it,

394
00:15:17,944 --> 00:15:20,336
but now I don't have to anymore.

395
00:15:20,339 --> 00:15:22,362
This is such a relief.

396
00:15:22,365 --> 00:15:25,058
Oh, dear. This is new information.

397
00:15:25,061 --> 00:15:26,672
I had been operating
under the assumption

398
00:15:26,674 --> 00:15:28,543
that my crush was unrequited.

399
00:15:28,545 --> 00:15:32,191
Oh, it's requited,
Sheldon. It's very requited.

400
00:15:32,194 --> 00:15:33,620
Hmm.

401
00:15:37,641 --> 00:15:39,337
What are you doing?

402
00:15:39,339 --> 00:15:40,990
We have a crush on each other.

403
00:15:40,992 --> 00:15:42,165
So?

404
00:15:42,167 --> 00:15:44,429
Well, now we have to kiss.

405
00:15:44,431 --> 00:15:45,908
We do?

406
00:15:45,910 --> 00:15:48,957
I mean, it's where the data has led us.

407
00:15:51,351 --> 00:15:53,176
I suppose.

408
00:15:53,178 --> 00:15:54,792
Okay.

409
00:15:54,795 --> 00:15:56,971
Now close your eyes and pucker up.

410
00:16:03,136 --> 00:16:04,963
This might tickle.

411
00:16:08,455 --> 00:16:10,019
What's happening? Are we kissing?

412
00:16:10,021 --> 00:16:11,458
You bet.

413
00:16:14,542 --> 00:16:15,851
How was that?

414
00:16:15,853 --> 00:16:18,089
I didn't feel anything romantic.

415
00:16:18,092 --> 00:16:20,398
Hmm. Me, either.

416
00:16:22,059 --> 00:16:23,972
I guess it wasn't a crush after all.

417
00:16:23,975 --> 00:16:25,512
I guess not.

418
00:16:25,515 --> 00:16:28,386
Hmm. That's a relief.

419
00:16:28,388 --> 00:16:29,901
It is.

420
00:16:29,904 --> 00:16:33,159
ADULT SHELDON: I went to three
classes before I figured it out.

421
00:16:33,162 --> 00:16:35,401
Good thing I look spiffy in a mustache.

422
00:16:38,823 --> 00:16:41,888
- [door bells jingle]
- Hi.

423
00:16:41,891 --> 00:16:44,456
Oh. Three days in a row.

424
00:16:44,459 --> 00:16:46,980
If you were a man, I'd think
you was in love with me.

425
00:16:46,983 --> 00:16:50,167
Well, this time I'm
actually gonna get a haircut.

426
00:16:50,170 --> 00:16:52,431
I had a little accident.

427
00:16:52,434 --> 00:16:54,608
Uh-oh, what happened?

428
00:16:54,611 --> 00:16:58,050
Well, I was sewing and
got to daydreaming...

429
00:17:00,724 --> 00:17:02,726
♪

430
00:17:04,035 --> 00:17:05,382
MISSY: I love it.

431
00:17:05,385 --> 00:17:07,566
You can make all my clothes from now on.

432
00:17:07,569 --> 00:17:09,049
♪

433
00:17:09,903 --> 00:17:12,077
I'm-a wear this to the prom.

434
00:17:12,080 --> 00:17:14,980
I was wrong, honey, you
really are good at this.

435
00:17:14,983 --> 00:17:17,113
Boy, am I dumb.

436
00:17:17,116 --> 00:17:18,811
[sewing machine clacking]

437
00:17:18,814 --> 00:17:20,989
MARY: George!

438
00:17:20,992 --> 00:17:23,004
George! Help!

439
00:17:23,007 --> 00:17:24,034
GEORGE SR.: What?

440
00:17:24,037 --> 00:17:26,730
- What's the matter?
- My hair got tangled in the machine.

441
00:17:26,733 --> 00:17:28,385
So pull it out.

442
00:17:28,388 --> 00:17:30,258
Don't you think I thought of that?!

443
00:17:30,261 --> 00:17:32,217
Well, what do you want me to do?

444
00:17:32,220 --> 00:17:33,683
All right, don't move.

445
00:17:34,847 --> 00:17:36,760
And here we are.

446
00:17:36,763 --> 00:17:40,374
Okay. Let's get that hat off
and see what we're dealing with.

447
00:17:40,377 --> 00:17:42,855
- I don't want to.
- Oh, come on.

448
00:17:42,858 --> 00:17:44,425
I've been doing this a long time.

449
00:17:44,428 --> 00:17:46,341
I promise you I've seen worse.

450
00:17:46,344 --> 00:17:48,303
Oh...

451
00:17:51,076 --> 00:17:53,698
That's not bad at all.

452
00:17:56,191 --> 00:18:01,875
- <font color="#D81D1D">Synced and corrected by VitoSilans</font> -
-- <font color="#138CE9">www.Addic7ed.com</font> --

