1 00:00:03,046 --> 00:00:05,340 - Abigail Baker? - Here. 2 00:00:05,423 --> 00:00:07,467 - Georgie Cooper? - Here. 3 00:00:07,550 --> 00:00:09,052 Sheldon Cooper? 4 00:00:11,596 --> 00:00:14,724 - Georgie, where's your brother? - I don't know. 5 00:00:15,308 --> 00:00:17,477 Good enough for me. Melissa Dixon? 6 00:00:26,736 --> 00:00:29,822 Since I no longer had a college class with Dr. Sturgis 7 00:00:29,906 --> 00:00:32,116 to stoke my intellectual fire, 8 00:00:32,200 --> 00:00:36,454 I needed to find someone else who was up to the task of being my mentor. 9 00:00:36,538 --> 00:00:40,833 A great mind, a once-in-a-generation thinker. 10 00:00:40,917 --> 00:00:44,587 Fortunately, my schedule was wide open. 11 00:00:53,429 --> 00:00:54,847 School's in session. 12 00:00:55,974 --> 00:00:59,227 ♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪ 13 00:00:59,310 --> 00:01:01,771 ♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪ 14 00:01:01,854 --> 00:01:04,566 ♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪ 15 00:01:04,649 --> 00:01:07,485 ♪ I am a mighty little man ♪ 16 00:01:07,569 --> 00:01:11,656 ♪ I am a mighty little man ♪ 17 00:01:16,327 --> 00:01:18,204 Pastor Jeff, I just need your signature... 18 00:01:18,788 --> 00:01:21,207 Oh, sorry. I didn't realize you had a guest. 19 00:01:21,291 --> 00:01:25,753 - It's all right, you remember Robin? - Of course. So nice to see you again. 20 00:01:25,837 --> 00:01:27,589 - You too. - I don't wanna interrupt. 21 00:01:27,672 --> 00:01:30,133 Actually, I was just fixing to head out. 22 00:01:30,216 --> 00:01:32,885 - Already? - Yeah, discharged my firearm 23 00:01:32,969 --> 00:01:35,847 at a muskrat yesterday, a lot of paperwork. 24 00:01:37,015 --> 00:01:37,973 See you soon? 25 00:01:37,974 --> 00:01:39,976 Yes, you will. 26 00:01:40,059 --> 00:01:42,020 - Bye, Mrs. Cooper. - Bye. 27 00:01:43,438 --> 00:01:45,398 That seems to be going well. 28 00:01:45,481 --> 00:01:48,943 It's going really well. I like her so much. 29 00:01:49,027 --> 00:01:51,070 Why do you sound sad about it? 30 00:01:51,821 --> 00:01:54,907 Well, this is hard for me to say out loud... 31 00:01:58,620 --> 00:02:01,873 but when I'm around her, I find myself having... 32 00:02:03,082 --> 00:02:04,626 you know. 33 00:02:04,709 --> 00:02:05,709 I don't know. 34 00:02:07,795 --> 00:02:08,796 Man thoughts. 35 00:02:08,880 --> 00:02:13,384 Oh, but you're the pastor, you can't act on those. 36 00:02:13,468 --> 00:02:15,428 Hence my sadness. 37 00:02:15,511 --> 00:02:17,722 - What are you gonna do? - I'm not sure. 38 00:02:17,805 --> 00:02:21,434 I can't engage in a physical relationship outside of holy matrimony. 39 00:02:23,144 --> 00:02:24,102 - Right? - Right. 40 00:02:24,103 --> 00:02:25,103 Right. 41 00:02:31,986 --> 00:02:36,282 "A solution is a homogenous mixture consisting of a solute and a solvent. 42 00:02:36,366 --> 00:02:39,869 The solute is the substance that is being dissolved..." 43 00:02:43,039 --> 00:02:46,417 A squared plus B squared equals? 44 00:02:54,509 --> 00:02:55,718 Aw... 45 00:02:57,261 --> 00:03:00,098 And Pastor Jeff asked me to hold him accountable 46 00:03:00,181 --> 00:03:03,017 so he doesn't succumb to temptation. 47 00:03:03,101 --> 00:03:05,687 - How the heck do you do that? - I'm not sure. 48 00:03:05,770 --> 00:03:08,981 Probably have to give him the stink-eye every so often. 49 00:03:10,692 --> 00:03:12,860 Pastor's been married before, is it that big a deal? 50 00:03:12,944 --> 00:03:15,780 Yes, George, it states very clearly in the Bible: 51 00:03:15,863 --> 00:03:19,742 "Among you, there must not be even a hint of... 52 00:03:19,826 --> 00:03:22,203 sexual immorality." 53 00:03:22,286 --> 00:03:24,205 That book is a bummer sometimes. 54 00:03:24,288 --> 00:03:26,749 It's no joke. He could lose his job. 55 00:03:26,833 --> 00:03:27,917 I guess I don't get it. 56 00:03:28,000 --> 00:03:30,628 Maybe because you only go to church when there's a bake sale. 57 00:03:30,712 --> 00:03:32,130 - That's not nice. - It's true. 58 00:03:32,213 --> 00:03:33,464 Doesn't make it nice. 59 00:03:47,645 --> 00:03:51,357 - Everything all right with Sheldon? - How much time you got? Why? 60 00:03:51,441 --> 00:03:54,694 - Haven't been in P.E. since Monday. - Really? 61 00:03:54,777 --> 00:03:56,154 He's here, I drove him. 62 00:03:56,863 --> 00:03:58,656 You check the places they like to stuff him? 63 00:03:58,740 --> 00:04:00,950 Lockers, trash cans, 64 00:04:01,033 --> 00:04:04,245 those bags we put the footballs in. Nothing. 65 00:04:04,328 --> 00:04:05,955 - Top of the flagpole. - Nope. 66 00:04:09,709 --> 00:04:14,172 - Hey, Hubert, was Sheldon in class today? - No, haven't seen him all week. 67 00:04:14,255 --> 00:04:16,883 - Weren't you gonna say anything? - I didn't wanna jinx it. 68 00:04:20,428 --> 00:04:22,513 So he hasn't been in any of your classes? 69 00:04:22,597 --> 00:04:23,973 - No. - Not a one. 70 00:04:24,056 --> 00:04:28,019 But I bring him here, I take him home, he's gotta be somewhere in the building. 71 00:04:28,102 --> 00:04:30,521 I might've seen him in the library, but at this point, 72 00:04:30,605 --> 00:04:33,149 I sometimes think I see him when I'm alone in my house. 73 00:04:33,232 --> 00:04:35,818 - Like the creepy Chucky doll in the movies? - Ha, ha! 74 00:04:35,902 --> 00:04:37,195 Exactly. 75 00:04:41,991 --> 00:04:43,367 Hey, Tam. 76 00:04:43,910 --> 00:04:46,662 I can't find Sheldon, you know where he is? 77 00:04:46,746 --> 00:04:49,499 - I promised not to say. - Tam. 78 00:04:49,582 --> 00:04:50,833 Lucky for you, I'm weak. 79 00:04:52,585 --> 00:04:55,463 - Are you kidding me? - I knew Tam was weak. 80 00:04:55,546 --> 00:04:57,006 What do you think you're doing? 81 00:04:57,089 --> 00:05:01,677 Exploring the impact of the French invasion on Imperial Russian society. 82 00:05:01,761 --> 00:05:04,222 Well, get out of here. You're going back to class. 83 00:05:04,305 --> 00:05:05,932 No, I'm not. 84 00:05:06,015 --> 00:05:06,973 Excuse me? 85 00:05:06,974 --> 00:05:08,726 I don't learn anything in class. 86 00:05:08,810 --> 00:05:12,355 But in here, I've taught myself the applications of gravitational lensing, 87 00:05:12,438 --> 00:05:15,358 Faraday's law of magnetic induction, and how to whistle. 88 00:05:16,901 --> 00:05:18,778 Well, sound came out yesterday. 89 00:05:18,861 --> 00:05:21,239 You can't spend your day in a broom closet. 90 00:05:21,322 --> 00:05:25,326 It's no longer a broom closet, it's now a citadel of higher learning. 91 00:05:33,584 --> 00:05:36,254 Which one says, "Robin, I like you"? 92 00:05:36,337 --> 00:05:39,632 But also says, "God is watching, be cool"? 93 00:05:39,715 --> 00:05:40,925 The blue one. 94 00:05:41,634 --> 00:05:43,803 Mary, your husband's on the line. 95 00:05:43,886 --> 00:05:47,223 - Excuse me. - Yeah, blue. Definitely blue. 96 00:05:48,933 --> 00:05:50,643 - Although... - Everything okay? 97 00:05:50,726 --> 00:05:54,230 Sheldon locked himself in a broom closet and he's refusing to go to class. 98 00:05:54,313 --> 00:05:56,065 What's he doing in a closet? 99 00:05:56,148 --> 00:05:58,109 Apparently learning about Russia. 100 00:05:58,192 --> 00:06:01,070 - Well, what do you want me to do? - I want you to handle it. 101 00:06:01,153 --> 00:06:03,155 You're right there, why can't you handle it? 102 00:06:03,239 --> 00:06:04,532 Because I'm at work. 103 00:06:04,615 --> 00:06:06,909 - So am I. - You know what I mean. 104 00:06:06,993 --> 00:06:08,828 That you have a real job and I don't? 105 00:06:08,911 --> 00:06:13,541 Mary, I have football practice in 10 minutes, and I... I don't have time to deal with this. 106 00:06:13,624 --> 00:06:16,294 Well, you're gonna have to, because I'm busy. 107 00:06:17,628 --> 00:06:19,130 You tell him, sister. 108 00:06:20,840 --> 00:06:22,675 The bolo tie's too sexy, right? 109 00:06:24,552 --> 00:06:25,595 Knew it. 110 00:06:26,345 --> 00:06:29,473 Hope you're happy, your mother and I are fighting now. 111 00:06:33,060 --> 00:06:37,481 There's a closet, my son made a citadel... Never mind. 112 00:06:43,070 --> 00:06:45,072 - Sheldon, go to your room. - Gladly. 113 00:06:45,156 --> 00:06:47,992 He's just gonna read in there, I'd take away Professor Proton. 114 00:06:48,075 --> 00:06:49,118 Stay out of this. 115 00:06:51,078 --> 00:06:53,581 - And no more Professor Proton. - Aw! 116 00:06:53,664 --> 00:06:55,124 That's how you do it. 117 00:06:55,207 --> 00:06:57,293 I can't believe you didn't make him go to class. 118 00:06:57,376 --> 00:06:59,128 You told me to handle it, I handled it. 119 00:06:59,211 --> 00:07:01,005 That one's on you. 120 00:07:01,088 --> 00:07:03,299 You didn't handle it, you didn't do anything. 121 00:07:03,382 --> 00:07:05,843 I had to get to practice, and I made a decision. 122 00:07:05,927 --> 00:07:08,721 He was in the building, he was safe, and he was learning. 123 00:07:08,804 --> 00:07:12,475 He is never gonna improve his social skills if he's sitting all alone. 124 00:07:12,558 --> 00:07:15,269 - He has to be around people. - Sounds like you know what he needs. 125 00:07:15,353 --> 00:07:18,230 - Go fix it. - Because I have to do everything, right? 126 00:07:18,314 --> 00:07:21,192 Whoa, someone's sleeping on the couch tonight. 127 00:07:21,275 --> 00:07:22,610 Get out of here. 128 00:07:23,361 --> 00:07:25,112 Well, maybe Sheldon's just acting out 129 00:07:25,196 --> 00:07:28,240 because he doesn't have his college class to go to anymore. 130 00:07:28,324 --> 00:07:32,328 I could ask John's professor friend, maybe he'd let him sit in on a class. 131 00:07:32,411 --> 00:07:34,538 And you are just bringing this up now? 132 00:07:34,622 --> 00:07:37,750 I would've said something earlier, but I was enjoying the fight. 133 00:07:44,006 --> 00:07:46,050 - Hello? - Hi, Dr. Linkletter. 134 00:07:46,133 --> 00:07:49,720 - It's Connie Tucker. - Connie, to what do I owe the pleasure? 135 00:07:49,804 --> 00:07:50,846 I need a favor. 136 00:07:50,930 --> 00:07:53,516 Of course, anything. Should we discuss it over dinner? 137 00:07:53,599 --> 00:07:55,726 I'll take a raincheck on that. 138 00:07:55,810 --> 00:07:58,187 I was hoping that my grandson 139 00:07:58,270 --> 00:08:01,857 could join in your physics class until John is, uh... 140 00:08:02,733 --> 00:08:03,693 back. 141 00:08:03,694 --> 00:08:05,028 From the mental hospital? 142 00:08:05,861 --> 00:08:06,821 Yes. 143 00:08:06,822 --> 00:08:09,240 The one he never told you he'd been in before? 144 00:08:10,157 --> 00:08:11,157 Yes. 145 00:08:11,200 --> 00:08:13,452 A curious ethical choice on his part if you ask me. 146 00:08:13,536 --> 00:08:16,580 - Can he take the class or not? - Of course. 147 00:08:16,664 --> 00:08:20,584 Although I never taught a child before. Is he potty-trained? 148 00:08:27,591 --> 00:08:28,592 What are you doing? 149 00:08:28,676 --> 00:08:32,179 Watching last week's Professor Proton in my mind. 150 00:08:32,263 --> 00:08:33,431 Moonpie. 151 00:08:34,140 --> 00:08:35,766 Good news. 152 00:08:36,517 --> 00:08:38,602 You can start going to your college class again. 153 00:08:38,686 --> 00:08:39,979 Dr. Sturgis is back? 154 00:08:40,062 --> 00:08:45,192 No, but his friend Dr. Linkletter is gonna let you come and take his class. 155 00:08:45,276 --> 00:08:47,153 But I take Dr. Sturgis's class. 156 00:08:47,236 --> 00:08:49,321 I know, but that's not an option right now, 157 00:08:49,405 --> 00:08:53,868 and Dr. Linkletter's been nice enough to let you sit in on his. 158 00:08:53,951 --> 00:08:57,288 - But I like the way that Dr. Sturgis teaches. - Well, you might like the way that 159 00:08:57,371 --> 00:08:59,749 Dr. Linkletter teaches even better. 160 00:08:59,832 --> 00:09:01,542 - Is it lecture-based? - I don't know. 161 00:09:01,625 --> 00:09:03,377 His interpretation of quantum mechanics? 162 00:09:03,461 --> 00:09:05,588 - I couldn't say. - Where'd he get his doctorate? 163 00:09:05,671 --> 00:09:09,175 From the University of Shut Up and Say Thank You. 164 00:09:09,258 --> 00:09:10,258 Thank you. 165 00:09:15,806 --> 00:09:18,184 I thought you were gonna take out the garbage. 166 00:09:18,267 --> 00:09:22,271 I'm sorry, I was under the impression you did everything around here. 167 00:09:22,354 --> 00:09:24,482 You really wanna start this again? 168 00:09:25,274 --> 00:09:29,153 I contribute plenty, and it wouldn't kill you to show a little appreciation. 169 00:09:29,236 --> 00:09:30,696 I'll be sure to do that. 170 00:09:30,780 --> 00:09:34,992 As soon as I finish the laundry, the dishes, the vacuuming, 171 00:09:35,076 --> 00:09:37,870 the grocery shopping, and helping Missy with her homework. 172 00:09:37,953 --> 00:09:40,039 You like how my job pays all the bills, right? 173 00:09:40,122 --> 00:09:42,291 Stop acting like you're the only one with a job. 174 00:09:43,542 --> 00:09:45,252 Mom, Pastor Jeff's on the phone. 175 00:09:45,336 --> 00:09:47,671 - I have to take this. - Of course you do. 176 00:09:48,714 --> 00:09:49,840 Hi, Pastor Jeff. 177 00:09:51,926 --> 00:09:53,427 Everything okay? 178 00:09:53,511 --> 00:09:54,887 I'm in trouble. 179 00:09:55,513 --> 00:09:59,433 Robin just got here, she looks nice, and she smells even nicer. 180 00:09:59,517 --> 00:10:03,729 Come on, now, uh, nothing smells better than eternal salvation. 181 00:10:03,813 --> 00:10:06,148 I know, but we put so much thought into my clothes, 182 00:10:06,232 --> 00:10:08,943 we didn't think about what she'd be wearing. 183 00:10:09,026 --> 00:10:10,736 Why, what's she wearing? 184 00:10:11,862 --> 00:10:14,365 Georgie, you hang up that phone right now! 185 00:10:20,246 --> 00:10:21,831 I just can't win. 186 00:10:21,914 --> 00:10:26,168 When I step in, I'm doing it wrong, and when I don't step in, she yells at me. 187 00:10:26,252 --> 00:10:28,963 - I hear you. - So Darlene does the same thing with you? 188 00:10:29,046 --> 00:10:32,591 No, but I'd hate it if she did, that sounds awful. 189 00:10:32,675 --> 00:10:34,135 So what do you two fight about? 190 00:10:35,052 --> 00:10:37,179 You know, normal stuff. 191 00:10:37,263 --> 00:10:39,014 Who loves the other one more, 192 00:10:39,098 --> 00:10:41,267 whose turn it is for a foot rub. 193 00:10:41,350 --> 00:10:46,063 Oh, the other day, we did argue about which way the toilet paper should hang. 194 00:10:46,147 --> 00:10:48,190 - Who won? - I don't remember. 195 00:10:48,274 --> 00:10:50,943 We just ended up making love on the bathroom floor. 196 00:10:51,944 --> 00:10:54,238 Thank you, Wayne, this has been real helpful. 197 00:10:55,489 --> 00:10:58,450 When was the last time you took Mary out on a date? 198 00:10:59,910 --> 00:11:01,453 I couldn't even tell you. 199 00:11:02,371 --> 00:11:03,539 That poor woman. 200 00:11:03,622 --> 00:11:05,875 Hey, you're supposed to be on my side. 201 00:11:05,958 --> 00:11:06,916 I'd like to be, 202 00:11:06,917 --> 00:11:09,461 but you're not giving me much to work with. 203 00:11:21,182 --> 00:11:22,182 Hey. 204 00:11:32,026 --> 00:11:34,195 Smells like you had a good time. 205 00:11:37,823 --> 00:11:40,242 How'd you like to go out for dinner on Friday? 206 00:11:40,326 --> 00:11:41,326 Just you and me. 207 00:11:42,828 --> 00:11:44,246 Why? 208 00:11:44,330 --> 00:11:45,623 Because you're my wife. 209 00:11:45,706 --> 00:11:48,250 I was your life last Friday, and we didn't go to dinner. 210 00:11:48,334 --> 00:11:50,336 Mary, I'm asking you on a date. 211 00:11:52,588 --> 00:11:54,256 Okay. 212 00:11:54,340 --> 00:11:55,633 Is that a yes? 213 00:11:56,634 --> 00:11:57,634 Sure. 214 00:11:59,762 --> 00:12:00,762 All right then. 215 00:12:02,223 --> 00:12:04,558 If you did something stupid, I'm gonna find out. 216 00:12:09,772 --> 00:12:12,733 Same room, different teacher. 217 00:12:12,816 --> 00:12:15,653 Same night, different time. 218 00:12:15,736 --> 00:12:17,446 This is a real rollercoaster. 219 00:12:17,529 --> 00:12:20,366 - Yeah, it's wild. - Connie. So nice to see you. 220 00:12:20,449 --> 00:12:24,161 Nice to see you too. Sheldon, this is Dr. Linkletter. 221 00:12:24,245 --> 00:12:26,538 - Hello. - I've heard so much about you. 222 00:12:26,622 --> 00:12:29,875 Apparently not how I feel about shaking hands. 223 00:12:29,959 --> 00:12:31,835 And on that fun note, I'll leave you to it. 224 00:12:31,919 --> 00:12:33,921 Sure you wouldn't like to stay for the lecture? 225 00:12:34,004 --> 00:12:39,218 Oh, no, bad idea. I'm told I snore. Darling, I'll be out in the hall if you need me. 226 00:12:42,096 --> 00:12:45,182 Just a warning, today's lecture is rather advanced. 227 00:12:45,266 --> 00:12:48,269 Don't worry, if you get confused, I'll be right here in the front row. 228 00:12:54,775 --> 00:12:55,943 So this is nice. 229 00:12:56,026 --> 00:12:57,236 Yes. 230 00:13:08,580 --> 00:13:09,707 Lemon in the water. 231 00:13:12,626 --> 00:13:16,880 It's weird to look at a menu and not have to wonder what Sheldon won't eat. 232 00:13:18,090 --> 00:13:21,260 It got easier when he printed that card for my wallet. 233 00:13:22,303 --> 00:13:24,596 Still don't know where he got that laminated. 234 00:13:24,680 --> 00:13:25,680 Yeah. 235 00:13:26,557 --> 00:13:29,768 It's just the two of us, we don't have to talk about the kids. 236 00:13:29,852 --> 00:13:30,852 You're right. 237 00:13:38,235 --> 00:13:41,113 You don't think Georgie and Missy are doing anything stupid, do you? 238 00:13:43,657 --> 00:13:46,410 If Mom knew this was in the house, she'd lose her mind. 239 00:13:46,493 --> 00:13:50,289 - I know. Mom does not like demons. - So how does it work? 240 00:13:50,372 --> 00:13:53,625 You put your fingertips on it like this, and you ask it questions. 241 00:13:53,709 --> 00:13:58,339 Then the spirits from beyond will move it around the board and answer them. 242 00:13:58,422 --> 00:13:59,465 Whoa. 243 00:13:59,548 --> 00:14:00,548 Let's try. 244 00:14:02,092 --> 00:14:03,092 Okay. 245 00:14:09,767 --> 00:14:12,770 Pastor Jeff talked about these in Sunday school. 246 00:14:12,853 --> 00:14:15,105 He called them Satan's Monopoly board. 247 00:14:16,899 --> 00:14:18,108 Come on. 248 00:14:23,072 --> 00:14:24,656 I'll get it. 249 00:14:27,534 --> 00:14:28,827 Hello? 250 00:14:29,620 --> 00:14:31,830 It's Pastor Jeff, what do I do? 251 00:14:31,914 --> 00:14:32,914 See what he wants. 252 00:14:34,625 --> 00:14:35,626 What do you want? 253 00:14:35,709 --> 00:14:37,628 Um, is your mom home? 254 00:14:37,711 --> 00:14:40,172 No, she went out with my dad. It's just me and Georgie. 255 00:14:40,255 --> 00:14:42,132 Oh, okay. 256 00:14:42,216 --> 00:14:45,010 Well, I hope you two are behaving yourselves. 257 00:14:45,094 --> 00:14:47,388 We are, we're just watching TV. 258 00:14:48,347 --> 00:14:49,348 Okay, bye. 259 00:14:51,183 --> 00:14:53,477 - I just lied to a pastor. - So? 260 00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:54,812 So I'm going to hell. 261 00:14:54,895 --> 00:14:56,897 - No, you're not. - Yes, I am. 262 00:14:57,940 --> 00:14:58,940 Sucks for you. 263 00:15:00,025 --> 00:15:01,985 Then we're able to take the ends of the strings 264 00:15:02,069 --> 00:15:04,822 and connect them to a 10-dimensional membrane. 265 00:15:04,905 --> 00:15:05,905 Yes, Sheldon? 266 00:15:05,948 --> 00:15:08,909 Dr. Sturgis taught us that if you leave the strings open, 267 00:15:08,992 --> 00:15:10,661 it allows far more possibilities. 268 00:15:10,744 --> 00:15:15,249 We don't believe you need open strings anymore, that's an older model of thinking. 269 00:15:15,332 --> 00:15:16,542 Now... 270 00:15:16,708 --> 00:15:17,668 Yes, Sheldon? 271 00:15:17,669 --> 00:15:20,797 Just because something is older doesn't mean that it's not still good. 272 00:15:20,879 --> 00:15:23,090 Original Star Trek is older than Next Generation, 273 00:15:23,173 --> 00:15:25,801 but if you think that Mr. Data is better than Mr. Spock, 274 00:15:25,884 --> 00:15:29,430 - you don't know what you're talking about. - I don't know what you're talking about. 275 00:15:37,271 --> 00:15:39,231 Sorry you're not having a good time. 276 00:15:39,314 --> 00:15:40,858 No, I am. 277 00:15:40,941 --> 00:15:42,734 This is lovely. 278 00:15:44,862 --> 00:15:46,822 But can I ask, what prompted it? 279 00:15:48,657 --> 00:15:49,657 Well... 280 00:15:50,409 --> 00:15:52,703 Wayne and I were discussing marriage, 281 00:15:52,786 --> 00:15:55,372 and he was going on about how happy he is. 282 00:15:55,456 --> 00:15:57,040 I just want to try to work on ours. 283 00:15:59,710 --> 00:16:01,420 That's really sweet, George. 284 00:16:03,380 --> 00:16:05,132 So they go on dinner dates like this? 285 00:16:05,215 --> 00:16:09,052 Oh, they do all kinds of stuff. Line dancing and movie nights. 286 00:16:09,136 --> 00:16:11,930 You wouldn't believe what they got up to in their bathroom. 287 00:16:12,014 --> 00:16:14,224 - Where do they find the time? - Well... 288 00:16:15,142 --> 00:16:16,768 they don't have any kids, so... 289 00:16:18,353 --> 00:16:21,857 Son of a bitch, they don't have kids. That's why they're happy. 290 00:16:21,940 --> 00:16:23,650 - George. - It's true. 291 00:16:23,734 --> 00:16:25,903 You and I used to be way more fun. 292 00:16:25,986 --> 00:16:28,864 That may be so, but you can't blame the children. 293 00:16:28,947 --> 00:16:30,657 Oh, I can and I am. 294 00:16:30,741 --> 00:16:33,744 Don't get me wrong, they're great, I love them, but you gotta admit, 295 00:16:33,827 --> 00:16:36,205 they do not make our lives easy. 296 00:16:37,831 --> 00:16:39,166 I suppose there's a... 297 00:16:40,209 --> 00:16:42,377 challenging aspect to them. 298 00:16:42,461 --> 00:16:44,171 There you go. 299 00:16:44,254 --> 00:16:46,381 Feels good to say it out loud, right? 300 00:16:47,716 --> 00:16:48,716 Maybe a little. 301 00:16:49,801 --> 00:16:54,348 Hey, think about how clean the house would be if it was just us. 302 00:16:54,431 --> 00:16:55,682 Oh, my. 303 00:16:59,603 --> 00:17:01,980 So, what did they do in the bathroom? 304 00:17:06,485 --> 00:17:08,487 I'm going to hell, I'm going to hell. 305 00:17:08,570 --> 00:17:10,531 Relax, not until you're dead. 306 00:17:12,241 --> 00:17:14,076 You smell really nice. 307 00:17:14,785 --> 00:17:15,785 Thank you. 308 00:17:16,537 --> 00:17:18,247 It's soap. 309 00:17:18,330 --> 00:17:19,998 I love soap. 310 00:17:26,004 --> 00:17:27,047 I'll get it. 311 00:17:28,757 --> 00:17:30,467 - Hello? - I lied to you. 312 00:17:30,551 --> 00:17:33,470 I wasn't watching TV, I was playing with a Ouija board. 313 00:17:33,554 --> 00:17:37,140 - Who is this? - Missy Cooper, and I'm going to hell. 314 00:17:37,224 --> 00:17:39,101 Missy, you're not gonna go to hell. 315 00:17:39,184 --> 00:17:41,645 Yes, I am, God knows what I did. 316 00:17:41,728 --> 00:17:43,397 He sees everything. 317 00:17:45,607 --> 00:17:46,607 You're right. 318 00:17:48,527 --> 00:17:50,320 God does see everything. 319 00:17:50,404 --> 00:17:54,032 But he also just saw you be a good Christian and tell the truth. 320 00:17:54,116 --> 00:17:57,411 So I promise, your soul is safe. 321 00:17:57,494 --> 00:17:59,371 - You're sure? - I'm sure. 322 00:17:59,454 --> 00:18:02,583 - If you're lying, you're going to hell too. - I'm sure. 323 00:18:03,792 --> 00:18:04,918 Thank you. 324 00:18:05,002 --> 00:18:06,169 You take care now. 325 00:18:12,426 --> 00:18:14,219 The Lord just sent me a message. 326 00:18:15,137 --> 00:18:16,972 - Really? - I'm sorry. 327 00:18:18,181 --> 00:18:21,351 I can't be in a physical relationship outside of marriage. 328 00:18:22,561 --> 00:18:23,561 Okay. 329 00:18:24,605 --> 00:18:25,772 I respect that. 330 00:18:26,732 --> 00:18:29,067 - Thank you. - So when are we getting married? 331 00:18:31,278 --> 00:18:32,279 Uh... 332 00:18:34,364 --> 00:18:37,367 We don't need open strings, we just connect them to a D-brane. 333 00:18:37,451 --> 00:18:40,996 But your theories can't recreate the known symmetries of the real world. 334 00:18:41,079 --> 00:18:42,247 Everything okay in here? 335 00:18:42,331 --> 00:18:45,917 More than okay, we're having a spirited debate on super string theory. 336 00:18:46,001 --> 00:18:47,711 Very spirited. 337 00:18:47,794 --> 00:18:50,589 - Well, you ready to go home? - Yes, unless Dr. Linkletter... 338 00:18:50,672 --> 00:18:51,965 He's ready. 339 00:18:52,549 --> 00:18:54,384 Well, I guess we'll see you next week. 340 00:18:54,468 --> 00:18:55,844 Sounds good. 341 00:18:58,138 --> 00:18:59,890 No wonder Sturgis went crazy.