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- Synced & corrected by MementMori -
-- www.addic7ed.com --
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- [WHEELS RATTLING]
- [QUICK FOOTSTEPS]
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[SOFT HOOTING]
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- [DOORS BUMP OPEN, SHUT]
- [SOFT SNUFFLING]
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[LOW HOOTING]
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It's okay, little fella.
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No one's gonna hurt ya.
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[SOFT CHITTERING]
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[PETER SCHILLING'S "MAJOR
TOM (COMING HOME)" PLAYS]
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[VIDEO CAMERA WHIRRING]
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[CHIMP HOOTING SOFTLY]
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- [STOPWATCH CLICKS]
- [BELL DINGS]
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[WHINES SOFTLY]
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[SOFT CHITTERING]
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- [CAMERA CONTINUES WHIRRING]
- [SOFT GRUNTS]
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♪ Standing there alone ♪
♪ The ship is waiting ♪
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- [GRUNTS, SQUEAKS]
- ♪ All systems are go ♪
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- [CLICKS]
- ♪ Are you sure? ♪
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- ♪ Control is not convinced ♪
- [CHIMP HOOTS]
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♪ But their computer has the evidence ♪
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- [EXCITED HOOTING]
- ♪ No need to abort ♪
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♪ The countdown starts ♪
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♪ Watching in a trance ♪
♪ The crew is certain ♪
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♪ Nothing left to chance ♪
♪ All is working ♪
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♪ Trying to relax ♪
♪ Up in the capsule... ♪
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[MAN] This is Mercury control.
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The Mercury spacecraft umbilical is out.
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- Nine, eight, seven, six...
- ♪ The countdown is on ♪
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- ... five, four, three, two, one.
- ♪ Four, three, two, one ♪
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- Ignition... [CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY]
- ♪ Earth below us ♪
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♪ Drifting, falling ♪
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- ♪ Floating weightless ♪
- [SHRIEKING]
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- ♪ Calling, calling home ♪
- [SOFT HOOTING]
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[MAN] Cabin pressure holding, 5.5.
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[SOFT HOOTING]
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♪ Second stage is cut ♪
♪ We're now in orbit... ♪
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[MAN] Everything is
a-okay in the cockpit.
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- ♪ Starting to collect ♪
- [BELL DINGS]
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- ♪ Requested data ♪
- [HOOTING]
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- ♪ What will it affect... ♪
- [CONSOLE BEEPS]
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[MAN] He's going to
hand-control movement now.
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- [ALARM BEEPING]
- [CONTROLLERS CLICKING]
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- [THUNDEROUS BOOM]
- [WARNING ALARM SOUNDING]
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- ♪ Earth below us, drifting, falling ♪
- [NERVOUS CHITTERING]
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- ♪ Floating weightless ♪
- [SHRIEKING]
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♪ Calling, calling home ♪
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[SHRIEKING, SILENCE]
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[MAN] Do you have any word
from the recovery troops?
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[NO AUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
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♪ Earth below us ♪
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♪ Drifting, falling ♪
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- [GRACE GASPS]
- ♪ Floating weightless ♪
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♪ Coming home ♪
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♪ Home... ♪
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[READING IN ANCIENT GREEK]
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[IN ENGLISH] "Sing in me, Muse,
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and through me tell
the story of that man
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skilled in all ways of contending,
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the wanderer,
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harried for years on end... "
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Reggie, he's sleepin'.
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[SQUEAKS SOFTLY]
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[REGINALD] Then I suppose
Homer will have to wait.
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♪ Home ♪
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♪ Home ♪
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♪ Home ♪
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[SONG FADES OUT]
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You know, I'm starting to get
the feeling Dad's avoiding us.
69
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[LILA SIGHS] Hate to be
the boring one, guys,
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00:04:48,705 --> 00:04:50,785
but, uh, it's time we get
the hell out of here.
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00:04:50,873 --> 00:04:53,673
When you say "we,"
who exactly are you referring to?
72
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Not a lot of ambiguity in that sentence.
73
00:04:55,670 --> 00:04:58,760
Listen, I don't know who you
are or where you came from,
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00:04:59,048 --> 00:05:02,218
but whatever it is,
I'd advise you return posthaste.
75
00:05:02,302 --> 00:05:04,012
She's right, Five.
We gotta get outta here.
76
00:05:04,095 --> 00:05:05,755
I just saved your life, you kinder-shit.
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00:05:06,139 --> 00:05:08,219
If I hadn't stepped in, all
that would be left of you
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00:05:08,224 --> 00:05:09,734
is a blazer and some bloody socks.
79
00:05:09,809 --> 00:05:11,269
And that's the problem.
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You're too good.
You ask too many questions.
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You know too much.
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00:05:15,565 --> 00:05:17,895
And you fight like you
know what you're doing.
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00:05:18,234 --> 00:05:20,534
- He's got a point.
- So I know how to handle myself,
84
00:05:20,611 --> 00:05:21,811
and that makes me the bad guy?
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00:05:21,863 --> 00:05:23,873
Whoever you are, you're in my way.
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00:05:24,449 --> 00:05:26,949
If I see you again, I will kill you.
87
00:05:37,003 --> 00:05:38,003
Diego, we need to go.
88
00:05:38,421 --> 00:05:40,381
I was getting my ass
handed to me back there.
89
00:05:40,465 --> 00:05:42,085
You helped Five, not me.
90
00:05:43,217 --> 00:05:45,927
- Why?
- Because he's a kid and you're a man.
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00:05:46,971 --> 00:05:48,431
Bloody act like one.
92
00:05:52,352 --> 00:05:53,772
Diego, I... I...
93
00:05:54,103 --> 00:05:55,483
- We shouldn't...
- You know what?
94
00:05:57,106 --> 00:05:58,976
I'm used to dealing with liars, Lila,
95
00:05:59,067 --> 00:06:01,357
but I like it better when I know
what they're lying about.
96
00:06:01,444 --> 00:06:03,364
[SOFT PIANO MELODY PLAYS]
97
00:06:03,446 --> 00:06:06,906
Oh, come on, Diego. Really?
You're just gonna walk away?
98
00:06:07,408 --> 00:06:08,408
Diego.
99
00:06:19,796 --> 00:06:21,046
[GROANS]
100
00:06:21,923 --> 00:06:24,053
[BEN] And how are we
feeling this morning?
101
00:06:24,384 --> 00:06:27,474
Oh, peaches and cream. How are you?
102
00:06:28,388 --> 00:06:31,428
Curious, how many more rock-bottoms
are you gonna have to hit
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00:06:31,440 --> 00:06:33,420
before you start taking
care of yourself?
104
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[SIGHS] I'm thinking
of a number between...
105
00:06:36,380 --> 00:06:39,524
11 and... 25.
106
00:06:39,774 --> 00:06:42,824
What ghost are you talking to now?
107
00:06:44,028 --> 00:06:45,568
Oh, just another...
108
00:06:46,906 --> 00:06:48,986
just another old cowboy.
109
00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:50,655
Texas is lousy with them.
110
00:06:50,743 --> 00:06:53,203
They're usually pretty
cute, but this one is...
111
00:06:53,955 --> 00:06:55,955
this one is ugly and...
112
00:06:56,666 --> 00:06:57,706
dumb.
113
00:06:57,792 --> 00:06:59,292
Is that really necessary?
114
00:06:59,377 --> 00:07:00,587
[KLAUS] Mm-hmm.
115
00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:04,376
You want some?
116
00:07:05,341 --> 00:07:08,091
Klaus, if you're looking for
an enabler, look elsewhere.
117
00:07:08,210 --> 00:07:09,992
Allison, your marriage is in trouble
118
00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:12,469
and your rally turned into a riot.
119
00:07:12,557 --> 00:07:15,873
If now's not the time
to do some drink party,
120
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I don't know when is.
121
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What happened?
122
00:07:26,529 --> 00:07:28,159
Oh, where to begin? [CHUCKLES]
123
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My claustrophobic cult tracked
me down, I fell off the wagon,
124
00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:35,542
and I professed my undying love for...
125
00:07:35,872 --> 00:07:36,872
[BELCHES]
126
00:07:36,914 --> 00:07:39,254
... this young gay man who
doesn't know he's gay yet
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00:07:39,333 --> 00:07:44,383
at a 1963 diner in front of
his blatantly closeted uncle.
128
00:07:45,756 --> 00:07:47,756
Yeah, well, not in that order, but...
129
00:07:50,094 --> 00:07:51,094
Mmm!
130
00:07:54,682 --> 00:07:56,932
- Aren't we a pair? [SNIFFS]
- [CHUCKLES] Yeah.
131
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- Oh, Jesus.
- [LAUGHS SOFTLY]
132
00:07:59,979 --> 00:08:01,689
- [FLASK CLATTERS]
- Hey, uh, excuse me.
133
00:08:01,772 --> 00:08:03,355
- Attagirl.
- [ALLISON] I've got a blender
134
00:08:03,357 --> 00:08:05,737
and some much better booze.
135
00:08:05,818 --> 00:08:08,488
So, if we're gonna start day-drinking,
we should do it right.
136
00:08:09,655 --> 00:08:12,615
- [WHIMPERS] I love you so much.
- [CHUCKLES]
137
00:08:12,992 --> 00:08:14,792
Yeah. Yeah!
138
00:08:15,286 --> 00:08:16,286
Oh!
139
00:08:18,915 --> 00:08:21,455
- [CHICKENS CLUCKING]
- [COW MOOS]
140
00:08:21,542 --> 00:08:24,132
- [ROOSTER CROWS]
- [SOFT GUITAR SONG PLAYS ON RADIO]
141
00:08:36,307 --> 00:08:37,477
Morning.
142
00:08:38,851 --> 00:08:40,851
Hey. Is that coffee?
143
00:08:42,230 --> 00:08:43,230
Want some?
144
00:08:50,196 --> 00:08:51,516
- What time is it?
- [SISSY SIGHS]
145
00:08:51,948 --> 00:08:53,698
I don't know, and I don't care.
146
00:08:53,991 --> 00:08:55,201
Yeah, you do.
147
00:08:56,369 --> 00:08:59,159
Oh, my God.
148
00:08:59,247 --> 00:09:00,957
I think we've earned a day off.
149
00:09:02,500 --> 00:09:03,500
Okay, half a day.
150
00:09:04,043 --> 00:09:05,043
A few hours.
151
00:09:06,003 --> 00:09:07,003
Hush up.
152
00:09:16,806 --> 00:09:17,806
What is it?
153
00:09:20,101 --> 00:09:21,391
Do we need to talk?
154
00:09:22,395 --> 00:09:24,395
- A-About...
- Do you want to?
155
00:09:25,565 --> 00:09:27,645
[SISSY SIGHS HEAVILY]
156
00:09:29,068 --> 00:09:30,698
Talking makes things real,
157
00:09:31,445 --> 00:09:33,315
and real things end.
158
00:09:33,406 --> 00:09:35,156
This feels sweeter than that.
159
00:09:39,662 --> 00:09:43,002
You know yesterday when you were
talking about us running away?
160
00:09:44,125 --> 00:09:46,835
- What if we could?
- [SISSY] Where would we go?
161
00:09:47,253 --> 00:09:49,263
Somewhere safe for Harlan and...
162
00:09:50,381 --> 00:09:52,591
where we could be together like this
163
00:09:52,883 --> 00:09:54,013
all the time.
164
00:09:58,639 --> 00:10:00,099
I'd go there right now.
165
00:10:06,022 --> 00:10:08,152
- [DOG BARKS OUTSIDE]
- [SISSY CHUCKLES]
166
00:10:12,445 --> 00:10:13,695
- [DOG BARKS]
- [HORN HONKS]
167
00:10:13,779 --> 00:10:15,159
[SISSY GASPING]
168
00:10:15,239 --> 00:10:16,239
Oh, shit.
169
00:10:16,532 --> 00:10:17,662
Carl's back early.
170
00:10:19,076 --> 00:10:20,366
[SIZZLING]
171
00:10:21,746 --> 00:10:24,226
[DIEGO] No, no, no, I don't understand.
They keep following me.
172
00:10:24,290 --> 00:10:26,380
- [LUTHER] Wait, who?
- Those Dutch sociopaths.
173
00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:28,089
They're Swedish, you idiot.
174
00:10:28,169 --> 00:10:29,959
Hired guns paid to eradicate us
175
00:10:30,046 --> 00:10:32,256
before we do any more
damage to this timeline.
176
00:10:32,340 --> 00:10:35,180
Yeah, but why now? I mean,
I'm... [SNAPS FINGERS]
177
00:10:35,259 --> 00:10:37,389
... fine for three months
until you showed up.
178
00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:40,850
Yeah, I was here for a year
and no one messed with me.
179
00:10:42,475 --> 00:10:45,185
Even if it was my fault, which it isn't,
180
00:10:45,686 --> 00:10:47,686
we only have six days before
the end of the world,
181
00:10:47,740 --> 00:10:49,320
and the closest anyone's gotten to Dad
182
00:10:49,340 --> 00:10:51,442
was that driveway at the consulate.
183
00:10:52,318 --> 00:10:53,898
Well... [SIGHS]
184
00:10:54,445 --> 00:10:55,945
... that's not exactly true.
185
00:11:02,078 --> 00:11:03,158
What do you mean?
186
00:11:05,790 --> 00:11:06,790
I saw him.
187
00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:10,290
- Oh, shit!
- [UPBEAT GUITAR INSTRUMENTALS PLAYING]
188
00:11:10,419 --> 00:11:11,669
[LUTHER] Diego!
189
00:11:12,171 --> 00:11:13,171
Five?
190
00:11:14,006 --> 00:11:15,336
Allison!
191
00:11:17,134 --> 00:11:20,224
- Allis...
- Allison!
192
00:11:22,390 --> 00:11:23,720
Two-ninety-two...
193
00:11:24,600 --> 00:11:25,940
Two-ninety-three.
194
00:11:28,771 --> 00:11:32,111
Hey, um, I'm seven cents short.
195
00:11:35,778 --> 00:11:37,778
Uh... give me what you got.
196
00:11:40,908 --> 00:11:42,948
[LUTHER] Oh, shit. [MUTTERING]
197
00:11:44,036 --> 00:11:45,036
Damn it.
198
00:11:46,664 --> 00:11:47,664
Sorry about that.
199
00:11:47,998 --> 00:11:48,998
Thanks.
200
00:11:49,625 --> 00:11:50,665
[GROANS]
201
00:11:52,545 --> 00:11:54,205
That boy stinks.
202
00:11:59,385 --> 00:12:00,675
[BRAKES HISSING]
203
00:12:00,761 --> 00:12:03,561
[UPBEAT GUITAR INSTRUMENTALS CONTINUE]
204
00:12:28,456 --> 00:12:30,166
[SIGHS] Home.
205
00:12:33,878 --> 00:12:35,878
[EXHALES] "This is gonna sound crazy,
206
00:12:37,465 --> 00:12:39,045
but, Reginald Hargreeves...
207
00:12:40,551 --> 00:12:41,681
I am your son."
208
00:12:43,596 --> 00:12:46,266
[FOUR HOLIDAYS' "HE CAN'T
LOVE YOU" PLAYS ON RADIO]
209
00:12:46,348 --> 00:12:47,678
[PEOPLE CHATTERING]
210
00:12:47,767 --> 00:12:49,557
[WOMAN 1] Let's get back
on that dance floor.
211
00:12:50,352 --> 00:12:51,902
- Whoo-hoo!
- [WOMAN 2] Yes!
212
00:12:51,979 --> 00:12:54,319
♪ He can't love you ♪
213
00:12:54,398 --> 00:12:56,938
- ♪ He can't love you ♪
- ♪ He can't love you ♪
214
00:12:57,026 --> 00:12:58,066
[WOMAN 3] He stinks.
215
00:12:58,152 --> 00:13:01,492
- ♪ He can't love you ♪
- ♪ He can't love you ♪
216
00:13:01,572 --> 00:13:03,662
- ♪ He can't love you ♪
- ♪ Naw ♪
217
00:13:03,741 --> 00:13:06,791
♪ Don't you know that ♪
♪ He just can't make it ♪
218
00:13:06,869 --> 00:13:08,579
- ♪ Better ♪
- ♪ Better, better ♪
219
00:13:08,662 --> 00:13:11,082
- ♪ Better ♪
- ♪ Oh, better than I can... ♪
220
00:13:11,165 --> 00:13:12,165
Dad?
221
00:13:12,792 --> 00:13:16,302
[REGINALD] Please, the world's never
going to end in such a cliché.
222
00:13:16,712 --> 00:13:17,712
Believe me.
223
00:13:18,130 --> 00:13:19,760
I know how endings feel.
224
00:13:20,466 --> 00:13:22,836
Reg, with all these bombs
and big red buttons,
225
00:13:22,927 --> 00:13:25,007
we're bloody close to
the end of the world.
226
00:13:25,179 --> 00:13:27,889
- Even a fool can see that.
- [REGINALD] I will give you this:
227
00:13:28,350 --> 00:13:30,540
the physics of numerous quanta
228
00:13:30,570 --> 00:13:32,852
tells us that we cannot be
certain about anything,
229
00:13:33,270 --> 00:13:35,520
especially if time is concerned.
230
00:13:36,065 --> 00:13:38,465
Even if you knew everything
there is to know about right now,
231
00:13:38,776 --> 00:13:41,146
you could never predict
what will happen next.
232
00:13:41,230 --> 00:13:42,800
We don't live in a universe of rules,
233
00:13:42,820 --> 00:13:44,817
we live in a universe of chances.
234
00:13:45,032 --> 00:13:48,162
Some events, however,
are more likely than others.
235
00:13:48,410 --> 00:13:52,790
For instance, it is a near certainty
that in the next few minutes,
236
00:13:53,707 --> 00:13:55,877
I am going to get another
glass of champagne.
237
00:13:55,960 --> 00:13:57,920
[GROUP LAUGHS]
238
00:13:58,420 --> 00:13:59,760
Would you look at that?
239
00:14:03,968 --> 00:14:06,048
This is gonna sound crazy, but, uh...
240
00:14:08,973 --> 00:14:10,223
I'm your son.
241
00:14:11,392 --> 00:14:12,392
No, you're not.
242
00:14:12,810 --> 00:14:15,650
- But, no, I'm... I'm from the future.
- [REGINALD] No, you're not.
243
00:14:16,146 --> 00:14:19,526
You adopted me and six
other children in 1989.
244
00:14:19,608 --> 00:14:20,648
- No, I didn't.
- I...
245
00:14:21,485 --> 00:14:22,565
I know about the moon base.
246
00:14:23,237 --> 00:14:25,487
I know about all your
experiments with monkeys.
247
00:14:25,573 --> 00:14:26,573
Apes.
248
00:14:27,616 --> 00:14:31,246
Look, I know everything about you.
249
00:14:33,163 --> 00:14:34,163
Please...
250
00:14:35,416 --> 00:14:36,456
I need your help.
251
00:14:37,376 --> 00:14:39,836
Listen, I don't know who sent you
252
00:14:40,588 --> 00:14:41,758
or what you want,
253
00:14:41,839 --> 00:14:45,049
but you can run back to
your masters at CIA or KGB
254
00:14:45,130 --> 00:14:47,320
and tell them that this is
the most ridiculous gambit
255
00:14:47,340 --> 00:14:49,284
- in spycraft history.
- What? Why?
256
00:14:49,290 --> 00:14:50,300
Why is it ridiculous?
257
00:14:50,389 --> 00:14:52,349
You know time travel is possible.
258
00:14:52,433 --> 00:14:53,933
Time travel isn't the problem.
259
00:14:54,143 --> 00:14:57,813
I have a deep dislike of children.
260
00:14:57,897 --> 00:15:00,147
I do not have them, nor
do I intend to have them,
261
00:15:00,232 --> 00:15:01,572
but if for some reason I did,
262
00:15:01,650 --> 00:15:04,030
I would expect more from
them than a scruffy face,
263
00:15:04,111 --> 00:15:07,361
poor hygiene, and your grotesque,
simian proportions.
264
00:15:09,158 --> 00:15:10,158
But...
265
00:15:12,036 --> 00:15:13,196
I took a bus.
266
00:15:13,537 --> 00:15:14,787
I don't care.
267
00:15:14,872 --> 00:15:19,882
Now, take yourself and the stench
of failure that encircles you
268
00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:21,420
and get out of my house.
269
00:15:22,046 --> 00:15:25,296
- [PEOPLE WHISPERING]
- [SOMBER INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING]
270
00:15:29,011 --> 00:15:30,931
- [DIEGO] That's pathetic.
- [LUTHER] Yeah, well,
271
00:15:31,096 --> 00:15:33,426
- at least he didn't shank my ass.
- [DIEGO] No, bro,
272
00:15:33,807 --> 00:15:34,927
he shanked your heart.
273
00:15:36,560 --> 00:15:37,560
[LUTHER] Mm.
274
00:15:37,603 --> 00:15:38,903
Is that my bathrobe?
275
00:15:39,292 --> 00:15:40,460
No.
276
00:15:40,470 --> 00:15:42,420
[FIVE] Look, who cares what he shanked?
277
00:15:42,441 --> 00:15:44,821
- He knows something about time travel.
- [ELLIOTT] Um...
278
00:15:44,902 --> 00:15:48,952
Wait, why don't you just do your
thing and, uh, time travel us out?
279
00:15:50,240 --> 00:15:51,660
Anyone care to explain?
280
00:15:51,867 --> 00:15:53,947
First time he tried, he got
lost in the apocalypse.
281
00:15:54,620 --> 00:15:56,620
Second time, he ended up
without hair on his balls.
282
00:15:56,705 --> 00:15:57,705
Last time I tried,
283
00:15:57,748 --> 00:16:00,788
I scattered my family across
three years in Dallas, Texas,
284
00:16:00,876 --> 00:16:02,706
possibly triggering a doomsday.
285
00:16:03,337 --> 00:16:04,797
Any more questions, Elliott?
286
00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:07,340
- Uh, no.
- [DIEGO] You're missing the big picture.
287
00:16:07,424 --> 00:16:10,014
Dad is the ringleader
of a sinister cabal
288
00:16:10,094 --> 00:16:11,894
that's planning to kill the president.
289
00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:13,261
- A cabal?
- [FIVE] Ignore him.
290
00:16:13,931 --> 00:16:15,931
Look, the way I see it,
we only have one option.
291
00:16:16,016 --> 00:16:17,476
[LUTHER] Oh, yeah? And what's that?
292
00:16:17,559 --> 00:16:19,769
It's time to get the Umbrella
Academy back together.
293
00:16:20,479 --> 00:16:22,359
Hell, yeah. Family meeting.
294
00:16:22,439 --> 00:16:24,269
Okay then, can one of
you get Allison, please?
295
00:16:24,358 --> 00:16:25,528
You two still a thing?
296
00:16:29,655 --> 00:16:31,865
- Do we need to talk?
- No, she's married.
297
00:16:31,949 --> 00:16:34,539
Whoa. Dude, that's rough.
298
00:16:34,910 --> 00:16:36,370
I can handle it. [CHUCKLES]
299
00:16:37,204 --> 00:16:38,204
I'll get her.
300
00:16:38,580 --> 00:16:41,250
Can you get Vanya without,
uh, squeezing her to death?
301
00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:43,001
I'll try.
302
00:16:44,420 --> 00:16:45,420
Wait! D...
303
00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:47,088
Uh...
304
00:16:47,423 --> 00:16:48,423
What should I do?
305
00:16:49,008 --> 00:16:50,218
Prepare for company.
306
00:16:50,300 --> 00:16:51,620
[CARL] Oh, you should've seen it.
307
00:16:51,677 --> 00:16:54,007
He said, "All the HoJo's in
the Southwest District."
308
00:16:54,090 --> 00:16:55,500
And I said, "All the HoJo's?"
309
00:16:55,510 --> 00:16:57,176
'Cause I wasn't sure
if I heard him right.
310
00:16:57,266 --> 00:16:59,476
And he said, "Yup! All the HoJo's."
311
00:17:00,269 --> 00:17:01,519
Vanya, did you hear the news?
312
00:17:01,603 --> 00:17:05,023
How would she, Carl? She doesn't
subscribe to Showerheads Today.
313
00:17:05,107 --> 00:17:06,397
[CARL] I'm in such a good mood,
314
00:17:06,483 --> 00:17:08,493
I'm gonna let that jape
pass without comment.
315
00:17:08,569 --> 00:17:09,739
[SISSY] That is a comment.
316
00:17:09,820 --> 00:17:11,780
[CARL] Vanya, you are lookin' at the man
317
00:17:11,864 --> 00:17:13,534
who has closed the biggest deal ever
318
00:17:13,615 --> 00:17:15,735
for Waterton Shower and
Shower Accessories Limited.
319
00:17:16,827 --> 00:17:17,867
That's great, Carl.
320
00:17:17,953 --> 00:17:19,163
[CARL] Thank you, Vanya.
321
00:17:19,538 --> 00:17:20,540
You see, Sissy?
322
00:17:20,550 --> 00:17:25,039
That is how you congratulate the
consummate conquering breadwinner.
323
00:17:25,127 --> 00:17:26,127
Carl, stop.
324
00:17:26,211 --> 00:17:28,261
Baby, I got such a day
planned for the three of us.
325
00:17:28,338 --> 00:17:30,668
First, we'll hit up the Egyptian
Room breakfast buffet,
326
00:17:30,758 --> 00:17:32,378
then watch some mutton bustin',
327
00:17:32,468 --> 00:17:35,428
and then take it to Cattlemen's
for a big ole steak. Mmm...
328
00:17:35,804 --> 00:17:36,804
Hey, Vanya.
329
00:17:37,097 --> 00:17:39,727
Why don't you go ahead
and take some time off?
330
00:17:39,808 --> 00:17:41,768
- [CARL CHUCKLES]
- [SISSY] Carl, stop.
331
00:17:41,852 --> 00:17:43,312
[SISSY] Not in front of Harlan.
332
00:17:43,395 --> 00:17:44,935
[CARL SCOFFS] Harlan don't care.
333
00:17:45,397 --> 00:17:46,687
I just want a kiss.
334
00:17:46,774 --> 00:17:48,574
- Can't you wait till we're alone?
- [BUZZING]
335
00:17:48,609 --> 00:17:49,769
[CARL] No, baby. No, I can't.
336
00:17:49,818 --> 00:17:51,778
- Well, you're gonna have to.
- [VANYA] Carl.
337
00:17:53,572 --> 00:17:55,822
- Stay out of this, Vanya.
- [CARL] Sissy.
338
00:17:55,908 --> 00:17:58,158
- [BUZZING GROWS LOUDER]
- The hell's going on with you?
339
00:17:58,243 --> 00:17:59,243
I'm just sick and tired
340
00:17:59,328 --> 00:18:01,538
- of you not listening!
- [SLAMS TABLE]
341
00:18:01,820 --> 00:18:03,498
[CARL] Well, I'm sick and
tired of having to fight
342
00:18:03,500 --> 00:18:05,035
for your goddamn attention.
343
00:18:05,042 --> 00:18:06,292
Are you my wife or not?
344
00:18:06,376 --> 00:18:09,506
- [GLASS CRACKS LOUDLY]
- [THUNDER RUMBLES]
345
00:18:09,588 --> 00:18:10,918
[CARL] What in the hell was that?
346
00:18:24,895 --> 00:18:25,895
Harlan, honey?
347
00:18:26,355 --> 00:18:27,935
Let's get your shoes on. Come on.
348
00:18:28,524 --> 00:18:29,524
Are you okay?
349
00:18:29,817 --> 00:18:30,897
Yeah, I'm fine.
350
00:18:31,693 --> 00:18:33,653
Just spending the day with my family.
351
00:18:51,964 --> 00:18:53,054
[DOOR SHUTS]
352
00:18:55,801 --> 00:18:56,891
Did you set me up?
353
00:18:57,761 --> 00:19:00,561
- Sweetie, really?
- Those Nordic shitwits?
354
00:19:00,639 --> 00:19:03,079
You said they were Commission.
You said they were on our side.
355
00:19:03,100 --> 00:19:05,390
Well, I was in the process
of executing our mission,
356
00:19:05,477 --> 00:19:07,557
my mission that you gave me,
and they got in the way.
357
00:19:07,604 --> 00:19:09,314
- Oh, my.
- And now my cover's blown.
358
00:19:09,398 --> 00:19:10,928
Five wants to kill me, and I don't know
359
00:19:10,930 --> 00:19:12,255
what the hell it is you're after.
360
00:19:13,235 --> 00:19:14,945
Did you bring me what I asked for?
361
00:19:18,448 --> 00:19:19,578
[LILA] Here.
362
00:19:20,117 --> 00:19:21,367
Diego's knife.
363
00:19:23,704 --> 00:19:25,004
- [HANDLER] Sit.
- No.
364
00:19:26,120 --> 00:19:27,350
Yes, you're bleeding,
365
00:19:27,360 --> 00:19:29,647
and all that rage is bad
for your complexion. Sit.
366
00:19:29,668 --> 00:19:31,998
[LILA] Fine, but I'm not
done being mad at you.
367
00:19:34,882 --> 00:19:35,972
[HANDLER] You're right.
368
00:19:39,595 --> 00:19:40,925
I have been lying to you.
369
00:19:42,139 --> 00:19:43,179
Commission...
370
00:19:43,807 --> 00:19:45,927
- has no idea...
- [GASPS SOFTLY]
371
00:19:47,394 --> 00:19:49,394
- ... that we're here.
- So, what are we doing here?
372
00:19:49,396 --> 00:19:50,556
We are...
373
00:19:51,982 --> 00:19:53,572
making something right...
374
00:19:54,193 --> 00:19:58,533
that has been wrong for
a very, very long time.
375
00:19:58,560 --> 00:20:00,299
Just about done with your riddles, Mum.
376
00:20:00,300 --> 00:20:01,529
Oh, are you just about done now?
377
00:20:01,530 --> 00:20:03,218
You've done a couple missions,
now you know everything?
378
00:20:03,220 --> 00:20:04,280
Huh? Is that it?
379
00:20:04,290 --> 00:20:05,308
Huh?
380
00:20:05,329 --> 00:20:08,459
Big Lila, all in charge,
not trusting her mother,
381
00:20:08,540 --> 00:20:11,710
her mother who yanked her
out of that horrid little slum,
382
00:20:11,793 --> 00:20:17,173
her mother who rescued her from
those gin-addled, neglectful parents,
383
00:20:17,257 --> 00:20:19,427
her mother who taught her
how to live, how to love,
384
00:20:20,177 --> 00:20:22,257
- how to survive?
- You just said you lied.
385
00:20:22,340 --> 00:20:24,170
You lied to them and they lied to me
386
00:20:24,190 --> 00:20:25,680
and everybody lies to everyone else.
387
00:20:25,724 --> 00:20:26,934
Grow up, buttercup.
388
00:20:27,017 --> 00:20:28,017
Ow.
389
00:20:29,311 --> 00:20:30,401
[HANDLER SIGHS]
390
00:20:31,180 --> 00:20:33,040
If I thought you needed
to know the truth,
391
00:20:33,060 --> 00:20:34,231
I would've told you the truth,
392
00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:36,153
but you didn't, and so I didn't,
393
00:20:36,235 --> 00:20:38,065
and everything worked out just fine.
394
00:20:38,570 --> 00:20:40,490
No, it hasn't. I lost Five.
395
00:20:40,948 --> 00:20:41,948
Is he dead?
396
00:20:42,449 --> 00:20:44,829
No. But he kicked me out
of his merry little band.
397
00:20:44,910 --> 00:20:46,910
- Ugh. Your wound is weeping.
- Oh.
398
00:20:46,995 --> 00:20:48,205
Oh, my dear, that...
399
00:20:48,789 --> 00:20:50,999
- that's not a problem at all.
- Why not?
400
00:20:51,083 --> 00:20:52,173
Well, because...
401
00:20:52,793 --> 00:20:55,343
I have a very busy day scheduled for us.
402
00:20:58,131 --> 00:20:59,341
Oh... Ugh.
403
00:21:05,389 --> 00:21:08,349
[ELLIOTT] Y'all know,
Jell-O used to be a delicacy.
404
00:21:09,017 --> 00:21:10,347
You know, in order to make it,
405
00:21:10,435 --> 00:21:12,595
you gotta boil down a
whole mess of hooves...
406
00:21:12,688 --> 00:21:14,898
you know, horses, cows,
pigs, it doesn't matter.
407
00:21:14,982 --> 00:21:18,192
But not everybody has a mess
of hooves just lying around.
408
00:21:18,652 --> 00:21:19,742
It wasn't until, uh...
409
00:21:20,404 --> 00:21:21,954
a couple of sassy New Yorkers
410
00:21:22,781 --> 00:21:25,831
figured out how to dry it
out so that the rest of us
411
00:21:26,451 --> 00:21:29,161
could have a... a chance
to enjoy this ambrosia.
412
00:21:29,746 --> 00:21:31,416
If we have some, will you shut up?
413
00:21:31,832 --> 00:21:32,832
Maybe.
414
00:21:33,959 --> 00:21:34,959
Here.
415
00:21:41,675 --> 00:21:42,675
How you feeling?
416
00:21:43,010 --> 00:21:44,430
Pretty shitty, to be honest.
417
00:21:44,511 --> 00:21:46,971
Where would you say you are
on a scale from one to...
418
00:21:47,306 --> 00:21:48,556
ending all life on this planet?
419
00:21:49,099 --> 00:21:50,099
Really?
420
00:21:50,851 --> 00:21:53,561
Diego, put the knife away,
you idiot. She's fine.
421
00:21:53,645 --> 00:21:56,355
The last time I saw this one,
she had me suspended midair,
422
00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:58,940
sucking the life out of
me with energy tentacles.
423
00:21:59,026 --> 00:22:01,106
I think I'm allowed a
little time to process.
424
00:22:01,194 --> 00:22:03,324
Oh, I would love to see
an energy tentacle.
425
00:22:03,405 --> 00:22:06,235
I don't remember what
I did, but I'm sorry...
426
00:22:07,784 --> 00:22:09,374
if... if that means anything.
427
00:22:12,331 --> 00:22:13,331
It does.
428
00:22:14,082 --> 00:22:15,792
Just going through a lot right now.
429
00:22:15,876 --> 00:22:16,876
There's this...
430
00:22:18,170 --> 00:22:19,300
girl that I like.
431
00:22:19,713 --> 00:22:22,133
I thought she liked me,
but turns out that she's...
432
00:22:22,215 --> 00:22:23,465
- [DOOR OPENS]
- [ALLISON LAUGHS]
433
00:22:23,467 --> 00:22:24,507
Oh, thank God.
434
00:22:25,010 --> 00:22:26,350
[ALLISON] Is anyone here?
435
00:22:26,428 --> 00:22:27,678
Hello?
436
00:22:27,763 --> 00:22:30,160
[KLAUS] Le petit mort, le petit mort.
437
00:22:30,170 --> 00:22:31,180
[ALLISON] What?
438
00:22:31,200 --> 00:22:33,183
- You don't speak French.
- [KLAUS] It's "the little death."
439
00:22:33,185 --> 00:22:36,475
- [BOTH CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY]
- [ALLISON LAUGHING]
440
00:22:36,563 --> 00:22:38,943
[KLAUS] Oh, wow. Look at this old stuff.
441
00:22:40,192 --> 00:22:42,072
Oh, wow.
442
00:22:42,486 --> 00:22:44,816
I know this is impossible, but...
443
00:22:45,280 --> 00:22:48,280
did we all get sexier?
444
00:22:58,752 --> 00:22:59,752
Vanya.
445
00:23:01,505 --> 00:23:02,875
I can't believe I have a sister.
446
00:23:13,558 --> 00:23:14,728
I missed you.
447
00:23:16,561 --> 00:23:19,361
Thank God someone did. [CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
448
00:23:22,609 --> 00:23:23,859
[BOTH CHUCKLE SOFTLY]
449
00:23:28,365 --> 00:23:30,365
- [KLAUS GRUNTS]
- Oh, you are drunk.
450
00:23:30,450 --> 00:23:33,410
Yeah. No, just a little... just a few...
451
00:23:34,121 --> 00:23:36,501
Oh, that's so sweet.
452
00:23:37,499 --> 00:23:39,959
- No. Jesus.
- [VANYA GIGGLES]
453
00:23:40,460 --> 00:23:42,300
- Hi.
- Hey, Vanny.
454
00:23:42,671 --> 00:23:44,421
Klaus. Is Ben here?
455
00:23:44,798 --> 00:23:46,468
Oh, uh... no.
456
00:23:47,592 --> 00:23:50,642
No, unfortunately,
ghosts can't time travel.
457
00:23:51,179 --> 00:23:52,389
Are you kidding me?
458
00:23:54,182 --> 00:23:56,942
[FIVE] All right, then.
Let's get down to business.
459
00:23:58,562 --> 00:24:01,062
- [KLAUS] So, Vanny, what's new?
- Hey, Diego.
460
00:24:02,858 --> 00:24:04,858
- Can't say hi to nobody?
- Hi, Allison.
461
00:24:05,944 --> 00:24:06,994
What was that?
462
00:24:07,070 --> 00:24:08,820
- Hi, Allison!
- Thank you!
463
00:24:10,949 --> 00:24:12,659
[PURRING]
464
00:24:16,288 --> 00:24:18,288
[CATS MEOWING]
465
00:24:21,042 --> 00:24:22,212
Why are we here?
466
00:24:25,422 --> 00:24:28,012
[HANDLER] You were
always a climber, darling.
467
00:24:28,091 --> 00:24:29,511
[PURRING]
468
00:24:32,846 --> 00:24:33,846
[CAT YOWLS]
469
00:24:38,018 --> 00:24:39,518
[VACUUM WHIRRING]
470
00:24:43,523 --> 00:24:44,613
[CAT MEOWS]
471
00:24:45,317 --> 00:24:46,937
[SHUSHING]
472
00:24:52,365 --> 00:24:53,985
[LOUD THUDDING ON ROOF]
473
00:24:54,659 --> 00:24:55,659
[CLATTERING]
474
00:25:00,665 --> 00:25:02,665
[VACUUM CONTINUES WHIRRING]
475
00:25:06,796 --> 00:25:08,506
[CATS MEOWING]
476
00:25:43,667 --> 00:25:44,917
[MEOWING]
477
00:25:51,800 --> 00:25:53,930
All right. First off,
I wanna say I'm sorry.
478
00:25:54,010 --> 00:25:55,718
I know I really screwed
the pooch on this whole
479
00:25:55,720 --> 00:25:57,680
going-back-in-time-and-getting-stuck
thing.
480
00:25:58,306 --> 00:25:59,706
But the real kick in the pants here
481
00:25:59,766 --> 00:26:02,226
is we brought the end of the
world back here with us.
482
00:26:02,310 --> 00:26:04,020
Oh, my God, again?
483
00:26:06,606 --> 00:26:08,016
All of you knew?
484
00:26:08,108 --> 00:26:10,898
Why am I always the last one to
find out about the end of the...
485
00:26:10,986 --> 00:26:12,196
Oh, my God.
486
00:26:12,279 --> 00:26:15,739
My cult is gonna be so pissed. Five!
487
00:26:15,824 --> 00:26:18,294
I told them we had until 2019.
488
00:26:18,368 --> 00:26:20,448
We have until Monday. We have six days.
489
00:26:20,500 --> 00:26:21,510
Is it Vanya?
490
00:26:21,538 --> 00:26:23,868
- Klaus.
- [KLAUS] What? It's usually Vanya.
491
00:26:24,249 --> 00:26:25,459
Do you have any leads, Five?
492
00:26:26,585 --> 00:26:27,995
[FIVE] Yeah, we have one.
493
00:26:31,214 --> 00:26:33,634
- Holy shit, is that Dad?
- Yeah.
494
00:26:33,717 --> 00:26:35,887
- That's him?
- [DIEGO] Standing on the grassy knoll.
495
00:26:35,900 --> 00:26:37,458
Diego and I have been
trying to talk to Dad
496
00:26:37,460 --> 00:26:39,009
about what exactly this means.
497
00:26:39,097 --> 00:26:41,177
- So far, we've got nothing.
- Not nothing.
498
00:26:41,474 --> 00:26:43,349
- He's planning to kill Kennedy.
- [FIVE] Maybe.
499
00:26:43,351 --> 00:26:46,351
But we don't know who or what
sets doomsday in motion.
500
00:26:46,438 --> 00:26:49,228
Could be Kennedy, could be
something entirely independent.
501
00:26:49,316 --> 00:26:51,320
But if we know something
changes the timeline,
502
00:26:51,340 --> 00:26:52,400
we have to make it right.
503
00:26:52,420 --> 00:26:54,230
Yeah, but how, if we don't
know what's broken?
504
00:26:54,321 --> 00:26:55,481
[DIEGO] Come on. Do the math.
505
00:26:55,530 --> 00:26:58,740
We know Dad's having shady-ass
meetings with some shady-ass people.
506
00:26:58,825 --> 00:27:01,745
We know he's on the grassy knoll
in three days to kill the president.
507
00:27:01,828 --> 00:27:03,618
So I think we all know
what we have to do.
508
00:27:06,333 --> 00:27:07,673
- Find Dad.
- [DIEGO] Kill Dad.
509
00:27:10,545 --> 00:27:12,545
None of us are supposed
to be here, right?
510
00:27:12,922 --> 00:27:14,342
I mean, what if it's us?
511
00:27:14,716 --> 00:27:17,336
Has anyone here done anything
to screw up the timeline?
512
00:27:23,391 --> 00:27:25,330
Diego's been stalking Lee Harvey Oswald.
513
00:27:25,331 --> 00:27:26,601
And you're working for Jack Ruby.
514
00:27:26,603 --> 00:27:29,613
Allison has been very
involved in local politics.
515
00:27:29,689 --> 00:27:32,529
- Okay, you started a cult.
- Thank you!
516
00:27:32,609 --> 00:27:35,069
- I'm... I'm just a... a nanny on a farm.
- [GROWLS, HISSES]
517
00:27:35,153 --> 00:27:36,913
I don't have anything
to do with all of that.
518
00:27:36,988 --> 00:27:38,788
Well, maybe you do,
we just don't know it yet.
519
00:27:38,823 --> 00:27:39,993
[DIEGO WHISTLES SHARPLY]
520
00:27:40,450 --> 00:27:41,530
Listen to yourselves.
521
00:27:41,618 --> 00:27:43,698
Everything in our new lives
is connected to Kennedy.
522
00:27:43,787 --> 00:27:44,907
That can't be a coincidence.
523
00:27:44,996 --> 00:27:47,356
Luther works for Ruby, Allison
is protesting the government,
524
00:27:47,415 --> 00:27:49,415
Dad is on the grassy knoll, Klaus is...
525
00:27:50,126 --> 00:27:53,336
doing something weird and
pervy but probably related.
526
00:27:53,421 --> 00:27:54,711
See, clearly,
527
00:27:54,798 --> 00:27:57,758
we were all sent back here
for one special reason:
528
00:27:58,510 --> 00:28:00,890
saving John Fitzgerald Kennedy.
529
00:28:00,970 --> 00:28:02,760
[OVERLAPPING ARGUMENTS]
530
00:28:03,264 --> 00:28:04,814
[ARGUMENTS CONTINUE]
531
00:28:04,891 --> 00:28:07,981
- [DIEGO] This is bigger than all of us.
- [FIVE] Guys, you all die.
532
00:28:09,604 --> 00:28:11,154
I was there. I saw it.
533
00:28:12,148 --> 00:28:13,778
And I wanna forget it, but I can't.
534
00:28:15,068 --> 00:28:19,738
I saw Russian nukes vaporize
the world with all of you in it...
535
00:28:21,282 --> 00:28:23,702
in a war that never happened
until we brought it here.
536
00:28:23,785 --> 00:28:25,945
And Hazel gave his life to save us,
537
00:28:26,037 --> 00:28:28,667
so you may need to shut
up and just listen to me.
538
00:28:29,999 --> 00:28:33,499
I don't know if the things we've
experienced here are all connected.
539
00:28:34,379 --> 00:28:36,379
I don't know if there's a
reason for everything.
540
00:28:38,133 --> 00:28:39,133
But Dad will.
541
00:28:40,100 --> 00:28:41,157
We need to talk to him
542
00:28:41,170 --> 00:28:43,845
before everyone and
everything we know is dead.
543
00:28:44,222 --> 00:28:46,222
Okay, I'm out. [SIGHING]
544
00:28:46,307 --> 00:28:47,807
Did you even hear me, Luther?
545
00:28:47,892 --> 00:28:49,022
Yeah. Yeah, I did.
546
00:28:49,100 --> 00:28:50,880
I heard a 58-year-old man
547
00:28:50,900 --> 00:28:53,112
who still wants his daddy
to come and fix everything.
548
00:28:53,690 --> 00:28:55,070
Well, you can count me out.
549
00:28:56,109 --> 00:28:57,529
It's time we all grew the hell up.
550
00:28:57,610 --> 00:28:58,770
- [VANYA] Luther!
- Come back.
551
00:28:58,778 --> 00:29:00,858
- [KLAUS] Where you going?
- [LUTHER] Save it, Diego.
552
00:29:04,367 --> 00:29:05,487
[LUTHER SIGHS]
553
00:29:05,744 --> 00:29:07,794
No one leaves until we figure this out.
554
00:29:10,665 --> 00:29:12,035
[FIVE GRUNTING]
555
00:29:12,876 --> 00:29:13,876
Jeez...
556
00:29:14,711 --> 00:29:15,751
[EXHALES SHARPLY]
557
00:29:15,837 --> 00:29:18,257
When did the monkey
learn how to fight dirty?
558
00:29:18,882 --> 00:29:19,972
[ROCK CLATTERS]
559
00:29:22,969 --> 00:29:23,969
Son of a bitch.
560
00:29:39,944 --> 00:29:43,624
You know, I could really go for
some tacos right now. Allison?
561
00:29:43,698 --> 00:29:45,634
- Tacos?
- Shouldn't we wait?
562
00:29:45,635 --> 00:29:46,639
You know those guys.
563
00:29:46,640 --> 00:29:49,618
I mean, it could take forever
for them to bro it out.
564
00:29:49,704 --> 00:29:50,874
Vanya, tacos?
565
00:29:50,955 --> 00:29:54,730
Is there any way that tacos are
gonna cause the end of the world?
566
00:29:54,750 --> 00:29:55,760
[SCOFFS]
567
00:29:55,770 --> 00:29:58,301
I mean, there's only one way to
find out, right? [SNAPS FINGERS]
568
00:29:58,379 --> 00:29:59,837
- [ALLISON] Sure is.
- [KLAUS] Let's go!
569
00:29:59,839 --> 00:30:00,919
[GIGGLES]
570
00:30:04,803 --> 00:30:05,803
I've missed you all...
571
00:30:07,180 --> 00:30:08,260
so much.
572
00:30:10,558 --> 00:30:11,728
[SIGHS]
573
00:30:14,103 --> 00:30:16,733
- What's going on with you, big boy?
- Ugh, leave me alone, Diego.
574
00:30:16,815 --> 00:30:20,185
Huh? So, what, you're just gonna
sucker punch Five and haul ass, huh?
575
00:30:20,276 --> 00:30:23,396
Look, maybe trying to stop doomsday
is exactly what starts it.
576
00:30:23,488 --> 00:30:25,568
- Did you ever think of that?
- Oh, so we do nothing?
577
00:30:26,157 --> 00:30:27,317
Since when are you a quitter?
578
00:30:27,360 --> 00:30:29,540
Since the last time I
destroyed the world
579
00:30:29,570 --> 00:30:31,433
by overestimating my own importance.
580
00:30:33,400 --> 00:30:34,779
So this is about you never living up
581
00:30:34,780 --> 00:30:37,088
to the old man's
expectations bullshit, huh?
582
00:30:37,160 --> 00:30:39,080
[SCOFFS] Maybe.
583
00:30:39,100 --> 00:30:41,254
I don't know, I mean, we're all
crazy where Dad's concerned.
584
00:30:41,256 --> 00:30:42,336
Oh, I'm not.
585
00:30:42,590 --> 00:30:43,860
He's an asshole. I'm awesome.
586
00:30:43,880 --> 00:30:44,905
That's very simple.
587
00:30:44,926 --> 00:30:46,336
Have to understand that, okay?
588
00:30:47,762 --> 00:30:48,762
Okay.
589
00:30:49,472 --> 00:30:52,232
So why can't you leave JFK alone, hmm?
590
00:30:53,893 --> 00:30:54,893
I'm a hero.
591
00:30:55,436 --> 00:30:57,103
- Heroes stop crime.
- [LUTHER] No, no, no.
592
00:30:57,105 --> 00:30:59,765
No, Dad told you you're a hero.
593
00:31:00,191 --> 00:31:01,441
Right? He told all of us.
594
00:31:02,694 --> 00:31:03,744
But what if he lied?
595
00:31:04,863 --> 00:31:07,078
What if we're just a bunch of
freaks who have no business
596
00:31:07,080 --> 00:31:08,238
changing the world for everyone else?
597
00:31:08,240 --> 00:31:10,598
No, everyone changes the world, Luther.
598
00:31:10,970 --> 00:31:11,994
Everyone.
599
00:31:12,704 --> 00:31:14,874
And it's scary, but
that's kinda the deal.
600
00:31:15,331 --> 00:31:18,591
You know, you are so goddamn big,
601
00:31:18,960 --> 00:31:21,550
sometimes I forget what a
sensitive bastard you are.
602
00:31:24,591 --> 00:31:25,841
It's all gonna work out.
603
00:31:27,343 --> 00:31:29,973
- We're on the right path.
- Oh, yeah? How do you know?
604
00:31:31,220 --> 00:31:32,949
There's a long, black car
that's been following us
605
00:31:32,950 --> 00:31:34,516
since we left Elliott's.
606
00:31:34,976 --> 00:31:36,016
Six o'clock.
607
00:32:06,215 --> 00:32:07,875
[DIEGO] "To my pursuers: I...
608
00:32:09,344 --> 00:32:11,184
- Reginald Hargreeves... "
- What?
609
00:32:11,930 --> 00:32:14,390
"... request the pleasure of
your company for a light supper
610
00:32:14,474 --> 00:32:18,354
on the 20th of November,
1963, half past seven o'clock,
611
00:32:18,436 --> 00:32:20,606
1624 Magnolia Street."
612
00:32:22,941 --> 00:32:24,361
A "light" supper?
613
00:32:24,442 --> 00:32:27,242
[ANDREA LITKEI & ERVIN LITKEI'S
"HEY DA DA" PLAYS ON RADIO]
614
00:32:27,320 --> 00:32:29,240
♪ Hey Da Da, hey Da Da... ♪
615
00:32:29,322 --> 00:32:30,992
[ALLISON GROWLS, CHUCKLES]
616
00:32:31,199 --> 00:32:32,739
The nerve of that man.
617
00:32:32,825 --> 00:32:35,035
I mean, one thing goes wrong,
and he's on a warpath.
618
00:32:35,119 --> 00:32:37,709
I mean, doesn't know who I am?
619
00:32:37,997 --> 00:32:40,537
No, no. No, Ray,
you know exactly who I am.
620
00:32:40,625 --> 00:32:42,165
- You just can't handle it.
- Pew, pew.
621
00:32:42,251 --> 00:32:43,793
- [ALLISON] I'm protecting him.
- Pew, pew.
622
00:32:43,795 --> 00:32:45,505
- [SOFT SLAP]
- [KLAUS] Ow. From what?
623
00:32:45,588 --> 00:32:47,128
The end of the world, for one.
624
00:32:47,548 --> 00:32:50,218
Is the world really
gonna end in six days?
625
00:32:51,700 --> 00:32:53,080
Well, it did last time,
626
00:32:53,100 --> 00:32:55,137
and we did everything Five
could think of to stop it.
627
00:32:55,139 --> 00:32:58,809
Hey, wouldn't it be weird
if Five grew up all hot?
628
00:32:58,893 --> 00:33:00,059
- Wouldn't that be weird?
- What?
629
00:33:00,061 --> 00:33:01,221
- [ALLISON] Eww.
- [KLAUS] Oh!
630
00:33:01,270 --> 00:33:02,400
"Oh, eww! Eww!"
631
00:33:02,480 --> 00:33:05,070
Please, Miss "Luther was my lover."
632
00:33:05,149 --> 00:33:06,989
- [KISSING SOUNDS]
- We have never even kissed.
633
00:33:07,000 --> 00:33:08,600
Yeah, but you guys were making
634
00:33:08,620 --> 00:33:11,026
little sick moon-dog eyes at each other
635
00:33:11,114 --> 00:33:14,284
all through puberty and
breakfasts and all that.
636
00:33:14,993 --> 00:33:17,003
Aren't we all brothers
and sisters, or... ?
637
00:33:17,078 --> 00:33:19,748
- [KLAUS SNORTS]
- Well... technically, it...
638
00:33:19,831 --> 00:33:23,461
"Technically"? If you have to word...
use the word "technically,"
639
00:33:23,543 --> 00:33:24,923
you're already in trouble.
640
00:33:25,336 --> 00:33:27,836
- [GIGGLING]
- Okay, can... can we focus?
641
00:33:28,214 --> 00:33:31,594
I mean, clearly we're not saving the
world tonight, but maybe, maybe,
642
00:33:31,676 --> 00:33:33,966
we could at least try
to save my marriage.
643
00:33:34,053 --> 00:33:35,053
No!
644
00:33:35,722 --> 00:33:37,142
No, because that's like...
645
00:33:38,141 --> 00:33:41,851
that's like asking a nun
how to hump someone's leg.
646
00:33:42,270 --> 00:33:45,440
I mean, who in this room knows shit
about relationships? This one?
647
00:33:45,857 --> 00:33:48,187
In secret love with some farm Frau.
648
00:33:48,276 --> 00:33:50,276
- Her name's Sissy.
- Which is an improvement
649
00:33:50,361 --> 00:33:52,111
on her previous love interest,
650
00:33:52,196 --> 00:33:54,066
- the serial killer.
- What?
651
00:33:54,157 --> 00:33:56,357
- Meanwhile, I'm carrying a torch...
- [WHISPERS] Later.
652
00:33:56,492 --> 00:33:59,252
... for a soldier I haven't
technically met yet,
653
00:33:59,328 --> 00:34:01,458
and Luther is in love with his sister.
654
00:34:01,539 --> 00:34:04,539
Okay, again, we are not biological.
655
00:34:04,625 --> 00:34:07,995
Face it, the healthiest long-term
relationship in this family
656
00:34:08,379 --> 00:34:10,879
was when Five was
banging that mannequin.
657
00:34:11,632 --> 00:34:15,342
The only thing the Umbrella
Academy knows about love...
658
00:34:17,430 --> 00:34:19,680
is how to screw it up.
659
00:34:19,766 --> 00:34:22,726
- [MAN] You're listening to KBOX, Dallas.
- [ALLISON AND VANYA] Cheers.
660
00:34:22,810 --> 00:34:25,227
- ['60S MUSIC CONTINUES ON RADIO]
- How do you guys deal with this?
661
00:34:25,229 --> 00:34:26,229
What?
662
00:34:26,930 --> 00:34:28,980
I mean, all of it. The time travel,
663
00:34:29,000 --> 00:34:30,540
seeing the dead, the end of the world.
664
00:34:30,568 --> 00:34:32,488
[KLAUS] Well, I get really high.
665
00:34:32,570 --> 00:34:34,320
Allison... Allison...
666
00:34:35,073 --> 00:34:36,373
[WHISPERS] ... lies to herself.
667
00:34:37,283 --> 00:34:41,503
And you suppress all your
emotions deep, deep down
668
00:34:41,579 --> 00:34:44,249
until you... you blow shit up.
669
00:34:44,332 --> 00:34:46,922
Yeah, I'd really like
to not do that anymore.
670
00:34:47,335 --> 00:34:49,415
Well, you've got six days, missy.
671
00:34:50,046 --> 00:34:52,506
What the hell are we supposed
to do with six days?
672
00:34:52,620 --> 00:34:53,654
[KLAUS] Party?
673
00:34:53,674 --> 00:34:54,804
[SCOFFS] I don't know.
674
00:34:55,593 --> 00:34:57,303
I'm gonna tell Sissy that I love her.
675
00:34:58,679 --> 00:34:59,679
[SHARP EXHALE]
676
00:34:59,722 --> 00:35:01,562
I don't want any secrets.
677
00:35:01,641 --> 00:35:02,641
Yeah.
678
00:35:03,184 --> 00:35:04,274
[ALLISON] Yeah.
679
00:35:04,352 --> 00:35:05,442
Yeah, yeah, you're right.
680
00:35:05,853 --> 00:35:08,653
Yes, 'cause, you know, if...
if it's all gonna go tits-up,
681
00:35:09,023 --> 00:35:11,693
the least I could do is be
honest with my husband.
682
00:35:11,776 --> 00:35:14,776
Oh... does that mean
I have to face my cult?
683
00:35:15,196 --> 00:35:16,986
I just hate group breakups.
684
00:35:17,073 --> 00:35:18,953
It's why I stopped dating twins.
685
00:35:19,784 --> 00:35:21,164
This family's amazing.
686
00:35:21,536 --> 00:35:22,620
[KLAUS CACKLES]
687
00:35:22,630 --> 00:35:23,642
- Yeah, sure.
- Okay,
688
00:35:23,650 --> 00:35:24,829
let's not get ahead of ourselves.
689
00:35:24,831 --> 00:35:26,211
[KLAUS] Come here, Vanya.
690
00:35:26,290 --> 00:35:27,500
Come on.
691
00:35:27,875 --> 00:35:28,875
Get over here.
692
00:35:29,335 --> 00:35:31,295
- [KLAUS] I love you guys.
- [ALLISON LAUGHS]
693
00:35:31,379 --> 00:35:32,419
[KLAUS GROANS]
694
00:35:32,505 --> 00:35:34,085
[GASPS] Oh! You guys!
695
00:35:34,173 --> 00:35:35,383
I love this song!
696
00:35:35,842 --> 00:35:38,472
[SAM COOKE'S "TWISTIN'
THE NIGHT AWAY" PLAYS]
697
00:35:39,095 --> 00:35:41,845
♪ Let me tell you about a place ♪
698
00:35:41,931 --> 00:35:44,481
♪ Somewhere up a New York way ♪
699
00:35:45,143 --> 00:35:47,000
♪ Where the people are so gay ♪
700
00:35:47,013 --> 00:35:49,193
♪ And they're twistin' the night away ♪
701
00:35:49,689 --> 00:35:53,069
♪ They're twistin', twistin' ♪
702
00:35:53,151 --> 00:35:55,611
♪ Everybody's feeling great ♪
703
00:35:56,112 --> 00:35:58,362
♪ They're twistin', twistin' ♪
704
00:35:58,447 --> 00:36:00,907
♪ They're twistin' the night ♪
705
00:36:00,992 --> 00:36:02,872
- ♪ Let's twist a while! ♪
- ♪ Lean up ♪
706
00:36:04,912 --> 00:36:06,212
♪ Lean back ♪
707
00:36:07,915 --> 00:36:09,125
♪ Now twist ♪
708
00:36:10,793 --> 00:36:12,003
♪ Now lean back ♪
709
00:36:13,921 --> 00:36:15,341
♪ Watusi! ♪
710
00:36:17,049 --> 00:36:18,049
♪ Now fly ♪
711
00:36:20,011 --> 00:36:21,101
♪ Now twist ♪
712
00:36:22,597 --> 00:36:26,227
♪ They're twistin' the night away ♪
713
00:36:26,309 --> 00:36:29,229
♪ Twistin', they're twistin' the night ♪
714
00:36:29,312 --> 00:36:30,812
♪ One more time ♪
715
00:36:30,897 --> 00:36:31,897
♪ Lean up ♪
716
00:36:33,357 --> 00:36:34,527
♪ Lean back ♪
717
00:36:36,277 --> 00:36:37,397
♪ Lean up ♪
718
00:36:39,363 --> 00:36:40,573
♪ Lean back ♪
719
00:36:40,656 --> 00:36:41,816
[SONG FADES OUT]
720
00:36:41,908 --> 00:36:43,948
- [ALLISON LAUGHS]
- [ALLISON AND VANYA SIGHING]
721
00:36:44,035 --> 00:36:46,655
[SUSPENSEFUL INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYS]
722
00:37:00,885 --> 00:37:02,255
[BIRDS TWITTERING]
723
00:37:11,395 --> 00:37:12,935
[BUZZING]
724
00:37:21,072 --> 00:37:22,572
[TWIGS CRUNCHING]
725
00:37:37,255 --> 00:37:39,045
[METALLIC CLINK, WHIRRING]
726
00:38:04,782 --> 00:38:06,742
[TRAIN RUMBLING ALONG TRACKS]
727
00:38:07,326 --> 00:38:09,536
[TRAIN HORN BLOWS]
728
00:38:17,712 --> 00:38:19,842
[THE INTERRUPTERS' "BAD GUY" PLAYS]
729
00:38:21,424 --> 00:38:23,384
♪ Whoo ♪ [ECHOING]
730
00:38:24,885 --> 00:38:26,845
♪ Hey ♪ [ECHOING]
731
00:38:31,600 --> 00:38:32,850
♪ Whoo ♪ [ECHOING]
732
00:38:35,146 --> 00:38:36,856
♪ Hey... ♪ [ECHOING]
733
00:38:42,903 --> 00:38:44,703
What's your game, crazy lady?
734
00:38:44,780 --> 00:38:46,822
Who cares? You said if you
saw me again, you'd kill me.
735
00:38:46,824 --> 00:38:48,914
- Oh, I remember.
- Well, come on, big talker.
736
00:38:48,993 --> 00:38:50,493
- Let's get this done.
- All right.
737
00:38:51,620 --> 00:38:53,330
- [GRUNTS]
- [LILA CHUCKLES]
738
00:38:53,414 --> 00:38:54,794
♪ ... So criminal ♪
739
00:38:55,583 --> 00:38:58,753
♪ Bruises on both my knees for you ♪
740
00:38:58,836 --> 00:39:01,416
♪ Don't say thank you or please ♪
741
00:39:01,505 --> 00:39:05,335
♪ I do what I want when I'm wanting to ♪
742
00:39:05,426 --> 00:39:08,346
♪ My soul, so cynical ♪
743
00:39:08,429 --> 00:39:11,639
♪ So you're a tough guy ♪
♪ Like it really rough guy ♪
744
00:39:11,724 --> 00:39:15,194
♪ Just can't get enough guy ♪
♪ Chest always so puffed guy ♪
745
00:39:15,728 --> 00:39:18,398
♪ I'm that bad type ♪
♪ Make your mama sad type ♪
746
00:39:18,481 --> 00:39:22,531
♪ Make your girlfriend mad type ♪
♪ Might seduce your dad type ♪
747
00:39:22,818 --> 00:39:25,568
♪ I'm the bad guy ♪
748
00:39:26,572 --> 00:39:27,572
♪ Duh ♪
749
00:39:27,948 --> 00:39:29,158
[LILA] I'm waiting.
750
00:39:32,828 --> 00:39:35,918
- ♪ I'm the bad guy ♪
- [LILA LAUGHS]
751
00:39:36,290 --> 00:39:37,460
Fed up yet, Five?
752
00:39:40,920 --> 00:39:44,420
♪ So you're a tough guy ♪
♪ Like it really rough guy ♪
753
00:39:44,507 --> 00:39:48,007
♪ Just can't get enough guy ♪
♪ Chest always so puffed guy ♪
754
00:39:48,427 --> 00:39:51,347
♪ I'm that bad type ♪
♪ Make your mama sad type ♪
755
00:39:51,430 --> 00:39:55,100
♪ Make your girlfriend mad type ♪
♪ Might seduce your dad type ♪
756
00:39:55,351 --> 00:39:58,191
- ♪ I'm the bad guy ♪
- [LILA GRUNTING]
757
00:39:58,896 --> 00:40:00,726
- [LILA CRIES OUT]
- [SONG FADING]
758
00:40:01,690 --> 00:40:03,400
[WHEEZES] You're better than I thought.
759
00:40:03,484 --> 00:40:05,244
And you are entirely average.
760
00:40:05,319 --> 00:40:06,319
[SOFT CHOKING]
761
00:40:07,154 --> 00:40:08,414
You can come out now.
762
00:40:13,744 --> 00:40:14,744
Well done.
763
00:40:16,163 --> 00:40:17,333
You figured it out.
764
00:40:17,415 --> 00:40:18,915
Well, it wasn't very hard.
765
00:40:19,500 --> 00:40:22,040
She fights like every one
of you Commission drones.
766
00:40:22,670 --> 00:40:23,670
[HANDLER] Hmm.
767
00:40:24,422 --> 00:40:25,672
No matter, here we are.
768
00:40:26,048 --> 00:40:27,128
Together again.
769
00:40:28,300 --> 00:40:29,510
I've gotta ask...
770
00:40:30,719 --> 00:40:32,599
did you miss me, you little shit?
771
00:40:32,680 --> 00:40:35,140
[LILA COUGHS, LAUGHS]
772
00:40:38,394 --> 00:40:40,864
[SOFT, INDISTINCT CHATTER ON TV NEARBY]
773
00:40:51,031 --> 00:40:52,031
[VANYA] Sissy.
774
00:40:52,491 --> 00:40:53,491
[SOFTLY] Vanya.
775
00:40:53,617 --> 00:40:55,487
Don't sneak up on me like that.
776
00:40:55,995 --> 00:40:56,995
Where have you been?
777
00:40:57,079 --> 00:40:58,539
Uh, family reunion.
778
00:40:58,914 --> 00:41:00,754
Are you... drunk?
779
00:41:02,126 --> 00:41:03,126
Does it matter?
780
00:41:03,752 --> 00:41:05,092
[SCOFFING CHUCKLE]
781
00:41:06,839 --> 00:41:09,679
[VANYA] What matters is
I have feelings... okay?
782
00:41:11,010 --> 00:41:12,850
And I... I feel things for you.
783
00:41:12,928 --> 00:41:15,808
- Vanya, now's not a good time.
- No. Now's the only time.
784
00:41:15,890 --> 00:41:17,770
'Cause how much time do we have left?
785
00:41:17,933 --> 00:41:20,813
We could have years, we could have
days, but we only have one life.
786
00:41:20,895 --> 00:41:22,605
And we gotta go with our hearts.
787
00:41:22,688 --> 00:41:24,058
And my heart wants to go with you.
788
00:41:24,565 --> 00:41:25,565
[CARL] Sissy!
789
00:41:26,300 --> 00:41:27,979
What happened to that beer, girl?
790
00:41:27,980 --> 00:41:28,992
Oh, shit.
791
00:41:29,069 --> 00:41:32,359
You caught me naked as
a jaybird. [CHUCKLES]
792
00:41:33,532 --> 00:41:35,582
I guess it was bound to
happen sooner or later.
793
00:41:35,659 --> 00:41:37,579
- [BOTTLE CLINKS]
- That's all right.
794
00:41:38,120 --> 00:41:39,620
You're part of the family.
795
00:41:44,043 --> 00:41:45,503
Don't you dawdle, now.
796
00:41:51,050 --> 00:41:52,640
[SOMBER PIANO MELODY PLAYS]
797
00:41:52,718 --> 00:41:53,718
[DOOR SHUTS]
798
00:41:54,637 --> 00:41:55,717
You slept with him?
799
00:41:56,263 --> 00:41:57,393
He's still my husband.
800
00:41:57,848 --> 00:41:59,178
Who you don't love anymore.
801
00:41:59,266 --> 00:42:00,726
Just be a little patient
802
00:42:00,809 --> 00:42:03,059
- while I figure things...
- What is there to figure out?
803
00:42:03,604 --> 00:42:05,194
I see you. I see you miserable.
804
00:42:05,272 --> 00:42:07,862
- Who gets to be happy all the time?
- We can!
805
00:42:07,940 --> 00:42:09,198
We were just talking about leaving.
806
00:42:09,200 --> 00:42:11,591
Honey, that was just morning talk,
807
00:42:11,612 --> 00:42:14,072
lies we tell each other to
get through the damn day.
808
00:42:14,156 --> 00:42:15,946
We don't get to live our fantasies.
809
00:42:17,243 --> 00:42:18,333
[SISSY SIGHS]
810
00:42:21,455 --> 00:42:22,615
You know, Vanya...
811
00:42:23,541 --> 00:42:25,421
[VOICE TREMBLES] ... maybe
when you can remember
812
00:42:25,459 --> 00:42:26,749
what your real life was like,
813
00:42:26,835 --> 00:42:29,505
you'll feel less inclined to
tell people how to live theirs.
814
00:42:29,588 --> 00:42:32,508
You know nothing of the
pressures I'm under.
815
00:42:33,592 --> 00:42:35,672
I know we're running out of
time for you to be brave.
816
00:42:36,011 --> 00:42:37,051
What does that mean?
817
00:42:38,180 --> 00:42:39,220
Six days.
818
00:42:40,057 --> 00:42:41,227
We've got six days.
819
00:42:41,308 --> 00:42:44,138
- Six days until what?
- I can't explain, okay?
820
00:42:44,311 --> 00:42:46,901
- Just, we need to go now, please.
- [SISSY WHISPERS] Vanya.
821
00:42:46,981 --> 00:42:49,571
- [VANYA] Please, come. Please...
- Vanya. Vanya. Vanya!
822
00:42:49,692 --> 00:42:51,822
I can't.
823
00:42:58,867 --> 00:43:01,497
[MY KULLSVIK'S "HELLO
(SWEDISH COVER)" PLAYS]
824
00:43:04,206 --> 00:43:05,206
[SISSY] Vanya.
825
00:43:05,583 --> 00:43:07,543
- [PANTING] Vanya, wait!
- [DOOR OPENS]
826
00:43:07,918 --> 00:43:09,418
- [DOOR SLAMS SHUT]
- [SISSY SIGHS]
827
00:43:11,880 --> 00:43:13,880
[BUGS CHIRRING]
828
00:43:22,933 --> 00:43:25,193
[MY KULLSVIK SINGS IN SWEDISH]
829
00:43:51,545 --> 00:43:55,795
[SCREAMS]
830
00:44:39,510 --> 00:44:41,390
[FOLLOWERS MURMURING]
831
00:44:41,470 --> 00:44:43,810
["HELLO (SWEDISH COVER)" CONTINUES]
832
00:44:44,473 --> 00:44:46,143
[OVERLAPPING CHATTER]
833
00:44:50,437 --> 00:44:52,647
Daddy's home.
834
00:44:58,028 --> 00:44:59,028
Ray?
835
00:44:59,613 --> 00:45:00,613
Sit your ass down.
836
00:45:00,698 --> 00:45:01,778
Sit down.
837
00:45:02,324 --> 00:45:04,624
Now, I... I've been doing
a lot of thinking and...
838
00:45:05,411 --> 00:45:06,451
and I've decided...
839
00:45:08,080 --> 00:45:09,420
[ALLISON EXHALES SHARPLY]
840
00:45:10,708 --> 00:45:12,418
... I'm gonna tell you everything.
841
00:45:16,171 --> 00:45:18,341
["HELLO (SWEDISH COVER)" CONTINUES]
842
00:45:25,764 --> 00:45:27,064
[SONG ENDS]
843
00:45:35,566 --> 00:45:38,486
[ROCK VIOLIN MUSIC PLAYING]