﻿1
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<i>Previously on</i> This Is Us...

2
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When I thought you weren't coming, I...

3
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I left you a voice mail.

4
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You mean the one where you belittled me

5
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and told me to grow the hell up?

6
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You know what, Randall, you still have

7
00:00:11,855 --> 00:00:13,031
that cot at your office?

8
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You should go sleep on it.

9
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I'm not sleeping in Philadelphia, Beth.

10
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We can't keep simmering
like this forever.

11
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Fine. You want to do this right now?

12
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Let's do this. Close the door.

13
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- Beth, if you think you...
- No. Mm-mm. Me first.

14
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I am looking at you right now,

15
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but I don't even recognize you.

16
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Because my husband,
the man that I married,

17
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would never talk to me the way

18
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that you did on that voice mail, ever.

19
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I know.

20
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And I'm sorry.

21
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That message was a gross misstep.

22
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A misstep? Randall,
your Coogi sweater phase

23
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in college, that's a misstep.

24
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Okay? What you said...

25
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What-what were your exact words?

26
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That I teach
"bored housewives how to twirl"?

27
00:00:56,828 --> 00:00:57,928
I didn't mean it.

28
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I was just...

29
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I was trying to hurt your feelings.

30
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I thought you were
standing me up, and I...

31
00:01:03,975 --> 00:01:05,509
Why would I stand you up?

32
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When have I ever not had your back?

33
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Never.

34
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But if we're being honest, Beth,

35
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our rhythm has been off.

36
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All right? It's been off for months.

37
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No, no. My rhythm is fine;
your rhythm is off.

38
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And it's off because you're not
getting what you want.

39
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- I'm not getting what I want?
- No. Because I refuse

40
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to give up my own life
to accommodate yours.

41
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I've never asked... Oh, my...

42
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I am killing myself

43
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driving to Philly and back every day.

44
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If I'm lucky, I get a chance

45
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to catch the girls
before they go to bed.

46
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If not, then I'm stuck sleeping
on a pull-out in my office.

47
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I'm not even sworn in yet, Beth,
and I am already swamped.

48
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But I still make it back
for your dance recital.

49
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And I still make it home
to watch the girls

50
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every time you have an evening class,

51
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because I want you
to have your own life.

52
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No, you don't.

53
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You just realized
I'm not gonna stop teaching,

54
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but you are definitely not on board.

55
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No, no. For the past 20 years,
I have stood by your side

56
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through every whim, every pipe dream,

57
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every flight of fancy
that you can think of.

58
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And for the first time, the first time,

59
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I have a flight of fancy.

60
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Something that I want.

61
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And still, it becomes about you.

62
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Damn it, Randall, we have been
having the same fight since we met.

63
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♪

64
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- Oh.
- Oh, I... I-I'm sorry.

65
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No problem.

66
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synced and corrected by susinz
*www.addic7ed.com*

67
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Kevin, she's not just any ol' girl.

68
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<i>KEVIN (ON PHONE): Yes, she is.</i>

69
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That's exactly what she is, man.
Ask her out.

70
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I can't just walk up
to Beth Clarke and go,

71
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"Hey, Beth, I'm Randall...
you know, the guy

72
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who holds the door open
for everyone in econ class

73
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just so he can casually
hold it open for you

74
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without it being weird." Yeah, that guy.

75
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<i>Want to go grab a pizza or something?"</i>

76
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You're definitely gonna die a virgin.

77
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- I'm not gonna die a virgin.
- You might.

78
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Shut up, Nathan, and stop
listening to my phone calls.

79
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- Forget it.
<i>- No, dude.</i>

80
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I'm sorry. I... Don't hang up.

81
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Um, Sophie's in class all day.
I lost my MetroCard.

82
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New York sucks.

83
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<i>I want to help. Um...</i>

84
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Call Beth's dorm.

85
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<i>Use a different phone so I can listen,</i>

86
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<i>and I'll tell you what to say.</i>

87
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- Are you serious?
- Yeah.

88
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Trust me. Steve Martin did it

89
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in that movie where he's got
the-the big nose, and I have...

90
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<i>way more game than him.</i>

91
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(PHONE RINGING)

92
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Hello.

93
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Kev, she picked up. She picked up, Kev.

94
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Great. Tell her,

95
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"You don't know who I am,
but you're about to."

96
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- I'm not saying that.
<i>- Do you want my help or not?</i>

97
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<i>BETH: Hello?</i>

98
00:04:22,764 --> 00:04:26,835
Hey. You may not know who I am,
but you're about to.

99
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Who is this?

100
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Rand... Randall Pearson.

101
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Oh. Uh... (CHUCKLES) Randall.

102
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What's going on?

103
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She asked me what's going on.

104
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Tell her you're taking her
to dinner tomorrow night,

105
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and you want to know what time
to pick her up.

106
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(CHUCKLING): Hey, so...

107
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I'm gonna take you out
to dinner tomorrow night.

108
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What time should I come pick you up?

109
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U-Um, Randall, are you...
are you asking me out?

110
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Yes.

111
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<i>I guess I am.</i>

112
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Okay. Um...

113
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Uh, 7 o'clock?

114
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Really?

115
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Yeah, I'll go out with you.

116
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<i>Once.</i>

117
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<i>Okay, so I'll see you tomorrow, then.</i>

118
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- Holy crap.
- Holy crap.

119
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(SHRIEKS, LAUGHS)

120
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(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

121
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(CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING)

122
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I was surprised you said yes.

123
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You probably get asked out
on dates all the time.

124
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Not really.

125
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You're an architecture major.

126
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I thought you might want to study dance.

127
00:06:02,775 --> 00:06:04,977
No. What made you think that?

128
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I asked around about you.

129
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Well, you got some bad Intel.

130
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I used to dance, but not anymore.

131
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RANDALL: Hmm. Ever?

132
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Like, if someone put on some
<i>Miseducation of Lauryn Hill right now,</i>

133
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you wouldn't cut a rug?

134
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(LAUGHS) Okay. Um, well, first of all,

135
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you don't dance to Lauryn Hill;
you groove.

136
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And secondly, who says "cut a rug"?

137
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A lot of people say "cut a rug."

138
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White people.

139
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Well, I was raised by white people.

140
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I'm adopted.

141
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You'd be surprised how hard that is

142
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to ease in the conversation.

143
00:06:45,736 --> 00:06:47,777
Mm. Yeah, I didn't know.

144
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Well, maybe you should
have asked around about me.

145
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I was dropped off at a
fire station the day I was born.

146
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And a fireman brought me to a hospital,

147
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and my dad convinced my mom to adopt me.

148
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He died earlier this year.

149
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(CHUCKLING): My dad.

150
00:07:18,670 --> 00:07:20,138
It was a heart attack, and...

151
00:07:26,931 --> 00:07:28,131
I'm sorry, Beth.

152
00:07:28,415 --> 00:07:29,591
Uh...

153
00:07:30,779 --> 00:07:32,052
I'm not used to saying that...

154
00:07:33,136 --> 00:07:34,568
out loud yet. I'm sorry.

155
00:07:37,745 --> 00:07:38,951
Um...

156
00:07:39,557 --> 00:07:42,607
Uh, my dad passed away last year.

157
00:07:44,022 --> 00:07:45,709
He was sick for a while,

158
00:07:45,734 --> 00:07:48,897
but it still felt so sudden.

159
00:07:51,346 --> 00:07:52,483
Yeah.

160
00:07:57,317 --> 00:07:58,749
I think we're ready to order.

161
00:07:59,522 --> 00:08:00,978
Sorry, but my manager asked

162
00:08:01,003 --> 00:08:02,960
if you could pay for your meal first.

163
00:08:06,311 --> 00:08:08,746
Um, is there something wrong?

164
00:08:09,398 --> 00:08:11,390
WAITER: No, it's a restaurant policy.

165
00:08:12,929 --> 00:08:15,507
Well, did-did all these people
pay for their meal in advance,

166
00:08:15,532 --> 00:08:17,796
or is that policy just for us?

167
00:08:17,821 --> 00:08:19,398
Beth, it's fine.

168
00:08:19,729 --> 00:08:21,367
You know, we probably just, you know,

169
00:08:21,392 --> 00:08:23,570
look a little young to be here, I guess.

170
00:08:23,595 --> 00:08:26,129
So I'll pay. The money's right here.

171
00:08:26,930 --> 00:08:29,367
Uh, I don't know how much the

172
00:08:29,392 --> 00:08:31,016
- check is gonna be, but...
- Okay, okay. No, um...

173
00:08:31,041 --> 00:08:32,110
Randall, no, put your checkbook away.

174
00:08:32,135 --> 00:08:33,500
We're not... we're not eating here.

175
00:08:33,525 --> 00:08:34,875
Excuse me. Excuse me.

176
00:08:35,614 --> 00:08:37,008
Hey, Beth. Beth, wait up.

177
00:08:37,936 --> 00:08:39,055
Beth.

178
00:08:41,245 --> 00:08:42,712
Beth. Beth, wait up.

179
00:08:42,737 --> 00:08:43,844
Wait up, Beth.

180
00:08:44,321 --> 00:08:46,031
You were actually gonna
hand over your check

181
00:08:46,056 --> 00:08:48,281
- like that was okay.
- Of course it isn't okay,

182
00:08:48,306 --> 00:08:50,446
but I-I didn't want to ruin the date.

183
00:08:51,766 --> 00:08:54,110
Okay, okay, look, Randall,
you're a very nice guy,

184
00:08:54,135 --> 00:08:56,298
and everyone at school has been
trying to set me up with you

185
00:08:56,323 --> 00:08:58,188
'cause we're pretty much
the only two black kids there,

186
00:08:58,213 --> 00:09:00,165
but you're just...

187
00:09:00,675 --> 00:09:02,110
(SIGHS) Y-You're-You're a lot.

188
00:09:02,424 --> 00:09:05,326
And this date was a lot.

189
00:09:05,630 --> 00:09:06,868
What do you mean?

190
00:09:09,176 --> 00:09:13,658
Um, you want to know what
my idea of the perfect date is?

191
00:09:14,271 --> 00:09:15,470
It's nachos.

192
00:09:15,495 --> 00:09:17,353
It's-it's ginger beer and nachos.

193
00:09:17,524 --> 00:09:18,931
This? All this,

194
00:09:18,956 --> 00:09:21,220
this-this restaurant
and-and the flowers,

195
00:09:21,245 --> 00:09:23,814
and... I mean, you're in a suit and tie.

196
00:09:23,839 --> 00:09:26,595
It is 78 degrees right now.
Aren't you hot?

197
00:09:26,620 --> 00:09:28,181
I mean, it's a little hot, yeah, but...

198
00:09:28,206 --> 00:09:29,806
Then take off the stupid jacket.

199
00:09:29,831 --> 00:09:31,087
It's not a stupid jacket.

200
00:09:33,372 --> 00:09:34,674
You're trying to start a fight with me,

201
00:09:34,699 --> 00:09:36,166
but I don't want to fight with you.

202
00:09:36,778 --> 00:09:38,635
I-I grew up in a house
with parents who didn't fight.

203
00:09:38,660 --> 00:09:40,330
I... I mean,

204
00:09:40,987 --> 00:09:42,697
Th-they-they fought once.

205
00:09:42,722 --> 00:09:44,290
It-it was actually pretty rough.

206
00:09:44,315 --> 00:09:46,307
I came home early
and watched the entire thing...

207
00:09:46,332 --> 00:09:47,856
Okay, Randall, I've known you
for ten minutes.

208
00:09:47,881 --> 00:09:49,596
Just... stop telling me this stuff.

209
00:09:49,621 --> 00:09:51,222
- It's-it's too much.
- Beth.

210
00:09:51,630 --> 00:09:54,291
B-Beth. Stop it.

211
00:09:55,201 --> 00:09:56,971
You can't just walk off like that.

212
00:09:58,294 --> 00:10:00,519
This jacket i-is the nicest thing I own,

213
00:10:00,544 --> 00:10:02,808
and I-I wore it because I wanted
to look nice for you.

214
00:10:02,873 --> 00:10:04,831
These flowers?
I didn't know what you'd like,

215
00:10:04,856 --> 00:10:06,292
so I bought four bouquets.

216
00:10:06,615 --> 00:10:08,871
My dorm is literally covered
in flowers. I...

217
00:10:10,575 --> 00:10:13,058
I-I just thought you deserved
a great first date.

218
00:10:13,997 --> 00:10:15,105
(SIGHS)

219
00:10:15,387 --> 00:10:16,683
I think you deserve everything.

220
00:10:20,610 --> 00:10:21,863
Um...

221
00:10:23,989 --> 00:10:25,613
I-I have to go, Randall.

222
00:10:26,254 --> 00:10:27,767
Again, you're-you're a very nice guy,

223
00:10:27,792 --> 00:10:29,379
but please don't call me again.

224
00:10:30,528 --> 00:10:31,754
(RANDALL SIGHS)

225
00:10:43,685 --> 00:10:45,786
So? How'd it go?

226
00:10:47,520 --> 00:10:48,817
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY) Good.

227
00:10:49,919 --> 00:10:51,114
I'm gonna marry her.

228
00:10:52,681 --> 00:10:53,895
(CHUCKLES)

229
00:11:07,615 --> 00:11:08,489
♪

230
00:11:08,513 --> 00:11:10,841
♪ <i>Who knew we'd make it this far?</i> ♪

231
00:11:11,534 --> 00:11:14,069
♪ <i>Then I think about, where would I be</i> ♪

232
00:11:14,094 --> 00:11:16,653
- ♪ <i>If we were to just fall apart?</i> ♪
- (BETH LAUGHING)

233
00:11:16,874 --> 00:11:18,628
♪ <i>And I can't stand</i>
<i>the thought of losing you</i> ♪

234
00:11:18,648 --> 00:11:20,404
(SINGING ALONG):
♪ <i>Meet me at the altar</i> ♪

235
00:11:20,429 --> 00:11:22,123
♪ <i>In your white dress</i> ♪

236
00:11:22,928 --> 00:11:26,694
♪ <i>We ain't getting no younger,</i>
<i>we might as well do it</i> ♪

237
00:11:26,966 --> 00:11:30,905
♪ <i>Been feeling you all the</i>
<i>while, girl, I must confess</i> ♪

238
00:11:31,689 --> 00:11:33,882
♪ <i>Girl, let's just get married</i> ♪

239
00:11:33,907 --> 00:11:36,233
♪ <i>I just want to get married...</i> ♪

240
00:11:36,258 --> 00:11:38,601
Beth, love of my life,

241
00:11:39,754 --> 00:11:41,156
will you marry me?

242
00:11:42,952 --> 00:11:44,445
♪ <i>We might as well do it...</i> ♪

243
00:11:44,470 --> 00:11:45,648
I need to work.

244
00:11:45,774 --> 00:11:48,209
- You need to stop proposing.
- So, is that a "yes"?

245
00:11:48,380 --> 00:11:49,640
It's a "not yet."

246
00:11:51,432 --> 00:11:52,523
Ah.

247
00:11:53,834 --> 00:11:56,703
Well, at least we're getting closer.

248
00:11:57,388 --> 00:11:59,656
When I proposed on the jumbotron
at the Pirates game,

249
00:11:59,681 --> 00:12:01,218
you said, "Hell no,"

250
00:12:01,243 --> 00:12:03,377
so "not yet" is a step
in the right direction.

251
00:12:03,402 --> 00:12:04,769
- Baby?
- I... Yeah.

252
00:12:05,609 --> 00:12:06,946
You are it for me.

253
00:12:07,213 --> 00:12:09,797
After seven unbelievable years,

254
00:12:09,822 --> 00:12:11,516
you think I want to break in
another boyfriend?

255
00:12:11,541 --> 00:12:12,633
(CHUCKLES)

256
00:12:12,823 --> 00:12:14,547
I'm just not ready to get married.

257
00:12:14,689 --> 00:12:16,922
- We don't have to rush.
- I know.

258
00:12:17,007 --> 00:12:18,227
BETH: Mmm.

259
00:12:19,479 --> 00:12:21,547
♪ <i>I want to give you my all</i> ♪

260
00:12:21,572 --> 00:12:25,758
♪ <i>Do you think about</i>
<i>maybe us having some babies?</i> ♪

261
00:12:25,783 --> 00:12:27,836
♪ <i>Come on,</i>
<i>won't you be my lady forever?</i> ♪

262
00:12:27,861 --> 00:12:29,195
RANDALL: Mmm. Wait.

263
00:12:30,037 --> 00:12:31,368
Oh, we got to get out of here,

264
00:12:31,393 --> 00:12:33,368
or we're gonna be late
for Sunday dinner at my mom's.

265
00:12:33,393 --> 00:12:36,501
Well, what if we don't do,
uh, Sunday dinner tonight?

266
00:12:37,363 --> 00:12:38,759
You don't want to have dinner at Mom's?

267
00:12:39,219 --> 00:12:40,786
Yeah, no, that... I mean,

268
00:12:40,811 --> 00:12:42,751
we just have dinner
at your mom's every Sunday.

269
00:12:44,581 --> 00:12:46,283
We could go miniature golfing.

270
00:12:46,476 --> 00:12:48,710
You and I haven't been
miniature golfing in a while.

271
00:12:48,735 --> 00:12:52,314
- Ooh, mini golf used to be our jam.
- Yeah.

272
00:12:52,465 --> 00:12:53,798
I bet Mom's gonna love that.

273
00:12:53,901 --> 00:12:55,806
♪ <i>Been feeling you</i>
<i>all the while, girl...</i> ♪

274
00:12:56,127 --> 00:12:58,416
I am having so much fun.

275
00:12:59,144 --> 00:13:00,884
Maybe next time we can go bowling.

276
00:13:01,151 --> 00:13:02,361
Yeah, maybe.

277
00:13:06,649 --> 00:13:08,025
So, Rebecca, you seeing anyone?

278
00:13:08,183 --> 00:13:09,580
- Me? No.
- Yeah.

279
00:13:09,994 --> 00:13:12,080
You know, one of my professors
is recently separated,

280
00:13:12,105 --> 00:13:14,111
- and he is totally into...
- No, no, no, no. No, Beth.

281
00:13:14,136 --> 00:13:17,173
No, thank you. Sorry, but I'm-I'm fine.

282
00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:21,627
All I want is for my kids
to find the right people

283
00:13:21,652 --> 00:13:24,276
and, you know, settle down,

284
00:13:24,301 --> 00:13:26,669
maybe say yes to one of their proposals

285
00:13:26,694 --> 00:13:27,986
- at some point.
- (RANDALL WHOOPS)

286
00:13:28,011 --> 00:13:30,666
Okay, Randall one, farmhouse zero.

287
00:13:30,767 --> 00:13:32,158
Babe, I took your turn, so...

288
00:13:32,244 --> 00:13:33,408
- Mom, you're up.
- Okay.

289
00:13:33,433 --> 00:13:36,447
Did you tell your mom
about all of the proposals?

290
00:13:40,307 --> 00:13:41,307
Yes?

291
00:13:41,332 --> 00:13:42,979
Including the one where we were...

292
00:13:43,004 --> 00:13:44,861
I-I told it to her very tastefully.

293
00:13:45,034 --> 00:13:46,572
I didn't give her any details.

294
00:13:48,214 --> 00:13:50,425
What? It's normal to tell
your mom about proposing.

295
00:13:50,450 --> 00:13:52,456
There is nothing normal about this.

296
00:13:52,481 --> 00:13:53,971
- Honestly, Beth, it's my fault.
- Rebecca.

297
00:13:53,996 --> 00:13:55,175
- I shouldn't...
- Rebecca, I'm trying to have

298
00:13:55,200 --> 00:13:56,964
a private conversation
with Randall right now.

299
00:13:56,989 --> 00:13:59,123
Sorry. I'll let you two
have your own conversation.

300
00:13:59,148 --> 00:14:00,846
No. Mom. Mom.

301
00:14:02,690 --> 00:14:04,706
Beth, if you have
something to say, say it.

302
00:14:05,135 --> 00:14:07,557
Really, Randall?
You want to do this right now?

303
00:14:09,172 --> 00:14:10,205
Fine.

304
00:14:10,495 --> 00:14:13,003
I love you,
but I'm not ready to get married

305
00:14:13,028 --> 00:14:14,695
because I haven't figured out
my life yet,

306
00:14:14,720 --> 00:14:15,871
and I don't want...

307
00:14:16,458 --> 00:14:18,981
What? What don't you want?

308
00:14:19,006 --> 00:14:23,020
I don't want my life
to be consumed by my husband's.

309
00:14:23,381 --> 00:14:25,277
And, Randall, I love you, but...

310
00:14:25,807 --> 00:14:27,481
you consume things.

311
00:14:30,031 --> 00:14:31,574
Well, let me put your mind at ease.

312
00:14:32,129 --> 00:14:34,331
You don't have to worry
about me proposing again.

313
00:14:35,291 --> 00:14:36,996
- Randall, that's not even what I...
- No, I need a minute.

314
00:14:37,021 --> 00:14:39,074
All right? I'll see you two by the car.

315
00:14:50,240 --> 00:14:51,434
May I?

316
00:15:02,126 --> 00:15:03,786
Rebecca, I didn't mean to say that.

317
00:15:03,811 --> 00:15:06,402
- I'm so sorry.
- No, no. It's-it's fine, Beth.

318
00:15:06,884 --> 00:15:09,513
You think I want my son
ending up with some wallflower?

319
00:15:09,596 --> 00:15:10,826
No.

320
00:15:12,963 --> 00:15:14,568
I'm glad it's gonna be you.

321
00:15:16,260 --> 00:15:17,505
- Really?
- Mm-hmm.

322
00:15:19,019 --> 00:15:20,396
Marriage is...

323
00:15:21,796 --> 00:15:23,115
complicated.

324
00:15:26,434 --> 00:15:29,060
I know my son's passions
tend to overwhelm,

325
00:15:29,085 --> 00:15:31,591
but you don't need to worry
about losing yourself with him,

326
00:15:31,616 --> 00:15:33,568
because he'll never let that happen.

327
00:15:33,593 --> 00:15:35,021
How do you know?

328
00:15:35,886 --> 00:15:37,122
(REBECCA EXHALES)

329
00:15:38,054 --> 00:15:39,888
When Randall was 11,

330
00:15:40,598 --> 00:15:42,615
we stayed at the cabin for the summer.

331
00:15:42,622 --> 00:15:44,850
And I remember sitting
out on the steps with him,

332
00:15:44,875 --> 00:15:45,958
looking up at the stars.

333
00:15:46,059 --> 00:15:48,248
I was trying to find the Big Dipper.

334
00:15:48,356 --> 00:15:50,998
And he started crying.

335
00:15:52,248 --> 00:15:53,381
Hyperventilating.

336
00:15:53,406 --> 00:15:55,248
Having an anxiety attack.

337
00:15:56,842 --> 00:16:00,417
And after he calmed down,
he told me why he was upset.

338
00:16:00,442 --> 00:16:03,678
You know, he was looking up
at this big, open sky,

339
00:16:04,135 --> 00:16:07,204
and he felt really small.

340
00:16:07,858 --> 00:16:09,349
He was scared

341
00:16:09,606 --> 00:16:12,538
because he didn't know
where he fit in the universe.

342
00:16:16,163 --> 00:16:19,101
Well, seven years ago,
after he met you, he called me.

343
00:16:21,080 --> 00:16:23,335
Told me he no longer had that fear.

344
00:16:29,539 --> 00:16:31,804
Hey. Come on, Randall.

345
00:16:32,709 --> 00:16:33,968
We're going somewhere.

346
00:16:34,219 --> 00:16:36,351
- What about my mom?
- Forget about your mom.

347
00:16:36,491 --> 00:16:38,765
She told me to say that.
Her words, not mine.

348
00:16:39,598 --> 00:16:40,835
(RANDALL SIGHS)

349
00:16:49,512 --> 00:16:51,062
Are you gonna tell me
what we're doing here?

350
00:16:51,087 --> 00:16:52,133
Not yet.

351
00:16:54,930 --> 00:16:56,023
- Hi.
- Hey.

352
00:16:56,048 --> 00:16:59,289
Can I get a number-two nachos
with extra cheese?

353
00:16:59,314 --> 00:17:00,812
You can throw some jalapeños on there.

354
00:17:00,837 --> 00:17:02,172
And a ginger beer.

355
00:17:02,197 --> 00:17:04,064
- Ice-cold if you have it.
- Coming right up.

356
00:17:04,570 --> 00:17:06,039
- Beth.
- Not yet.

357
00:17:14,300 --> 00:17:15,782
Ow. Hey.

358
00:17:23,403 --> 00:17:24,649
Okay.

359
00:17:25,086 --> 00:17:26,258
I'm ready.

360
00:17:26,821 --> 00:17:28,008
Ask me.

361
00:17:34,351 --> 00:17:35,994
- Right now?
- Yeah.

362
00:17:37,447 --> 00:17:38,861
This is my favorite meal.

363
00:17:39,335 --> 00:17:40,861
You're my favorite person.

364
00:17:41,122 --> 00:17:42,494
This is how I want it.

365
00:17:43,760 --> 00:17:45,369
I know you don't have the ring.
It's fine.

366
00:17:45,394 --> 00:17:46,674
It doesn't have... Oh, my God.

367
00:17:46,902 --> 00:17:49,494
- Really?
- Our front door barely locks.

368
00:17:49,519 --> 00:17:51,025
You think I leave this in the apartment?

369
00:17:52,466 --> 00:17:54,158
All right, look, before you do this,

370
00:17:55,647 --> 00:17:57,502
we're not gonna lose ourselves
in each other.

371
00:17:58,298 --> 00:17:59,783
We're gonna be full people.

372
00:18:01,086 --> 00:18:02,213
Equals.

373
00:18:03,465 --> 00:18:04,689
We're a team.

374
00:18:12,209 --> 00:18:13,377
All right, go ahead.

375
00:18:13,402 --> 00:18:14,448
(BETH CHUCKLES)

376
00:18:14,920 --> 00:18:16,573
(BETH SNIFFLES, SIGHS)

377
00:18:16,945 --> 00:18:18,541
("THOUSAND" BY ROSIE CARNEY PLAYING)

378
00:18:23,892 --> 00:18:24,940
(BETH CRYING)

379
00:18:25,175 --> 00:18:26,416
How are we crying already?

380
00:18:26,441 --> 00:18:27,791
We've done this a million times.

381
00:18:32,366 --> 00:18:35,307
♪ <i>She sings sweet things...</i> ♪

382
00:18:35,405 --> 00:18:36,604
Beth Clarke...

383
00:18:39,206 --> 00:18:40,753
you are the love of my life.

384
00:18:40,778 --> 00:18:43,206
♪ <i>After the laughter...</i> ♪

385
00:18:43,231 --> 00:18:44,894
You are my reason.

386
00:18:45,819 --> 00:18:47,269
You are my joy.

387
00:18:48,426 --> 00:18:49,831
You are my everything.

388
00:18:51,007 --> 00:18:52,269
♪ <i>Dust grows...</i> ♪

389
00:18:52,294 --> 00:18:54,230
And I don't want to do life without you,

390
00:18:54,796 --> 00:18:55,840
so...

391
00:18:57,348 --> 00:18:58,636
will you marry me?

392
00:18:59,071 --> 00:19:00,613
♪ <i>Can't grow</i> ♪

393
00:19:02,427 --> 00:19:04,246
I don't want to do life
without you, either.

394
00:19:06,130 --> 00:19:07,129
Yes.

395
00:19:07,838 --> 00:19:09,035
Yes.

396
00:19:09,695 --> 00:19:12,472
♪ <i>I know I've got more to give...</i> ♪

397
00:19:12,497 --> 00:19:13,697
(WHISPERS): Yes!

398
00:19:13,722 --> 00:19:14,926
(RANDALL LAUGHS)

399
00:19:25,972 --> 00:19:27,620
- KATE: Beth?
- BETH: Yeah.

400
00:19:28,472 --> 00:19:29,752
Holy crap.

401
00:19:30,018 --> 00:19:31,799
How can you guys afford this house?

402
00:19:31,995 --> 00:19:33,810
I got lost finding your bedroom.

403
00:19:33,835 --> 00:19:35,635
That's why we're having
the wedding in the backyard.

404
00:19:35,660 --> 00:19:38,049
- Suburbs ain't cheap.
- Okay, well,

405
00:19:38,148 --> 00:19:40,216
- are you ready to get your wedding on?
- Yeah, almost.

406
00:19:40,241 --> 00:19:41,667
What rhymes with "love"?

407
00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:44,971
Dove. Shove.

408
00:19:45,745 --> 00:19:47,290
Glove. Above.

409
00:19:47,315 --> 00:19:48,815
Above! That's it. Thank you.

410
00:19:49,069 --> 00:19:50,502
What rhymes with "forever"?

411
00:19:51,594 --> 00:19:53,735
Beth, you're getting married
in five minutes.

412
00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:56,032
- What is happening?
- I'm writing my vows.

413
00:19:57,104 --> 00:19:59,302
- Right now?
- Yeah, I wanted to do them last week,

414
00:19:59,327 --> 00:20:01,104
but then all these
last-minute things came up.

415
00:20:01,129 --> 00:20:02,727
And, you know, I mean,

416
00:20:02,752 --> 00:20:04,292
I just need a few more minutes, Kate.

417
00:20:04,317 --> 00:20:07,565
- Can you stall them, please?
- Okay. Um, yes.

418
00:20:07,761 --> 00:20:09,062
But hurry.

419
00:20:09,209 --> 00:20:11,260
Ooh! Endeavor.

420
00:20:11,518 --> 00:20:13,135
- What?
- Rhymes with "forever."

421
00:20:13,160 --> 00:20:14,293
- Oh!
- Yeah.

422
00:20:14,318 --> 00:20:16,104
That's why I love you, sister-in-law.

423
00:20:19,433 --> 00:20:20,549
- (KNOCK ON DOOR)
- KEVIN: Hey-o.

424
00:20:20,653 --> 00:20:21,674
- Yeah. Is it time?
- (DOOR OPENS)

425
00:20:21,699 --> 00:20:23,909
Almost. Beth needs a few minutes.

426
00:20:23,934 --> 00:20:25,198
She's just going over her vows.

427
00:20:25,507 --> 00:20:27,729
She's probably getting nervous
'cause she knows mine

428
00:20:27,754 --> 00:20:29,057
- are gonna be epic.
- Nice.

429
00:20:29,082 --> 00:20:31,307
Been perfecting these bad boys all week.

430
00:20:31,786 --> 00:20:33,612
- Wow.
- RANDALL: Yeah, yeah.

431
00:20:34,699 --> 00:20:36,088
(CHUCKLES): That's a lot... that's...

432
00:20:36,774 --> 00:20:38,065
that's a lot of w...

433
00:20:38,090 --> 00:20:39,237
How-how-how long is this?

434
00:20:39,262 --> 00:20:40,596
I don't know. Like, five, six minutes?

435
00:20:40,621 --> 00:20:42,042
Okay. Well, in acting, you know,

436
00:20:42,067 --> 00:20:45,165
we typically say a script is,
like, uh, like, a minute a page.

437
00:20:45,190 --> 00:20:47,825
Okay? But this is, uh,
12-point, single-spaced.

438
00:20:47,850 --> 00:20:49,354
(LAUGHING): This right here, you...

439
00:20:49,546 --> 00:20:51,380
She's gonna die of old age
before you finish it

440
00:20:51,405 --> 00:20:52,463
- if you read that to her.
- Okay.

441
00:20:52,488 --> 00:20:53,526
I guess they could use some cuts.

442
00:20:53,551 --> 00:20:55,159
All right, no problem. Let's just, uh...

443
00:20:55,330 --> 00:20:56,705
We'll start from the beginning, okay,

444
00:20:56,730 --> 00:20:58,397
- and we'll-we'll see what we can trim.
- Okay.

445
00:20:58,422 --> 00:20:59,963
- Yeah. We're fine.
- All right. (SIGHS)

446
00:21:01,059 --> 00:21:03,327
"Greek philosopher Plato
defined marriage

447
00:21:03,352 --> 00:21:05,237
as a conceptual agreement between two.

448
00:21:05,527 --> 00:21:07,237
A prominent institution regulating..."

449
00:21:07,262 --> 00:21:08,401
Don't care. Cut it.

450
00:21:09,234 --> 00:21:10,338
- Okay.
- Yeah, yeah.

451
00:21:10,363 --> 00:21:12,231
- Um, how about this? Um...
- Let's keep going.

452
00:21:12,650 --> 00:21:16,151
"A deconstruction of Prince's
1991 album <i>Diamonds and Pearls</i>

453
00:21:16,176 --> 00:21:18,206
reveals that this will be the day

454
00:21:18,231 --> 00:21:19,401
- that you..."
- Oh, cut that. Cut that.

455
00:21:19,514 --> 00:21:21,363
Listen, just, here's the thing, man.

456
00:21:21,388 --> 00:21:23,289
Just go to the time where
you start talking about Beth.

457
00:21:23,314 --> 00:21:24,542
- Okay.
- Start from there.

458
00:21:25,521 --> 00:21:26,612
RANDALL: Um...

459
00:21:28,484 --> 00:21:29,940
- Okay.
- Okay.

460
00:21:32,806 --> 00:21:33,810
Okay.

461
00:21:34,028 --> 00:21:35,213
Okay, Kev, I...

462
00:21:35,964 --> 00:21:37,417
I don't think I wrote vows.

463
00:21:38,204 --> 00:21:40,672
I think I wrote a deeply boring
dissertation on marriage.

464
00:21:41,007 --> 00:21:42,807
Will you... will you
go tell Beth I need more time?

465
00:21:44,027 --> 00:21:46,034
Okay. Okay.

466
00:21:49,789 --> 00:21:52,260
Okay. Bride is ready.

467
00:21:52,285 --> 00:21:54,409
BAD NEWS: the groom is not.
He's rewriting his vows.

468
00:21:55,097 --> 00:21:56,197
- What?
- Yeah.

469
00:21:56,222 --> 00:21:57,424
He's rewriting his vows?

470
00:21:57,449 --> 00:21:58,690
Wow. So pretty.

471
00:21:58,715 --> 00:21:59,971
Are you freaking kidding me?

472
00:22:01,087 --> 00:22:03,932
Beth, I don't think
we need to overreact.

473
00:22:03,957 --> 00:22:05,174
Randall Pearson.

474
00:22:05,766 --> 00:22:07,588
Close your eyes, 'cause I'm coming in.

475
00:22:12,180 --> 00:22:13,463
- Kev?
- (CHUCKLING)

476
00:22:13,808 --> 00:22:15,448
You got something, like, right here.

477
00:22:15,583 --> 00:22:17,604
- Sort of...
- Oh, you're very funny.

478
00:22:17,881 --> 00:22:20,823
What are you doing in here?
It's bad luck to see each other

479
00:22:20,848 --> 00:22:22,760
- before the wedding.
- Well, that's why I'm not looking.

480
00:22:22,863 --> 00:22:24,823
How the hell are you
still writing your vows?

481
00:22:24,848 --> 00:22:27,479
No, I'm not writing them.
I'm-I'm revising them.

482
00:22:27,504 --> 00:22:28,930
Okay? And you're one to talk.

483
00:22:28,955 --> 00:22:30,518
Kevin said you
were still working on yours.

484
00:22:30,543 --> 00:22:32,417
Well, the reason mine
aren't written is because

485
00:22:32,418 --> 00:22:34,870
I've been working on getting
this wedding ready all week.

486
00:22:35,294 --> 00:22:37,893
Which I did on my own, mind you,
because you were too busy

487
00:22:37,918 --> 00:22:39,784
writing the wedding vows of the century.

488
00:22:39,933 --> 00:22:42,159
I was just trying to make them perfect.

489
00:22:44,186 --> 00:22:46,720
Wait. You really feel
like you planned this wedding

490
00:22:46,745 --> 00:22:48,018
all by yourself?

491
00:22:52,368 --> 00:22:54,573
No, I'm just stressed.

492
00:22:57,792 --> 00:22:59,049
Um...

493
00:23:00,493 --> 00:23:02,713
what do you want to do about the vows?

494
00:23:04,765 --> 00:23:06,199
Let's just write them together.

495
00:23:06,683 --> 00:23:08,346
You know? Right now.

496
00:23:08,475 --> 00:23:10,151
You want to co-write the wedding vows?

497
00:23:10,176 --> 00:23:12,096
Yeah. Randall, we're better together.

498
00:23:12,121 --> 00:23:14,127
That's why we're doing this whole thing.

499
00:23:14,621 --> 00:23:18,362
Come on. Right now, let's just take
turns and speak from the heart.

500
00:23:19,700 --> 00:23:20,885
Okay? Come here.

501
00:23:21,452 --> 00:23:22,542
(RANDALL STAMMERS, SIGHS)

502
00:23:22,870 --> 00:23:25,171
But we shouldn't look at each other.

503
00:23:25,196 --> 00:23:26,323
Just...

504
00:23:26,472 --> 00:23:27,549
Okay.

505
00:23:28,917 --> 00:23:29,956
What?

506
00:23:31,932 --> 00:23:33,167
(EXHALES)

507
00:23:37,921 --> 00:23:39,065
Beth...

508
00:23:40,440 --> 00:23:42,917
I'm sorry I spent too much time
working on my vows.

509
00:23:43,919 --> 00:23:46,995
As you well know,
sometimes I overthink things.

510
00:23:47,020 --> 00:23:48,268
Overthink everything.

511
00:23:48,451 --> 00:23:49,596
All right, you're right.

512
00:23:49,621 --> 00:23:52,143
As you know, sometimes
I overthink everything.

513
00:23:54,732 --> 00:23:55,956
But not with you.

514
00:23:55,981 --> 00:23:56,981
♪

515
00:23:57,022 --> 00:24:00,088
Every part of me belongs to you.

516
00:24:00,246 --> 00:24:02,221
- What about Janet?
- Right again.

517
00:24:02,246 --> 00:24:03,679
Except for that very small part of me

518
00:24:03,704 --> 00:24:05,752
that I promised to Janet Jackson
when I was 16.

519
00:24:08,545 --> 00:24:11,518
Your heart is unlike
anything I've ever known.

520
00:24:12,317 --> 00:24:14,206
You're my steady place, Beth.

521
00:24:15,585 --> 00:24:18,729
I'm the best version of me
when I'm with you.

522
00:24:19,089 --> 00:24:21,854
And that's not just because
you stepped my fashion game up.

523
00:24:21,879 --> 00:24:23,534
Which I did, for the record.

524
00:24:23,559 --> 00:24:25,831
Well, let the record reflect
your contribution.

525
00:24:28,470 --> 00:24:29,635
Beth...

526
00:24:30,657 --> 00:24:32,846
I want to be the man that you deserve.

527
00:24:34,808 --> 00:24:36,026
And...

528
00:24:36,599 --> 00:24:39,252
I promise to spend the rest
of my life earning your love,

529
00:24:39,277 --> 00:24:41,182
because you are the only thing...

530
00:24:42,889 --> 00:24:46,002
...the only thing
I'm ever going to need.

531
00:24:46,918 --> 00:24:48,143
♪

532
00:24:52,790 --> 00:24:54,533
Randall, I wasn't expecting you.

533
00:24:57,162 --> 00:24:59,432
I didn't think that
we would end up together.

534
00:25:01,031 --> 00:25:02,565
<i>The single most...</i>

535
00:25:02,745 --> 00:25:05,471
extraordinary thing
I've ever done with my life

536
00:25:05,936 --> 00:25:07,440
is falling in love with you.

537
00:25:09,589 --> 00:25:11,768
I've never been seen so completely...

538
00:25:13,649 --> 00:25:16,549
loved so passionately...

539
00:25:17,650 --> 00:25:19,213
protected so fiercely.

540
00:25:19,238 --> 00:25:20,526
Is that off the dome?

541
00:25:20,714 --> 00:25:21,714
'Cause damn, baby,

542
00:25:21,739 --> 00:25:22,979
- that was nice.
- Right?

543
00:25:23,004 --> 00:25:24,049
Yeah, yeah.

544
00:25:25,584 --> 00:25:27,401
Honestly, Randall,
when I look in your eyes,

545
00:25:27,426 --> 00:25:28,752
I see my home.

546
00:25:30,443 --> 00:25:31,745
I see eternity.

547
00:25:34,068 --> 00:25:36,104
And no matter what may come our way...

548
00:25:37,114 --> 00:25:39,713
I promise that I'll always choose you.

549
00:25:41,556 --> 00:25:42,752
I love you.

550
00:25:43,458 --> 00:25:44,706
I love you, too.

551
00:25:47,819 --> 00:25:49,526
- Let's go get married.
- (SNIFFLES)

552
00:25:52,467 --> 00:25:55,591
- Okay.
- ♪ <i>We were living in the shadows</i> ♪

553
00:25:55,616 --> 00:25:57,463
♪ <i>On the wall</i> ♪

554
00:26:00,149 --> 00:26:03,604
♪ <i>They were left there by the sun</i> ♪

555
00:26:07,663 --> 00:26:08,963
♪ <i>We were living</i> ♪

556
00:26:08,988 --> 00:26:11,790
♪ <i>In the shadows on the wall</i> ♪

557
00:26:13,431 --> 00:26:14,643
(CHEERING)

558
00:26:15,014 --> 00:26:16,721
♪ <i>They were left there</i> ♪

559
00:26:16,746 --> 00:26:18,831
♪ <i>By the sun</i> ♪

560
00:26:21,052 --> 00:26:22,268
♪ <i>We were looking</i> ♪

561
00:26:22,293 --> 00:26:25,799
♪ <i>At the past for oh, so long...</i> ♪

562
00:26:34,233 --> 00:26:35,428
- (SIGHS) Sorry, baby.
- (TESS FUSSING)

563
00:26:35,754 --> 00:26:39,163
It's 3:00 a.m., and Daddy
does not know where he is.

564
00:26:40,155 --> 00:26:42,030
- Oh, you're using the wrong wipes.
- Oh, geez.

565
00:26:42,764 --> 00:26:45,950
- You're using the wrong wipes.
- Then why are they here?

566
00:26:45,975 --> 00:26:48,404
- BETH: She likes the smell.
- What, you buy the wrong wipes

567
00:26:48,429 --> 00:26:49,729
just so that she can smell them?

568
00:26:49,754 --> 00:26:52,156
Am I tired, or does that
make no sense at all?

569
00:26:52,181 --> 00:26:54,444
I don't know, honestly.
Move. I'll do it.

570
00:26:54,469 --> 00:26:56,636
Uh-uh. You asked me to do it.

571
00:26:56,818 --> 00:26:58,486
I have to be at work in four hours,

572
00:26:58,511 --> 00:27:00,608
and you woke me up anyway,
so just let me do it.

573
00:27:00,633 --> 00:27:02,795
- Did you put the butt paste first?
- Can you back up, please?

574
00:27:02,999 --> 00:27:05,256
I'm perfectly capable
of changing my daughter's diaper

575
00:27:05,281 --> 00:27:06,569
without any supervision.

576
00:27:06,594 --> 00:27:08,155
Just let me do it
so I can go back to bed.

577
00:27:08,180 --> 00:27:10,811
- I'm freaking exhausted.
- I work 72 hours a week.

578
00:27:10,836 --> 00:27:12,335
- You don't think I'm exhausted?
- Oh, pfft.

579
00:27:12,360 --> 00:27:13,839
- Oh, pfft.
- You pfft!

580
00:27:13,864 --> 00:27:15,443
- Pfft you!
- You pfft, pfft!

581
00:27:15,468 --> 00:27:16,772
- Pfft!
- (BETH WHIMPERS)

582
00:27:19,928 --> 00:27:21,224
BETH: I don't even

583
00:27:21,249 --> 00:27:23,069
know what the hell we're fighting about.

584
00:27:23,694 --> 00:27:25,100
It's baby wipes, I think.

585
00:27:25,125 --> 00:27:26,366
Oh, I feel drunk.

586
00:27:26,391 --> 00:27:27,920
You better not be drunk.

587
00:27:30,850 --> 00:27:32,803
- You hungry?
- I could eat.

588
00:27:33,374 --> 00:27:35,897
- Nachos?
- Oh, God, that sounds good.

589
00:27:36,310 --> 00:27:39,078
Extra cheesy,
extra greasy nachos for the lady

590
00:27:39,103 --> 00:27:40,820
- coming right up.
- Oh, yes.

591
00:27:42,920 --> 00:27:44,428
Make sure you wash your hands first.

592
00:27:44,453 --> 00:27:45,717
You leave me alone.

593
00:27:47,888 --> 00:27:50,155
BETH: Yeah, she's strapped
into her stroller,

594
00:27:50,280 --> 00:27:53,452
and I'm not even near the edge
of the pond or anything,

595
00:27:53,477 --> 00:27:56,112
but I just keep seeing her falling in.

596
00:27:56,166 --> 00:27:58,631
- Jesus, Beth.
- I know, right?

597
00:27:59,842 --> 00:28:02,374
Okay, let's play a game.

598
00:28:03,196 --> 00:28:04,397
Barring death,

599
00:28:05,124 --> 00:28:06,991
what's the worst-case scenario
for our baby?

600
00:28:07,604 --> 00:28:08,803
Anything goes?

601
00:28:09,503 --> 00:28:10,686
Lay it on me, Mama.

602
00:28:11,992 --> 00:28:13,319
That she can't dance.

603
00:28:14,460 --> 00:28:15,915
That she don't have no rhythm.

604
00:28:16,991 --> 00:28:18,083
Don't look at me like that.

605
00:28:18,108 --> 00:28:19,842
- That's a real fear.
- (LAUGHS): Okay.

606
00:28:20,688 --> 00:28:23,006
- Your turn.
- Mm...

607
00:28:24,155 --> 00:28:26,210
That she's covered in tattoos.

608
00:28:26,866 --> 00:28:28,014
You know, call me old-fashioned,

609
00:28:28,039 --> 00:28:30,647
but I don't want T-Pain
making a song about my daughter.

610
00:28:31,374 --> 00:28:33,833
That she forgets me
when my maternity leave ends

611
00:28:33,858 --> 00:28:35,225
and I go back to work.

612
00:28:35,842 --> 00:28:37,616
That is worst-case for me.

613
00:28:39,280 --> 00:28:42,175
That these past three months
with her just weren't enough.

614
00:28:42,991 --> 00:28:45,311
I thought you were looking
forward to going back to work.

615
00:28:45,412 --> 00:28:48,233
I was. I still am.

616
00:28:49,997 --> 00:28:51,249
Hey.

617
00:28:52,569 --> 00:28:54,335
Beth, we'll figure out
a way to make it work.

618
00:28:55,061 --> 00:28:57,108
Yeah, sounds good, but, you know,

619
00:28:57,655 --> 00:29:00,967
"making it work" usually means
I adjust, I make it work.

620
00:29:01,066 --> 00:29:03,092
- What does that mean?
- (CHUCKLES) Nothing.

621
00:29:03,195 --> 00:29:04,600
No! You can't "nothing" that.

622
00:29:05,225 --> 00:29:06,966
- Say it.
- Oh, come on, Randall,

623
00:29:06,991 --> 00:29:09,061
let's be real...
you're not gonna quit your job,

624
00:29:09,332 --> 00:29:12,967
so if somebody has to
make it work, it's gonna be me.

625
00:29:12,992 --> 00:29:15,004
I have to lose something.

626
00:29:15,029 --> 00:29:16,280
That's not true.

627
00:29:24,767 --> 00:29:28,170
You know what?
I have this theory. Hear me out.

628
00:29:28,195 --> 00:29:29,762
- Okay.
- So,

629
00:29:30,057 --> 00:29:33,803
there are three different kinds
of nachos, right?

630
00:29:33,828 --> 00:29:35,729
- Uh-huh.
- There are the crumbs,

631
00:29:36,147 --> 00:29:38,702
the little scraps with
all the salt at the bottom.

632
00:29:38,891 --> 00:29:42,599
They stick to your fingers. They
mess up your clothes. They're nasty.

633
00:29:42,624 --> 00:29:44,401
- Nobody likes them, right?
- Okay.

634
00:29:44,426 --> 00:29:47,561
Then there are the chipped nachos, okay?

635
00:29:48,093 --> 00:29:49,761
There's no smooth edges.

636
00:29:50,295 --> 00:29:51,616
Sometimes they catch cheese.

637
00:29:51,641 --> 00:29:53,577
Sometimes they're just
a plain chip. They're fine.

638
00:29:54,202 --> 00:29:56,139
And then there's the cream of the crop.

639
00:29:56,960 --> 00:29:59,967
The whole nacho with lots of cheese

640
00:29:59,992 --> 00:30:02,014
and the perfect amount of toppings.

641
00:30:02,056 --> 00:30:05,358
Unbroken, fully coated

642
00:30:05,383 --> 00:30:07,483
- triangles of goodness.
- (LAUGHS): Wait.

643
00:30:07,819 --> 00:30:09,163
It's 4:00 in the morning,

644
00:30:09,188 --> 00:30:10,822
and you're giving me
a dissertation on nachos?

645
00:30:10,847 --> 00:30:12,241
No, you know I be philosophizing.

646
00:30:12,266 --> 00:30:13,608
- (CHUCKLES): Yeah, well...
- Now,

647
00:30:14,610 --> 00:30:17,881
I was thinking, you know
what's great about us, Randall,

648
00:30:17,906 --> 00:30:21,530
is that when I need nachos,
you make them for me.

649
00:30:21,768 --> 00:30:23,368
And I love that.

650
00:30:23,546 --> 00:30:28,335
But you're the kind of person
who goes for the whole chip

651
00:30:28,865 --> 00:30:30,561
with lots of cheese.

652
00:30:31,116 --> 00:30:32,256
You don't do it on purpose.

653
00:30:32,281 --> 00:30:35,077
You're just a whole chip with
a lot of cheese kind of person.

654
00:30:35,762 --> 00:30:39,663
And so am I, yet...

655
00:30:42,475 --> 00:30:45,069
Wait, no. I don't leave you
with the crumbs.

656
00:30:45,094 --> 00:30:46,100
(CHUCKLES)

657
00:30:46,125 --> 00:30:47,710
What, do you feel like I
leave you with the crumbs?

658
00:30:47,735 --> 00:30:49,035
No, don't spiral.
I don't... I don't even know

659
00:30:49,060 --> 00:30:50,636
what I'm saying, okay? I'm exhausted.

660
00:30:50,738 --> 00:30:53,006
Yeah, well, I'll never eat
nachos again, so there you go.

661
00:30:53,107 --> 00:30:54,467
No. Oh, come on. All right, come on.

662
00:30:54,492 --> 00:30:56,116
Let's just go to bed, all right?

663
00:30:56,355 --> 00:30:58,631
Before our little screamer
wakes us up again.

664
00:30:59,899 --> 00:31:02,139
We'll just clean that up in the morning.

665
00:31:12,624 --> 00:31:14,950
So I told this cat,
"I'm never playing dominoes

666
00:31:14,975 --> 00:31:16,374
- in this joint again."
- (LAUGHTER)

667
00:31:18,280 --> 00:31:20,546
- Oh, there she is.
- Hey, guys.

668
00:31:20,571 --> 00:31:21,640
Hey, you hungry?

669
00:31:21,665 --> 00:31:23,843
- Kev made pancakes.
- I see that.

670
00:31:23,944 --> 00:31:25,694
KEVIN: Yeah, Beth, I was
talking to Randall earlier,

671
00:31:25,719 --> 00:31:28,396
and the Wi-Fi in the
basement, it's subpar.

672
00:31:28,437 --> 00:31:29,999
- It's very spotty.
- Uh, 'cause it's a basement.

673
00:31:30,024 --> 00:31:32,177
Well, why am I in the basement?
'Cause, you know,

674
00:31:32,202 --> 00:31:33,968
William over here, he's
upstairs, he's in Annie's room.

675
00:31:33,993 --> 00:31:36,483
'Cause that's how we do it
over here at Hotel Pearson.

676
00:31:36,508 --> 00:31:38,491
You know? Estranged fathers go upstairs,

677
00:31:38,536 --> 00:31:40,530
television star brothers go downstairs.

678
00:31:40,620 --> 00:31:43,421
- Mm. All right.
- All right, well, I'm headed out.

679
00:31:43,499 --> 00:31:45,952
- Where to?
- I'm going to this Urban Development

680
00:31:45,977 --> 00:31:47,818
Leadership Conference
in Hershey, Pennsylvania.

681
00:31:47,843 --> 00:31:48,991
- WILLIAM: Sounds cool.
- Just for a night.

682
00:31:49,016 --> 00:31:50,163
- KEVIN: Great.
- So, uh,

683
00:31:50,188 --> 00:31:52,456
Cindy's parents can't drop off Annie,

684
00:31:52,481 --> 00:31:53,952
so can you pick her up
from her sleepover?

685
00:31:53,977 --> 00:31:55,874
Yes, ma'am.
Will Hill and I are on the job.

686
00:31:56,158 --> 00:31:57,850
- All right, love you.
- Love you, too.

687
00:31:58,116 --> 00:31:59,796
- Mm. Bye.
- Bye, guys.

688
00:32:00,091 --> 00:32:01,155
KEVIN: You know what we should do?

689
00:32:01,180 --> 00:32:03,835
- RANDALL: What do you want to do?
- Right now? Dominoes, for money.

690
00:32:03,860 --> 00:32:05,583
Oh, no, no. I'm not... I'm not
gonna take your guys' money.

691
00:32:05,608 --> 00:32:06,718
(OVERLAPPING ARGUING)

692
00:32:06,795 --> 00:32:08,436
KEVIN: You're scared.
You look scared to me.

693
00:32:08,461 --> 00:32:09,788
- WILLIAM: Oh, boy.
- I'll take your money.

694
00:32:09,813 --> 00:32:10,827
RANDALL: Go get him.

695
00:32:12,078 --> 00:32:14,022
How far away does Annie's friend live?

696
00:32:14,126 --> 00:32:15,468
- We're almost there.
- Hmm.

697
00:32:15,493 --> 00:32:16,538
(PHONE CHIMES)

698
00:32:17,777 --> 00:32:19,069
RANDALL: Oh, you know how to text?

699
00:32:20,825 --> 00:32:22,968
- I'm dying. I'm not a hundred.
- (CHUCKLES)

700
00:32:23,975 --> 00:32:25,304
Jesse's trying to get me to go

701
00:32:25,329 --> 00:32:27,171
to this Charles Lloyd concert tonight,

702
00:32:27,196 --> 00:32:28,996
but the show doesn't start till 9:00.

703
00:32:29,655 --> 00:32:31,350
Well, I know we run
a tight ship, William,

704
00:32:31,375 --> 00:32:33,085
but it's okay for you
to stay out past curfew.

705
00:32:33,110 --> 00:32:35,733
Well, thank you, but these things
end late, and I don't want

706
00:32:35,758 --> 00:32:37,694
to have to spend the night at his place.

707
00:32:39,084 --> 00:32:41,077
The man's apartment is freezing.

708
00:32:41,815 --> 00:32:43,100
Why don't you just ask him,

709
00:32:43,125 --> 00:32:45,179
"Hey, Jesse, mind if we
turn on the heat?"

710
00:32:45,204 --> 00:32:48,265
Nah, I don't want him to have to
change his routine on account of me.

711
00:32:48,290 --> 00:32:51,093
It's easier if I just make
an excuse not to stay over.

712
00:32:51,226 --> 00:32:53,460
No, man, it's easier to talk to him.

713
00:32:53,623 --> 00:32:56,093
You know, me and Beth,
we don't sit on stuff.

714
00:32:56,118 --> 00:32:57,350
We talk to each other.

715
00:32:57,522 --> 00:32:59,690
Nothing beats honest,
open communication.

716
00:33:00,088 --> 00:33:02,056
Okay, Uncle Phil. I'll think on it.

717
00:33:02,266 --> 00:33:04,163
Oh, we making <i>Fresh Prince</i>
<i>references now, huh?</i>

718
00:33:04,188 --> 00:33:06,522
- How old do you actually think I am?
- (BOTH LAUGH)

719
00:33:07,442 --> 00:33:08,561
Hey, pull over.

720
00:33:08,966 --> 00:33:11,634
I want to get some more syrup
for them leftover pancakes.

721
00:33:11,659 --> 00:33:12,780
Might have it for dinner.

722
00:33:12,805 --> 00:33:13,936
Right on.

723
00:33:15,741 --> 00:33:17,054
Maybe down here, son.

724
00:33:17,079 --> 00:33:18,163
Yeah.

725
00:33:22,630 --> 00:33:23,749
Beth?

726
00:33:27,511 --> 00:33:28,905
Why aren't you in Hershey?

727
00:33:31,163 --> 00:33:32,350
I, uh...

728
00:33:34,225 --> 00:33:36,179
I'm gonna go find that syrup.

729
00:33:36,723 --> 00:33:39,155
Give you a chance to do some
of that great communicating

730
00:33:39,180 --> 00:33:40,491
you're so proud of.

731
00:33:43,434 --> 00:33:45,616
- What are you doing here?
- Buying syrup.

732
00:33:46,570 --> 00:33:47,741
What are you doing here?

733
00:33:48,779 --> 00:33:50,080
Don't jump to conclusions.

734
00:33:50,105 --> 00:33:51,546
- It's not what you think.
- Swedish Fish.

735
00:33:51,571 --> 00:33:53,749
What, you stopping at the movies
on your way to Hershey?

736
00:33:54,160 --> 00:33:56,030
That doesn't explain
that bottle of wine.

737
00:33:56,055 --> 00:33:58,749
- Randall, I...
- Or did you make up a conference

738
00:33:58,774 --> 00:34:00,827
so you could secretly
check into a hotel for the night

739
00:34:00,852 --> 00:34:02,366
to watch movies
and drink that bottle of wine

740
00:34:02,391 --> 00:34:04,874
- and eat Swedish Fish?
- Damn, that's impressive.

741
00:34:04,899 --> 00:34:06,155
What the hell, Beth?

742
00:34:06,180 --> 00:34:09,140
I just needed 24 hours to myself.

743
00:34:10,797 --> 00:34:13,515
Away from biological fathers
and white brothers.

744
00:34:13,607 --> 00:34:15,819
And don't get me wrong, I adore them.

745
00:34:16,014 --> 00:34:17,515
I adore William.

746
00:34:17,976 --> 00:34:19,116
I tolerate Kevin.

747
00:34:19,141 --> 00:34:20,827
But it's a lot.

748
00:34:22,010 --> 00:34:23,140
So I lied.

749
00:34:23,588 --> 00:34:27,007
I just needed 24 hours.

750
00:34:27,282 --> 00:34:29,272
Not to be a wife and a mother

751
00:34:29,297 --> 00:34:31,436
and a caretaker and a housekeeper.

752
00:34:31,461 --> 00:34:33,975
I just... I just want to be a woman

753
00:34:34,000 --> 00:34:36,796
who sleeps in a big-ass
hotel bed and watches movies

754
00:34:36,821 --> 00:34:40,225
and-and reruns of <i>Living Single</i>
<i>from my iPad</i>

755
00:34:40,669 --> 00:34:42,772
in my big-ass Jacuzzi tub, and I...

756
00:34:42,797 --> 00:34:44,850
Okay, I get it.

757
00:34:45,732 --> 00:34:48,327
- There's a lot going on in our house.
- Yes.

758
00:34:48,998 --> 00:34:51,147
But if you needed space,
why not just ask for it...

759
00:34:51,172 --> 00:34:52,366
I have asked!

760
00:34:53,931 --> 00:34:55,210
I have asked.

761
00:34:55,575 --> 00:34:58,515
And the last time I asked,
it became a one-act play

762
00:34:58,540 --> 00:34:59,843
about "what's wrong"

763
00:34:59,868 --> 00:35:02,015
and-and "why do I need a day alone?"

764
00:35:02,513 --> 00:35:04,390
By the time I convinced you
it was nothing bigger,

765
00:35:04,415 --> 00:35:07,617
the day was over,
and it was... I was exhausted.

766
00:35:07,830 --> 00:35:10,382
I wouldn't have been awake to
watch a single <i>Living Single.</i>

767
00:35:14,870 --> 00:35:17,288
I-I'm sorry. I love you.

768
00:35:17,313 --> 00:35:19,772
- I feel terrible that I lied.
- I don't want you to feel

769
00:35:19,797 --> 00:35:21,069
like you have to run away from us.

770
00:35:21,094 --> 00:35:25,030
I don't. I swear. There's just
a lot of men living in my house.

771
00:35:25,291 --> 00:35:26,538
And I broke.

772
00:35:28,501 --> 00:35:29,842
(BETH CRYING)

773
00:35:36,111 --> 00:35:37,241
Okay.

774
00:35:37,657 --> 00:35:41,335
- All right, go enjoy your 24 hours.
- (LAUGHS)

775
00:35:45,910 --> 00:35:48,452
Uh, will you just answer me one thing?

776
00:35:50,244 --> 00:35:52,272
What episode of <i>Living Single</i>
<i>are you gonna start with?</i>

777
00:35:54,029 --> 00:35:56,063
The one where Max and Kyle
sleep together

778
00:35:56,088 --> 00:35:58,624
and wake up in the La-Z-Boy
all freaked out.

779
00:35:58,649 --> 00:35:59,975
- I love that episode.
- (LAUGHS)

780
00:36:00,863 --> 00:36:03,968
Hey, you remember when Obie
brought Kyle Max's suede pump,

781
00:36:03,993 --> 00:36:07,343
and Kyle was like, "And to think
I actually drank out of this."

782
00:36:07,470 --> 00:36:08,663
(BOTH LAUGHING)

783
00:36:09,597 --> 00:36:11,233
That was so nasty.

784
00:36:12,241 --> 00:36:14,163
RANDALL (LAUGHING): Oh, man.

785
00:36:14,188 --> 00:36:16,022
Well, now I don't want
to watch it without you.

786
00:36:17,147 --> 00:36:18,694
Go. What are you talking about?

787
00:36:19,314 --> 00:36:20,452
No.

788
00:36:21,415 --> 00:36:22,760
I'm coming home.

789
00:36:23,850 --> 00:36:24,861
Go get William's syrup.

790
00:36:24,913 --> 00:36:26,624
Tell him the one that he likes
is in aisle four.

791
00:36:26,649 --> 00:36:27,849
Are you sure?

792
00:36:28,010 --> 00:36:29,644
'Cause I don't mind you having your day.

793
00:36:29,669 --> 00:36:30,796
I'm sure.

794
00:36:32,618 --> 00:36:34,257
And Kevin's out of toilet paper.

795
00:36:34,282 --> 00:36:36,077
He likes the lavender-scented one.

796
00:36:36,102 --> 00:36:37,343
Pick up the lavender-scented one.

797
00:36:37,411 --> 00:36:38,507
I'm on it.

798
00:36:48,663 --> 00:36:51,272
I am tired of having this fight.

799
00:36:51,585 --> 00:36:55,116
We have been having the same
fight ever since we met.

800
00:36:55,241 --> 00:36:56,819
I don't want to be swallowed up by you,

801
00:36:56,844 --> 00:36:59,350
and then you sweet-talk me and
do whatever the hell you want.

802
00:37:00,186 --> 00:37:02,247
You have turned me into your mother.

803
00:37:02,272 --> 00:37:03,389
Beth, don't bring my mother into this.

804
00:37:03,414 --> 00:37:04,670
Well, she's already in it.

805
00:37:05,335 --> 00:37:07,592
You don't even realize it,
but they're both in it.

806
00:37:10,152 --> 00:37:11,748
Admit that you think

807
00:37:11,773 --> 00:37:13,983
that your job
is more important than mine.

808
00:37:14,443 --> 00:37:16,022
- That's absurd.
- Admit it.

809
00:37:16,531 --> 00:37:19,170
Admit to me that you hated the fact

810
00:37:19,201 --> 00:37:21,451
that I had something happening
for myself.

811
00:37:21,476 --> 00:37:23,053
- JACK: I hated that you lied
- REBECCA: No.

812
00:37:23,078 --> 00:37:24,530
about working with your ex-boyfriend.

813
00:37:24,555 --> 00:37:25,722
<i>REBECCA: No, that's total BS, Jack.</i>

814
00:37:25,747 --> 00:37:27,373
Come on, Randall, admit it.

815
00:37:27,398 --> 00:37:28,451
No.

816
00:37:28,554 --> 00:37:30,417
I will not be bullied into
saying something

817
00:37:30,442 --> 00:37:32,131
even more awful to you.

818
00:37:32,787 --> 00:37:35,873
I will not speak that way
to you. I won't do it.

819
00:37:35,935 --> 00:37:37,084
No. You didn't want me to have a career.

820
00:37:37,109 --> 00:37:39,005
- Career? You are a 40-year-old woman
- Yes career.

821
00:37:39,030 --> 00:37:42,280
singing covers in pubs.
That is not a career, Rebecca.

822
00:37:42,305 --> 00:37:43,717
<i>That is ridiculous.</i>

823
00:37:44,376 --> 00:37:46,194
We made a promise to one another

824
00:37:47,039 --> 00:37:49,991
that we would never get lost
in each other,

825
00:37:50,016 --> 00:37:51,550
and I broke that promise.

826
00:37:53,678 --> 00:37:54,967
And you let me.

827
00:37:55,369 --> 00:38:00,833
You have let me bend to your
every need time and time again.

828
00:38:00,858 --> 00:38:03,544
Oh, we have kids,
I have to step back from my job.

829
00:38:03,569 --> 00:38:06,022
You quit your job, I work overtime.

830
00:38:06,047 --> 00:38:08,967
You have a dream of buying
your father's building,

831
00:38:08,992 --> 00:38:10,459
it becomes my dream, too.

832
00:38:10,484 --> 00:38:13,045
You run for city councilman,
I stand by your side.

833
00:38:13,070 --> 00:38:15,530
You win city councilman, now what?

834
00:38:15,854 --> 00:38:17,821
I'm supposed to give up what I love

835
00:38:18,078 --> 00:38:19,733
to become a politician's wife?

836
00:38:19,779 --> 00:38:22,514
How many dinners am I supposed
to go to, Randall? And how long?

837
00:38:23,467 --> 00:38:25,723
And what if city council isn't enough?

838
00:38:25,748 --> 00:38:27,272
- What then?
- That's not what I want.

839
00:38:27,297 --> 00:38:29,932
No, I finally have something;
I have something

840
00:38:29,957 --> 00:38:33,608
that I have been looking for
longer than I knew,

841
00:38:33,709 --> 00:38:36,459
and I am not going to give that up.

842
00:38:37,834 --> 00:38:39,483
I am not going to bend.

843
00:38:42,997 --> 00:38:44,491
And that's the problem.

844
00:38:45,766 --> 00:38:49,389
Our lives don't work
unless I'm doing the bending.

845
00:38:50,548 --> 00:38:51,569
It doesn't.

846
00:38:53,115 --> 00:38:54,522
And we both know it.

847
00:39:12,131 --> 00:39:13,631
No, please. I... (SIGHS)

848
00:39:13,762 --> 00:39:15,674
I can see your mind working

849
00:39:15,699 --> 00:39:18,473
and-and you looking
for the perfect words

850
00:39:18,498 --> 00:39:20,152
to make this better,
and I don't want that.

851
00:39:20,177 --> 00:39:21,295
I don't want it.

852
00:39:21,975 --> 00:39:23,616
Because you're too good at it.

853
00:39:24,217 --> 00:39:26,459
You're unbelievable at it, in fact.

854
00:39:26,484 --> 00:39:28,139
And you say the right speech

855
00:39:28,164 --> 00:39:30,264
and have the whole world eating
out of your palm.

856
00:39:30,360 --> 00:39:31,701
Me, especially.

857
00:39:39,767 --> 00:39:40,849
(BETH SIGHS)

858
00:39:41,226 --> 00:39:44,319
No. No, I don't accept that, Beth.

859
00:39:44,344 --> 00:39:46,888
I'm not... I'm not going along
with this revisionist history.

860
00:39:46,913 --> 00:39:48,814
Revisionist history? Okay...

861
00:39:48,839 --> 00:39:52,515
Okay, in what universe
have I been steamrolling you

862
00:39:52,540 --> 00:39:54,045
for the past 20 years?

863
00:39:54,826 --> 00:39:56,403
I mean, your whole persona

864
00:39:56,428 --> 00:39:59,389
is driven by you being
the head of this family.

865
00:39:59,414 --> 00:40:02,549
So I'm-a ask you again:
in what ridiculous universe

866
00:40:02,574 --> 00:40:05,998
are you this wallflower that's
just been steamrolled by me?

867
00:40:06,023 --> 00:40:07,756
And these are not my words, Beth.

868
00:40:07,781 --> 00:40:09,209
This is your M.O.

869
00:40:09,366 --> 00:40:11,997
So, please, please do not self-protect

870
00:40:12,022 --> 00:40:13,939
- by putting this on me.
- That is not what I'm doing.

871
00:40:13,964 --> 00:40:15,342
The hell it's not.

872
00:40:16,037 --> 00:40:17,618
I refuse to be blamed for the fact

873
00:40:17,643 --> 00:40:20,679
that you had your awakening
20 years too late.

874
00:40:20,944 --> 00:40:22,700
At any other point in our marriage,

875
00:40:22,725 --> 00:40:24,756
if you had decided
you wanted to go back to dance,

876
00:40:24,781 --> 00:40:26,771
I would have been
nothing but supportive.

877
00:40:26,796 --> 00:40:28,178
Oh, so when would I have done that, huh?

878
00:40:28,203 --> 00:40:30,069
Between which of your anxiety attacks?

879
00:40:40,514 --> 00:40:42,528
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

880
00:40:42,553 --> 00:40:44,006
I shouldn't have s... I...

881
00:40:44,478 --> 00:40:45,725
I did not mean...

882
00:40:47,551 --> 00:40:48,662
♪

883
00:40:56,937 --> 00:40:58,225
Where are you going?

884
00:41:02,545 --> 00:41:03,686
To Philly.

885
00:41:04,153 --> 00:41:06,592
'Cause I don't want to be in
this house with you right now.

886
00:41:08,713 --> 00:41:10,733
Well, it's good news for you, I guess.

887
00:41:11,635 --> 00:41:13,116
I'm all out of speeches.

888
00:42:38,450 --> 00:42:40,630
synced and corrected by susinz
*www.addic7ed.com*

