1 00:00:00,500 --> 00:00:02,000 www.tvsubtitles.net 2 00:00:14,394 --> 00:00:16,089 Four for David. 3 00:00:16,129 --> 00:00:19,724 Let me see... no, I'm not finding that. 4 00:00:19,766 --> 00:00:23,532 Try Braudy. B-R-A-U-D-Y. 5 00:00:23,570 --> 00:00:26,130 Here we go, for four. All right. 6 00:00:26,173 --> 00:00:28,403 They haven't arrived. Would you like to be seated? 7 00:00:28,442 --> 00:00:31,240 - Sure. - Right this way. 8 00:00:31,278 --> 00:00:34,736 I'm looking. They automate it right. I'll tell you that. 9 00:00:34,781 --> 00:00:37,045 - Hey. - Hey, look who's here. 10 00:00:37,084 --> 00:00:39,814 - Guys, how are you? - Good to see you. 11 00:00:39,853 --> 00:00:42,822 What are you doing here? Well, let me guess. 12 00:00:42,856 --> 00:00:44,949 We're gonna take a nap, yeah. 13 00:00:44,991 --> 00:00:48,392 We're gonna meet some friends and have dinner. 14 00:00:48,428 --> 00:00:51,420 Okay, I didn't mean to pry into your life there. 15 00:00:51,465 --> 00:00:54,127 I meant, what are you doing in general? What's going on? 16 00:00:54,167 --> 00:00:56,795 You know what? I'm investing in a restaurant. 17 00:00:56,837 --> 00:00:59,465 What are you touching? No reason to touch. 18 00:00:59,506 --> 00:01:01,371 - Did I overstep my boundary? - No touching here. 19 00:01:01,408 --> 00:01:03,876 - Do you need the money? - I think it will be fun to do, 20 00:01:03,910 --> 00:01:06,105 you know, showing people to their table. 21 00:01:06,146 --> 00:01:08,011 You'll be working there like a busboy? 22 00:01:08,048 --> 00:01:10,778 No... remember when we used to hang out in comedy clubs in New York? 23 00:01:10,817 --> 00:01:13,581 I didn't invest. I just went there and I left. 24 00:01:13,620 --> 00:01:15,747 I didn't lock up. 25 00:01:15,789 --> 00:01:18,553 - Are you gonna lock up the restaurant? - I'm not gonna lock up. 26 00:01:18,592 --> 00:01:23,325 "See you there, Rocco." I went with "Rocco." 27 00:01:23,363 --> 00:01:25,058 - Good to see you. - Nice to see you. 28 00:01:25,098 --> 00:01:27,362 'Night, Paul, see you later. 29 00:01:29,970 --> 00:01:32,962 Larry, you are so rude. 30 00:01:33,006 --> 00:01:35,133 Why? 31 00:01:35,175 --> 00:01:37,200 You didn't say one word to Mindy. 32 00:01:38,645 --> 00:01:41,136 You didn't look in her direction the whole time. 33 00:01:41,181 --> 00:01:44,617 Did you say anything to her? 34 00:01:46,019 --> 00:01:48,214 You do that all the time. 35 00:01:48,255 --> 00:01:50,348 I said hello, didn't I? 36 00:01:50,390 --> 00:01:52,153 I don't think you did, honestly. 37 00:01:52,192 --> 00:01:55,218 - I didn't say hello? - No. 38 00:01:55,262 --> 00:01:58,060 - No, I said hello. - I don't think you did. 39 00:01:58,098 --> 00:02:00,692 I think you were very caught up in Paul. 40 00:02:00,734 --> 00:02:03,601 You didn't even look over at her. 41 00:02:03,637 --> 00:02:06,037 Oh, she must think I'm such an asshole. 42 00:02:06,072 --> 00:02:07,903 Yeah. 43 00:02:07,941 --> 00:02:10,205 Did you even notice her? 44 00:02:10,243 --> 00:02:13,838 Well, I smelled her perfume. It's hard not to notice. 45 00:02:13,880 --> 00:02:15,711 Well, she owns a perfume shop. 46 00:02:15,749 --> 00:02:20,652 The whole night is just... you can't leave your house. 47 00:02:23,723 --> 00:02:26,157 Bye, bye. 48 00:02:26,193 --> 00:02:28,525 She didn't even wave goodbye or anything. 49 00:02:28,562 --> 00:02:30,723 By the way, when the check comes tonight, 50 00:02:30,764 --> 00:02:34,666 Stu can pick it up. Don't pick up the check. 51 00:02:34,701 --> 00:02:37,499 - Yeah, I paid the last two times... - You have. 52 00:02:37,537 --> 00:02:40,370 He runs to the bathroom every time the check comes. 53 00:02:40,407 --> 00:02:42,238 I've noticed the bathroom trick. 54 00:02:42,275 --> 00:02:44,470 - He's got that trick down. - He really does. 55 00:02:44,511 --> 00:02:46,536 Hi. I'm so late, late. 56 00:02:46,580 --> 00:02:48,514 No, you're not late, don't worry about it. 57 00:02:48,548 --> 00:02:50,675 Good to see you. 58 00:02:51,818 --> 00:02:53,843 We would've been here 10 minutes earlier 59 00:02:53,887 --> 00:02:56,856 if we'd valeted the car instead of trying to find a parking space. 60 00:02:56,890 --> 00:02:58,858 I'm not gonna valet the car. 61 00:02:58,892 --> 00:03:00,985 I got this new Cadillac CTS. 62 00:03:01,027 --> 00:03:03,291 Drives like a dream. I'm gonna give it to the valet? 63 00:03:03,330 --> 00:03:05,298 Yeah, it's our third child. 64 00:03:05,332 --> 00:03:07,994 Did you happen to run into the Reisers outside? 65 00:03:08,034 --> 00:03:10,832 We saw them, but no eye contact. 66 00:03:10,871 --> 00:03:13,032 No, they didn't see us. 67 00:03:13,073 --> 00:03:17,169 They're not invited to the NRDC benefit at your house? 68 00:03:17,210 --> 00:03:19,178 I don't think it would be a good idea, do you? 69 00:03:19,212 --> 00:03:21,544 It just felt like it would be hypocritical. 70 00:03:21,581 --> 00:03:25,312 It is so generous of you guys to open your house to this benefit. 71 00:03:25,352 --> 00:03:27,718 - And your hearts. - It's a big undertaking. 72 00:03:27,754 --> 00:03:29,779 It is a big undertaking. But you know what? 73 00:03:29,823 --> 00:03:33,224 I get to have Alanis Morissette singing in my living room. 74 00:03:33,260 --> 00:03:35,421 - I cannot wait. - She's fantastic. 75 00:03:35,462 --> 00:03:37,362 That first album... the song "You Oughta Know"... 76 00:03:37,397 --> 00:03:39,865 And she's referring to this "Mr. Duplicity"... 77 00:03:39,900 --> 00:03:42,095 Larry has no idea what we're talking about. 78 00:03:42,135 --> 00:03:45,901 When you said "Mr. Duplicity," I thought you were referring to me... 79 00:03:45,939 --> 00:03:48,567 You know who it's about? Her guitar player. 80 00:03:48,608 --> 00:03:50,701 No, it's a big secret. She's never said. 81 00:03:50,744 --> 00:03:52,712 She has never... she's never said. 82 00:03:52,746 --> 00:03:56,011 It was an actor in a sitcom about a family. 83 00:03:56,049 --> 00:03:59,212 Yeah, or I think I've heard her manager. But it's this huge secret. 84 00:03:59,252 --> 00:04:01,220 She'll tell me. People confide in me. 85 00:04:01,254 --> 00:04:03,950 - She'll open up to you, Larry. - Everybody opens up to me. 86 00:04:03,990 --> 00:04:06,550 I'll find out. I'm gonna find out the big secret. 87 00:04:06,593 --> 00:04:09,255 - Okay, good. - Your parents are out here? 88 00:04:09,296 --> 00:04:12,231 Yeah, yeah, they moved out. 89 00:04:12,265 --> 00:04:14,529 - How's your mom? - Ah, you know, so-so. 90 00:04:14,568 --> 00:04:15,899 Yeah. 91 00:04:15,936 --> 00:04:19,303 - Who could go for some wine? - I could, yeah. 92 00:04:19,339 --> 00:04:22,103 - Oh, that was good. - That was great. 93 00:04:22,142 --> 00:04:25,202 It's official. I'm now full. 94 00:04:25,245 --> 00:04:27,975 Now you are. The Fat Boy's Special. 95 00:04:28,014 --> 00:04:29,811 You're done? 96 00:04:29,849 --> 00:04:31,510 I'll go to the little fat boy's room. 97 00:04:31,551 --> 00:04:34,281 I know, okay. He knows. 98 00:04:34,321 --> 00:04:37,154 - It's the Fat Boy's Special. - Look what you've done. 99 00:04:37,190 --> 00:04:39,522 He knows. 100 00:04:51,905 --> 00:04:53,770 Well, it was good to see you guys again. 101 00:04:53,807 --> 00:04:57,265 It was great to see you. I probably won't till... 102 00:04:57,310 --> 00:04:59,938 - Probably the benefit. - Yeah. 103 00:05:04,250 --> 00:05:07,242 I said don't pick up the check! 104 00:05:07,287 --> 00:05:09,278 Well, last night was it, believe me. 105 00:05:09,322 --> 00:05:11,790 All right, I'm going out. 106 00:05:11,825 --> 00:05:13,622 All right. 107 00:05:13,660 --> 00:05:15,287 What will I do about Mindy Reiser? 108 00:05:15,328 --> 00:05:17,091 I wish I could make it up to her. 109 00:05:17,130 --> 00:05:19,928 I could've at least asked about the perfume store. 110 00:05:19,966 --> 00:05:22,662 People love when you ask them about what they're doing. 111 00:05:22,702 --> 00:05:25,398 Next time you see her just be nice to her. 112 00:05:25,438 --> 00:05:28,601 She thinks I'm the world's biggest schmuck. 113 00:05:28,642 --> 00:05:31,543 Hey, Larry. I got to talk to Cheryl. 114 00:05:31,578 --> 00:05:33,808 Hey, Wanda, what's going on? 115 00:05:33,847 --> 00:05:35,815 I have some news. 116 00:05:35,849 --> 00:05:38,181 Are you okay? 117 00:05:38,218 --> 00:05:40,186 Yeah, and no. 118 00:05:40,220 --> 00:05:42,245 But I got to tell you something. 119 00:05:42,288 --> 00:05:44,256 You might as well get over here too. 120 00:05:44,290 --> 00:05:47,088 Oh, my God, you're so serious. 121 00:05:47,127 --> 00:05:50,290 - It's big. - What's going on? 122 00:05:50,330 --> 00:05:53,231 Okay. My brother... 123 00:05:53,266 --> 00:05:55,257 his best friend works for the CIA. 124 00:05:55,301 --> 00:05:59,135 He got this information from the highest source possible. 125 00:05:59,172 --> 00:06:01,640 There is going to be a terrorist attack 126 00:06:01,675 --> 00:06:04,508 this weekend in LA. 127 00:06:06,646 --> 00:06:08,944 Yeah, and you cannot tell a soul. 128 00:06:10,517 --> 00:06:13,179 My brother told me, but I'm not supposed to tell anybody. 129 00:06:13,219 --> 00:06:16,484 But you know, you my girl, I had to tell you. 130 00:06:16,523 --> 00:06:18,718 - Thank you. - I'm getting out of town. 131 00:06:18,758 --> 00:06:21,226 I'm going to Vegas with my boyfriend. 132 00:06:21,261 --> 00:06:24,321 - I advise y'all to do the same. - What kind of attack? 133 00:06:24,364 --> 00:06:26,662 Attack, Larry. Anthrax, a bomb, I don't know. 134 00:06:26,700 --> 00:06:28,531 It could be something crazy. 135 00:06:28,568 --> 00:06:30,058 And this is... 136 00:06:30,103 --> 00:06:33,334 They said it's 90% sure that something's gonna go down. 137 00:06:33,373 --> 00:06:36,274 - Why can't we tell anybody? - They don't want panic, Cheryl. 138 00:06:36,309 --> 00:06:38,334 That's why they're not telling anybody. 139 00:06:38,378 --> 00:06:40,437 We got to get out of here. 140 00:06:40,480 --> 00:06:44,780 - Yeah, get out of here. - This weekend there's a big... 141 00:06:44,818 --> 00:06:48,447 NRDC benefit that we've been working on for months. 142 00:06:48,488 --> 00:06:50,718 Alanis Morissette is gonna be there. 143 00:06:50,757 --> 00:06:52,588 I'm just, I'm thinking out loud. 144 00:06:52,625 --> 00:06:54,889 Why don't we call the terrorists and ask them 145 00:06:54,928 --> 00:06:57,692 could they pick another weekend more suited for you? 146 00:06:57,731 --> 00:07:00,393 Postpone the benefit, let's get out of here. 147 00:07:00,433 --> 00:07:03,095 I thought I'd never say this, but Larry's right. 148 00:07:03,136 --> 00:07:05,570 If we don't show up at the benefit, 149 00:07:05,605 --> 00:07:08,369 - what will people... - lf? What? 150 00:07:09,943 --> 00:07:12,844 Look, okay, I did my part. 151 00:07:12,879 --> 00:07:15,006 You're my friend, I had to tell you. 152 00:07:15,048 --> 00:07:17,016 - Thank you. - I'm going to Vegas. 153 00:07:17,050 --> 00:07:19,314 - Okay, okay. - Y'all out your mind. 154 00:07:19,352 --> 00:07:22,685 I'm trying to help people, they're talking about a benefit. 155 00:07:22,722 --> 00:07:25,054 Call me when you get back into town. 156 00:07:25,091 --> 00:07:27,924 Hopefully you'll be here. 157 00:07:29,262 --> 00:07:31,822 Wow. 158 00:07:31,865 --> 00:07:34,925 Yeah, Larry. 159 00:07:34,968 --> 00:07:38,028 I just don't see how we can leave this weekend. 160 00:07:38,071 --> 00:07:41,973 This whole NRDC benefit was my idea. 161 00:07:42,008 --> 00:07:44,476 I talked the Braudys into having it at their house. 162 00:07:44,511 --> 00:07:47,503 Alanis Morissette is coming to sing. 163 00:07:47,547 --> 00:07:49,640 I mean, I just... 164 00:07:51,284 --> 00:07:53,514 I just know I can't leave town. 165 00:07:55,054 --> 00:07:58,319 Well, maybe... 166 00:07:59,626 --> 00:08:02,993 you know, maybe I can... 167 00:08:03,029 --> 00:08:05,054 I can go. 168 00:08:05,098 --> 00:08:07,692 And where are you gonna go? 169 00:08:09,302 --> 00:08:15,332 I could go golfing at Pebble Beach, maybe? 170 00:08:17,477 --> 00:08:20,742 Mm-hmm. Do you think that's a good idea? 171 00:08:23,716 --> 00:08:26,207 For us to be apart if something did happen? 172 00:08:26,252 --> 00:08:30,154 Then at least, you know, one of us would... 173 00:08:30,190 --> 00:08:33,591 survive. 174 00:08:33,626 --> 00:08:35,355 It just seems like if we're gonna go, 175 00:08:35,395 --> 00:08:38,831 - we should go together. - Not necessarily. 176 00:08:42,969 --> 00:08:47,133 Almost seems a little... selfish 177 00:08:47,173 --> 00:08:51,234 that you would want both of us to... 178 00:08:52,378 --> 00:08:55,211 perish. 179 00:08:57,250 --> 00:09:00,242 So, you'd be fine going on without me? 180 00:09:01,988 --> 00:09:04,456 Well, it would be... 181 00:09:05,458 --> 00:09:08,859 very difficult at first, I'm sure. 182 00:09:08,895 --> 00:09:12,262 But hopefully I could at some point 183 00:09:12,298 --> 00:09:16,166 get back some semblance of a life. 184 00:09:17,170 --> 00:09:20,003 Okay... 185 00:09:20,039 --> 00:09:23,065 if you feel good about... 186 00:09:23,109 --> 00:09:27,011 one of us... dying 187 00:09:27,046 --> 00:09:28,673 and the other one surviving, 188 00:09:28,715 --> 00:09:32,344 and you can live with that for the rest of your life, 189 00:09:32,385 --> 00:09:36,685 then you should go golf this weekend. 190 00:09:38,224 --> 00:09:41,921 - I'll think about it. - Think about it. 191 00:10:05,251 --> 00:10:07,219 Hey, Mindy. 192 00:10:07,253 --> 00:10:09,881 Oh, Larry. Paul's not here. 193 00:10:09,923 --> 00:10:13,689 I came actually to see you. Do you have a few minutes? 194 00:10:13,726 --> 00:10:15,956 I need to talk to you, it's pretty important. 195 00:10:15,995 --> 00:10:18,088 - You came to see me? - Yeah. 196 00:10:18,131 --> 00:10:19,462 What for? 197 00:10:19,499 --> 00:10:23,299 Okay, this is going to sound a little crazy. 198 00:10:23,336 --> 00:10:26,305 But believe me, it's all true. 199 00:10:26,339 --> 00:10:29,797 I have a friend who has a friend 200 00:10:29,842 --> 00:10:33,107 whose brother works in the CIA. 201 00:10:33,146 --> 00:10:37,981 And he has it from the highest possible source 202 00:10:38,017 --> 00:10:40,986 that there's going to be a terrorist attack 203 00:10:41,020 --> 00:10:45,286 on Los Angeles this weekend. 204 00:10:45,325 --> 00:10:47,122 - It sounds crazy. - You're putting me on. 205 00:10:47,160 --> 00:10:49,287 - I'm not putting you on. - This is a joke. 206 00:10:49,329 --> 00:10:52,594 - Larry, come on. - This is not a joke, this is the truth. 207 00:10:52,632 --> 00:10:54,623 - Paul put you up to this? - No, he didn't. 208 00:10:54,667 --> 00:10:56,692 I haven't even spoken to him. 209 00:10:56,736 --> 00:10:59,102 You have a contact in the government? 210 00:10:59,138 --> 00:11:02,801 - Totally reliable. - Are you serious? 211 00:11:02,842 --> 00:11:08,075 Mindy, your life is in danger. Get out of here. 212 00:11:08,114 --> 00:11:10,082 What kind of attack is it gonna be? 213 00:11:10,116 --> 00:11:12,141 - It wasn't very specific. - Where? 214 00:11:12,185 --> 00:11:14,585 It could be anywhere. It's in LA. 215 00:11:14,620 --> 00:11:17,987 Oh my God, I can't believe it. Oh my God, all right. 216 00:11:18,024 --> 00:11:19,321 Okay? 217 00:11:19,359 --> 00:11:21,589 I have to call my sister. 218 00:11:21,627 --> 00:11:24,027 No, no, no, you can't tell anybody. 219 00:11:24,063 --> 00:11:26,122 I have to call my mother. She's 80 years old. 220 00:11:26,165 --> 00:11:29,066 She can't survive a terrorist attack. 221 00:11:29,102 --> 00:11:31,263 You can't say anything, Mindy. 222 00:11:31,304 --> 00:11:34,171 Okay, she lives in Orange County. She's kind of far away. 223 00:11:34,207 --> 00:11:36,971 They're not going to Orange County, the terrorists. 224 00:11:37,010 --> 00:11:39,308 They have nothing in Orange County. 225 00:11:39,345 --> 00:11:41,313 So we've got to get out of town, huh? 226 00:11:41,347 --> 00:11:43,781 - Absolutely. - Maybe we'll go to the desert. 227 00:11:43,816 --> 00:11:45,875 Maybe that will be good? Palm Springs? 228 00:11:45,918 --> 00:11:49,877 Palm Springs, why not? It's 90 minutes, very nice. 229 00:11:49,922 --> 00:11:52,390 Where do you stay when you're there? 230 00:11:52,425 --> 00:11:53,949 - Four Seasons. - Four Seasons? 231 00:11:53,993 --> 00:11:55,961 Yeah. 232 00:11:55,995 --> 00:11:58,657 Maybe we'll go there, or up north. 233 00:11:58,698 --> 00:12:01,166 Santa Barbara is lovely this time of year. 234 00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:02,633 Where are you and Cheryl going? 235 00:12:02,668 --> 00:12:06,229 Unfortunately, we can't go. 236 00:12:06,272 --> 00:12:08,240 You can't... 237 00:12:08,274 --> 00:12:12,301 oh, the Braudys' NRDC event. 238 00:12:12,345 --> 00:12:15,974 - You know about that thing, huh? - Of course I know about it. 239 00:12:16,015 --> 00:12:18,711 Our invitation got "lost in the mail" or something. 240 00:12:18,751 --> 00:12:21,481 - I don't want to get in the middle... - No, listen, 241 00:12:21,521 --> 00:12:24,012 I know you and Cheryl don't have anything to do with it. 242 00:12:24,057 --> 00:12:25,820 It's between us and the Braudys. 243 00:12:25,858 --> 00:12:27,792 But it's amazing you are staying in town 244 00:12:27,827 --> 00:12:30,523 risking your lives for something like this. 245 00:12:30,563 --> 00:12:33,123 It's unbelievable. 246 00:12:33,166 --> 00:12:35,498 Cheryl wanted to leave, 247 00:12:35,535 --> 00:12:38,197 I thought it's best that we go to the benefit. 248 00:12:38,237 --> 00:12:42,401 It's amazing. I have a million things to do, 249 00:12:42,442 --> 00:12:44,740 but I'm curious about something. 250 00:12:44,777 --> 00:12:48,110 - Why did you tell me? - What are you talking about? 251 00:12:48,147 --> 00:12:51,173 You're friends, we like you so much, 252 00:12:51,217 --> 00:12:53,344 you and Paul, you know. I was driving around, 253 00:12:53,386 --> 00:12:56,981 I saw your shop, I thought, "I've got to tell Mindy." 254 00:12:57,023 --> 00:12:59,048 I have really misjudged you. 255 00:12:59,092 --> 00:13:02,425 I can't thank you enough. You are an amazing person. 256 00:13:02,462 --> 00:13:05,397 You are a wonderful human being. 257 00:13:05,431 --> 00:13:08,525 - I can't thank you enough. - I'm trying to be a good friend. 258 00:13:08,568 --> 00:13:11,332 I understand. Listen! I have some samples. 259 00:13:11,370 --> 00:13:14,134 I want you to take these. 260 00:13:14,173 --> 00:13:17,700 Give them to Cheryl, okay? With my love. 261 00:13:17,743 --> 00:13:20,439 Here you go. She'll like these. 262 00:13:20,480 --> 00:13:25,850 - Nothing for men? - Oh, yeah, here. 263 00:13:25,885 --> 00:13:29,981 You'll like these. This is aftershave. 264 00:13:30,022 --> 00:13:32,149 - Uh-huh. - This is before-shave. 265 00:13:35,428 --> 00:13:38,920 Got you some of these samples. 266 00:13:38,965 --> 00:13:40,592 What? 267 00:13:40,633 --> 00:13:45,366 These are moisturizers from Mindy Reiser's shop. 268 00:13:45,404 --> 00:13:48,532 Really? I wish I would've known you were going. 269 00:13:48,574 --> 00:13:52,101 She carries that perfume Wanda wears that I love. 270 00:13:52,145 --> 00:13:55,114 Would've had you pick me up a bottle. Why did you go there? 271 00:13:55,148 --> 00:14:01,053 To kind of... apologize for the other night. 272 00:14:01,087 --> 00:14:04,545 Larry David... apologize? 273 00:14:04,590 --> 00:14:06,649 - That's very... - Why, is that unusual? 274 00:14:06,692 --> 00:14:08,990 It's unusual, yes, highly unusual, yes. 275 00:14:09,028 --> 00:14:11,189 I feel like I apologize to somebody every day. 276 00:14:11,230 --> 00:14:14,461 - Are you kidding me? - Who says "I'm sorry" more than me? 277 00:14:14,500 --> 00:14:17,162 Do you know anybody in the world? 278 00:14:17,203 --> 00:14:19,637 I'll get it. Hello. 279 00:14:19,672 --> 00:14:23,164 - Hi, Paul. Yeah... - Paul Reiser? 280 00:14:24,410 --> 00:14:25,877 Hello? 281 00:14:25,912 --> 00:14:27,903 Hey. 282 00:14:27,947 --> 00:14:31,075 Yeah, pretty much. 283 00:14:33,553 --> 00:14:37,421 Yeah, l... well... 284 00:14:37,456 --> 00:14:39,583 I don't know. 90%. 285 00:14:41,394 --> 00:14:45,660 Well, hey, come on. Of course, no problem. 286 00:14:45,698 --> 00:14:47,893 I'm happy to. 287 00:14:47,934 --> 00:14:51,768 Yeah, okay. Well, you take care. 288 00:14:51,804 --> 00:14:54,398 - All right, bye. - What was that about? 289 00:14:56,309 --> 00:15:00,439 Oh, you know, I went to apologize to his wife. 290 00:15:00,479 --> 00:15:03,414 Oh. And what was "90%"? 291 00:15:05,718 --> 00:15:07,686 He asked me what the chances were 292 00:15:07,720 --> 00:15:11,918 that this could happen again... 293 00:15:11,958 --> 00:15:14,290 - that I'd ignore her. - Right. 294 00:15:14,327 --> 00:15:17,125 Listen, I've been doing a lot of thinking, 295 00:15:17,163 --> 00:15:19,927 I really think we should reconsider going... 296 00:15:19,966 --> 00:15:22,025 we should get out of here, don't you think? 297 00:15:22,068 --> 00:15:23,262 No. 298 00:15:23,302 --> 00:15:25,395 This is crazy, to hang around here. What for? 299 00:15:25,438 --> 00:15:28,202 We are gonna stay right here. 300 00:15:30,142 --> 00:15:32,474 - Where are all the cars? - I don't know. 301 00:15:32,511 --> 00:15:36,572 Is there a valet we missed or something? 302 00:15:39,852 --> 00:15:41,615 - Hi. - Hey, Stu. 303 00:15:41,654 --> 00:15:44,680 Hi, Larry and Cheryl. 304 00:15:44,724 --> 00:15:46,589 - Come on in. - Thank you. 305 00:15:46,626 --> 00:15:48,719 - Where's all the cars? - Please come in. 306 00:15:48,761 --> 00:15:51,252 The party's in full swing. Come on. 307 00:15:56,369 --> 00:15:58,166 Are we the first ones here? 308 00:15:58,204 --> 00:16:01,196 Where is everybody? 309 00:16:01,240 --> 00:16:03,231 I'm actually surprised you're here, 310 00:16:03,276 --> 00:16:05,801 'cause, you know, there's a terrorist attack 311 00:16:05,845 --> 00:16:09,713 that is going to "take out the entire city of Los Angeles." 312 00:16:09,749 --> 00:16:12,013 Some time this weekend. 313 00:16:12,051 --> 00:16:14,952 You'll notice Alanis Morissette is not here. 314 00:16:14,987 --> 00:16:16,978 - Obviously. - She got very nervous, 315 00:16:17,023 --> 00:16:18,854 - she said she wouldn't sing. - She left town. 316 00:16:18,891 --> 00:16:20,984 - Really? - Gone. Yeah. 317 00:16:21,027 --> 00:16:25,361 - 'Cause she heard...? - Apparently the word kind of spread. 318 00:16:25,398 --> 00:16:27,366 It sounds like it might've started 319 00:16:27,400 --> 00:16:29,425 with Mindy Reiser. 320 00:16:31,337 --> 00:16:33,805 And guess who told Mindy? 321 00:16:33,839 --> 00:16:35,773 Who? 322 00:16:37,643 --> 00:16:40,305 - Me? - What? 323 00:16:40,346 --> 00:16:44,282 - No...! - You told Mindy Reiser about this? 324 00:16:44,317 --> 00:16:46,251 Okay, so you knew? 325 00:16:46,285 --> 00:16:47,912 This is exactly what Wanda said! 326 00:16:47,953 --> 00:16:50,717 She said don't cause a panic, don't tell people. 327 00:16:50,756 --> 00:16:52,656 Did we not have this discussion? 328 00:16:52,692 --> 00:16:56,890 - It's a little embarrassing... - This is a little embarrassing. 329 00:16:56,929 --> 00:17:00,330 This is humiliating beyond belief is what this is. 330 00:17:00,366 --> 00:17:03,267 I felt bad because I snubbed Mindy at dinner the other night, 331 00:17:03,302 --> 00:17:04,963 I didn't talk to her and l... 332 00:17:05,004 --> 00:17:08,337 Told her there'd be a terrorist attack in Los Angeles this weekend? 333 00:17:08,374 --> 00:17:10,274 There was supposed to be one! 334 00:17:10,309 --> 00:17:12,641 - You tell Mindy Reiser? - She has betrayed us... 335 00:17:12,678 --> 00:17:16,409 Time after time. She opens her mouth. You can't tell that woman anything. 336 00:17:16,449 --> 00:17:18,417 Why do you think we don't talk to her? 337 00:17:18,451 --> 00:17:20,783 - I don't know! - She has a big mouth! 338 00:17:20,820 --> 00:17:22,720 And by the way, Larry, 339 00:17:22,755 --> 00:17:25,451 thank you for telling us about this terrorist attack. 340 00:17:25,491 --> 00:17:27,618 - I didn't tell anybody else. - You told Mindy. 341 00:17:27,660 --> 00:17:29,127 That's really nice of you. 342 00:17:29,161 --> 00:17:31,322 Why don't you call your friends, the Reisers? 343 00:17:31,364 --> 00:17:33,457 Why don't you have a little bite with them? 344 00:17:33,499 --> 00:17:35,967 Since you snubbed them and all, go ahead, all right? 345 00:17:36,001 --> 00:17:37,969 I am going to bed. 346 00:17:38,003 --> 00:17:41,131 Have a little bite with the Reisers. 347 00:17:41,173 --> 00:17:44,108 At least they pick up a check every now and then. 348 00:17:44,143 --> 00:17:46,668 - What the hell does that mean? - What? 349 00:17:46,712 --> 00:17:48,942 I know what you do every time the check comes... 350 00:17:48,981 --> 00:17:51,108 you run to the bathroom. 351 00:17:51,150 --> 00:17:53,710 - Oh, fuck you. - Honey, don't! 352 00:17:53,753 --> 00:17:55,721 You don't think I know about that bathroom trick? 353 00:17:55,755 --> 00:17:58,815 - I invented that trick. - Go to hell! 354 00:17:58,858 --> 00:18:01,793 The "bathroom trick"? I got a problem, a medical problem. 355 00:18:01,827 --> 00:18:04,387 Yeah, you got a problem paying money. 356 00:18:07,299 --> 00:18:10,427 - No, thank you. - I'll take one, thanks. 357 00:18:12,505 --> 00:18:15,770 Mmm, very good. 358 00:18:17,243 --> 00:18:20,770 - Who's the chef? - I don't know. 359 00:18:22,948 --> 00:18:25,348 - I shouldn't ask. - I don't think you should. 360 00:18:25,384 --> 00:18:27,852 Thank you... okay, that's enough, come on. 361 00:18:27,887 --> 00:18:30,321 I just want to know, for the restaurant. 362 00:18:31,991 --> 00:18:36,087 Were you not listening when Wanda told you not to tell anybody? 363 00:18:36,128 --> 00:18:38,426 She trusted you not to say anything to anyone. 364 00:18:38,464 --> 00:18:41,160 Why in the world would you tell Mindy Reiser? 365 00:18:41,200 --> 00:18:45,227 I was trying to get on her good side. 366 00:18:56,348 --> 00:18:58,543 I guess what we should do is have it here. 367 00:18:58,584 --> 00:18:59,710 What? 368 00:18:59,752 --> 00:19:01,845 Reschedule the benefit and have it here. 369 00:19:01,887 --> 00:19:04,082 Okay. 370 00:19:05,991 --> 00:19:08,789 And I'll have to ask the Braudys to come over. 371 00:19:08,828 --> 00:19:11,888 The Braudys? No, no, no. They're not coming, forget it. 372 00:19:11,931 --> 00:19:13,865 They went way over the line tonight. 373 00:19:13,899 --> 00:19:16,424 Invite the Reisers, not the Braudys. 374 00:19:16,469 --> 00:19:18,630 Invite the Reisers for spite. 375 00:19:18,671 --> 00:19:21,139 This isn't a game, Larry. 376 00:19:21,173 --> 00:19:23,539 Braudys "freaking." 377 00:19:23,576 --> 00:19:26,044 Everything's "freaking" with this guy. He can't say the word fuck? 378 00:19:26,078 --> 00:19:29,377 I can understand why they'd be upset, Larry. 379 00:19:29,415 --> 00:19:32,384 Freaking asshole. 380 00:19:39,124 --> 00:19:41,285 You don't gargle much, do you? 381 00:19:41,327 --> 00:19:45,263 It's fun. You should think about it. 382 00:19:45,297 --> 00:19:47,322 You should think about how much money 383 00:19:47,366 --> 00:19:49,459 you just lost for the NRDC. 384 00:19:52,071 --> 00:19:53,971 N-E-S-T-L-E-S 385 00:19:54,006 --> 00:19:59,569 Nestle's makes the very best 386 00:19:59,612 --> 00:20:02,479 Sorr-ry. 387 00:20:09,522 --> 00:20:12,821 Hey, Larry, how come you never told me? 388 00:20:12,858 --> 00:20:15,486 I heard there was supposed to be a terrorist attack 389 00:20:15,528 --> 00:20:18,053 and you knew about it? How come you never told me? 390 00:20:18,097 --> 00:20:21,157 I wasn't allowed to tell anyone. 391 00:20:21,200 --> 00:20:22,997 You told somebody. 392 00:20:23,035 --> 00:20:25,265 I mean, I found out. 393 00:20:25,304 --> 00:20:27,101 So you could've told me something. 394 00:20:27,139 --> 00:20:30,768 I could... there were too many people, I wasn't supposed to. 395 00:20:30,809 --> 00:20:33,505 My kids could've been wiped out. They go to school. 396 00:20:33,546 --> 00:20:35,776 I'm sorry, but it's okay, nothing happened. 397 00:20:35,814 --> 00:20:37,839 I know, but something could've happened. 398 00:20:37,883 --> 00:20:39,783 We could've been killed, you know? 399 00:20:39,818 --> 00:20:42,582 - You could've given me a hint. - Next time, I'll tell you. 400 00:20:42,621 --> 00:20:44,589 Take your kids out of the school or something like that. 401 00:20:44,623 --> 00:20:46,318 I'll tell you next time, I'm sorry. 402 00:20:46,358 --> 00:20:49,452 You could've said something. 403 00:20:49,495 --> 00:20:51,520 Let me call you back. 404 00:20:53,232 --> 00:20:56,224 - Do you have a minute? - Yeah. 405 00:20:56,268 --> 00:20:57,997 Larry, I can't believe that you knew 406 00:20:58,037 --> 00:21:00,164 there was a terrorist threat and didn't tell me. 407 00:21:00,205 --> 00:21:01,934 Here we go with this again. 408 00:21:01,974 --> 00:21:04,067 - Me? - I couldn't tell anyone. 409 00:21:04,109 --> 00:21:07,010 I'm the person that's here for you five days a week. 410 00:21:07,046 --> 00:21:09,446 I've taken your laundry and dry cleaning. 411 00:21:09,481 --> 00:21:12,848 I didn't tell a lot of people. I only told one person. 412 00:21:12,885 --> 00:21:16,480 - You've told me secrets before. - I'm sorry. 413 00:21:16,522 --> 00:21:20,049 I'm sorry. Now I have to have everybody mad at me, 414 00:21:20,092 --> 00:21:21,992 'cause I didn't tell everybody I know? 415 00:21:22,027 --> 00:21:24,825 It's not my fault, I told one person. 416 00:21:26,632 --> 00:21:28,361 Wanda is here, she's in the restroom. 417 00:21:28,400 --> 00:21:30,925 She'll be out in a minute. She'd like to speak with you. 418 00:21:30,970 --> 00:21:33,700 Hey, big mouth! 419 00:21:35,040 --> 00:21:37,975 What did I tell you, Larry? 420 00:21:40,646 --> 00:21:42,773 Do you think this'll get me out of the dog house? 421 00:21:42,815 --> 00:21:44,646 - This is hard to find. - Can I smell that? 422 00:21:44,683 --> 00:21:48,779 Yeah, oh yeah. That's the one Wanda got. 423 00:21:48,821 --> 00:21:51,221 That's it, yeah. I hope it does the trick. 424 00:21:51,256 --> 00:21:54,282 Paul and I spent the whole weekend in Palm Springs. 425 00:21:55,628 --> 00:21:58,062 - It was really a disruption. - Yeah. 426 00:21:58,097 --> 00:22:00,088 To pack up and leave like that. 427 00:22:00,132 --> 00:22:01,929 I'm sorry there wasn't an attack. 428 00:22:01,967 --> 00:22:05,403 Well, Larry, I know that you had the best of intentions. 429 00:22:05,437 --> 00:22:08,463 But my God, it was a huge inconvenience for us. 430 00:22:08,507 --> 00:22:11,032 I was just trying to save your life. 431 00:22:11,076 --> 00:22:13,738 Yes, I know. We drove three hours to the desert 432 00:22:13,779 --> 00:22:17,078 with the dog and the cats. Four Seasons was booked. 433 00:22:17,116 --> 00:22:19,744 We ended up staying at a Super Eight motel. 434 00:22:19,785 --> 00:22:22,777 - It was awful. - I'm sorry I mentioned anything. 435 00:22:22,821 --> 00:22:25,255 I tried to be a nice guy, I'm trying to save your life, 436 00:22:25,290 --> 00:22:27,588 and you have a terrible weekend on my account. 437 00:22:27,626 --> 00:22:28,991 Larry, no, I understand. 438 00:22:29,028 --> 00:22:33,192 It would've been nice if there was a small explosion, where nobody got hurt. 439 00:22:33,232 --> 00:22:35,063 A little firecracker or something. 440 00:22:35,100 --> 00:22:38,558 What happened with you? How did the NRDC thing go? 441 00:22:38,604 --> 00:22:41,767 - Not too good. - What happened? 442 00:22:41,807 --> 00:22:44,833 - Nobody showed up. - Why not? 443 00:22:44,877 --> 00:22:48,438 Everybody heard about the terrorist attack 444 00:22:48,480 --> 00:22:50,971 and left town. 445 00:22:51,016 --> 00:22:54,076 Oh my God. 446 00:22:54,119 --> 00:22:56,451 'Cause I didn't say anything, I was wondering 447 00:22:56,488 --> 00:22:58,888 if perhaps you had mentioned something to anyone. 448 00:22:58,924 --> 00:23:02,325 Why would I say anything? You told me not to. 449 00:23:04,496 --> 00:23:06,987 - Oh, that's terrible... - Hey, it's Martin Short. 450 00:23:07,032 --> 00:23:09,830 - Larry? - I know him. 451 00:23:09,868 --> 00:23:12,769 Larry! Lar... 452 00:23:14,106 --> 00:23:16,574 Marty! 453 00:23:16,608 --> 00:23:20,738 Larry! Oh my God, Larry, how are you? 454 00:23:20,779 --> 00:23:22,872 - Good. How you doing? - I'm good. How are you? 455 00:23:22,915 --> 00:23:24,940 Good. How's your show doing on the Comedy Central? 456 00:23:24,983 --> 00:23:26,746 You do that big fat guy... 457 00:23:26,785 --> 00:23:28,412 - "Prime Time Glick." - "Prime time Glick"? 458 00:23:28,454 --> 00:23:31,355 How do you do that voice? I try and do it at home. 459 00:23:31,390 --> 00:23:34,882 It's ranges that go high and then go very low. 460 00:23:34,927 --> 00:23:36,986 "Ranges that go high and then go very low." 461 00:23:37,029 --> 00:23:40,988 But you're not going low... high, very high. 462 00:23:41,033 --> 00:23:42,295 Very high... 463 00:23:42,334 --> 00:23:44,063 No, that sounds like Miss Piggy. 464 00:23:44,103 --> 00:23:46,128 It's not that at all. 465 00:23:46,171 --> 00:23:48,731 It's much more... not to pat myself on the back, 466 00:23:48,774 --> 00:23:50,537 much more original. 467 00:23:50,576 --> 00:23:52,009 Oh, my goodness, Larry David. 468 00:23:52,044 --> 00:23:53,534 "Oh, my goodness, Larry David." 469 00:23:53,579 --> 00:23:56,275 - How wonderful to see you. - "How wonderful to see yoo-ou." 470 00:23:56,315 --> 00:23:59,978 You have that kind of flat New Yawk thing. 471 00:24:00,018 --> 00:24:02,452 Well, let me try one more time. 472 00:24:02,488 --> 00:24:05,855 High, and then low. 473 00:24:05,891 --> 00:24:07,654 And then be stunned in the middle. 474 00:24:07,693 --> 00:24:11,493 No, now you've had a stroke. 475 00:24:11,530 --> 00:24:15,022 You don't want to play a stroke victim, 'cause that's... urrgh! 476 00:24:15,067 --> 00:24:17,297 Oh, Jesus. You know what? 477 00:24:17,336 --> 00:24:20,794 I left her hanging in the store. She's gonna be mad. 478 00:24:20,839 --> 00:24:22,932 There are more impersonations I'd love to teach you. 479 00:24:22,975 --> 00:24:26,103 - Well, good to see you. - Okay. Good to see you, Larry. 480 00:24:37,923 --> 00:24:39,788 Pick it up... just a little closer. 481 00:24:39,825 --> 00:24:41,588 We may not even need this actually. 482 00:24:41,627 --> 00:24:43,219 - I don't know about that. - I don't know. 483 00:24:43,262 --> 00:24:45,127 The acoustics are great in this house. 484 00:24:45,164 --> 00:24:46,631 And you would know because... 485 00:24:46,665 --> 00:24:48,860 We often have Friday night services here. 486 00:24:48,901 --> 00:24:51,734 Oh, my God, this is so exciting. 487 00:24:51,770 --> 00:24:54,739 I am so excited. 488 00:24:54,773 --> 00:24:57,799 I'm acting like I'm not thrilled to be sitting here with you, 489 00:24:57,843 --> 00:24:59,811 but I am just out of my mind right now. 490 00:24:59,845 --> 00:25:01,278 Me too, I've been urinating all day. 491 00:25:01,313 --> 00:25:04,544 Really? That's the effect I often have on people. 492 00:25:05,984 --> 00:25:07,952 You've got to be kidding me?! 493 00:25:07,986 --> 00:25:10,648 They invited the Reisers and not us? 494 00:25:10,689 --> 00:25:14,921 I don't know what I'm gonna do, but I'm gonna do something. 495 00:25:22,067 --> 00:25:23,694 Thank you. 496 00:25:23,735 --> 00:25:25,532 Thanks for coming over. I can't wait for tonight. 497 00:25:25,571 --> 00:25:27,129 Yeah, me too. I'll see you guys. 498 00:25:27,172 --> 00:25:29,572 Okay, see you later. 499 00:25:29,608 --> 00:25:31,007 All right. 500 00:25:31,043 --> 00:25:33,739 Hey, you gonna do, "You Oughta Know"? 501 00:25:33,779 --> 00:25:36,441 We can. You want that one? 502 00:25:36,481 --> 00:25:39,780 Yeah. That would be good. 503 00:25:39,818 --> 00:25:41,877 We haven't done it in a while so we can do it... 504 00:25:41,920 --> 00:25:43,319 the unplugged version. 505 00:25:43,355 --> 00:25:46,586 A lot of discussion about that song. 506 00:25:46,625 --> 00:25:48,354 Yeah, nonstop for a while. 507 00:25:48,393 --> 00:25:50,258 It's dying down a little bit, thank God. 508 00:25:50,295 --> 00:25:53,128 You never tell anybody, huh? 509 00:25:53,165 --> 00:25:55,099 No. I purposely don't tell anybody 510 00:25:55,133 --> 00:25:57,101 because it's not what the song is written for. 511 00:25:57,135 --> 00:25:59,330 Sure, I understand. Ever want to unburden yourself, 512 00:25:59,371 --> 00:26:01,737 I just want you to know... 513 00:26:01,773 --> 00:26:04,207 I won't tell a soul I won't even tell her. 514 00:26:04,243 --> 00:26:05,767 - Really? - Absolutely. 515 00:26:05,811 --> 00:26:08,678 You guys don't have pillow talk where you divulge things? 516 00:26:08,714 --> 00:26:10,978 When people tell me something, they only tell me. 517 00:26:11,016 --> 00:26:13,507 - They don't tell both of us. - All right, that's cool. 518 00:26:13,552 --> 00:26:16,419 I haven't really told anyone. It would be maybe 519 00:26:16,455 --> 00:26:19,549 good to... I'll tell you. 520 00:26:19,591 --> 00:26:22,458 But you can't tell anybody. 521 00:26:22,494 --> 00:26:24,724 Don't worry, I won't say a word. 522 00:26:36,408 --> 00:26:38,171 Hmm, interesting. 523 00:26:38,210 --> 00:26:40,940 So that's who it is. I'll see you later. 524 00:26:40,979 --> 00:26:43,573 - All right, see you later. - Yeah, bye. 525 00:26:45,484 --> 00:26:47,349 What did I miss? 526 00:26:47,386 --> 00:26:49,650 She was telling me what songs she'll do and all that. 527 00:26:49,688 --> 00:26:51,178 Oh, okay. 528 00:26:51,223 --> 00:26:52,850 I'll make these guys a sandwich real quick. 529 00:26:52,891 --> 00:26:54,722 - Do you want something? - No. 530 00:26:54,760 --> 00:26:56,387 - No, you're good? - Yeah. 531 00:26:56,428 --> 00:26:59,420 Okay. Okay. 532 00:26:59,464 --> 00:27:01,295 Why don't you guys come back here with me? 533 00:27:01,333 --> 00:27:03,858 - I'll see what I can do. - Thanks. Cool. 534 00:27:09,007 --> 00:27:11,498 - Jesus. - You didn't even freaking look. 535 00:27:11,543 --> 00:27:13,306 You come flying down the hill... 536 00:27:13,345 --> 00:27:14,937 You were going a 1,000 miles an hour on the left side. 537 00:27:14,980 --> 00:27:16,914 What is this, Australia? 538 00:27:16,949 --> 00:27:18,974 - Are you okay? - Yes, I'm okay. My neck hurts. 539 00:27:19,017 --> 00:27:21,781 This is a Cadillac, a CTS, a brand new car. 540 00:27:21,820 --> 00:27:24,084 You're trying to sabotage the event, aren't you? 541 00:27:24,122 --> 00:27:26,283 - By the way, thanks for inviting us. - Freak you! 542 00:27:26,325 --> 00:27:28,589 - Freak you! - Freak you! 543 00:27:30,429 --> 00:27:34,866 But this won't work now the way it once did 544 00:27:34,900 --> 00:27:40,236 And I won't keep it up, even though I would love to 545 00:27:40,272 --> 00:27:44,936 Once I know who I'm not, then I'll know who I am 546 00:27:44,977 --> 00:27:47,207 But I know I won't keep on 547 00:27:47,245 --> 00:27:50,772 Playing the victim. 548 00:28:03,128 --> 00:28:05,358 Thank you so much. Under the circumstances... 549 00:28:05,397 --> 00:28:07,388 Mindy Reiser's been snubbing me all night. 550 00:28:07,432 --> 00:28:10,094 - She has? - She won't even look at me. 551 00:28:10,135 --> 00:28:12,467 - Because of the Martin Short thing? - Yeah. 552 00:28:12,504 --> 00:28:16,270 I turned it around, and then I do it again. 553 00:28:16,308 --> 00:28:19,744 I think we have one song left that was specially requested. 554 00:28:19,778 --> 00:28:21,746 It's called "You Oughta Know." 555 00:28:21,780 --> 00:28:23,771 It goes something like this. 556 00:28:28,887 --> 00:28:34,587 I want you to know 557 00:28:34,626 --> 00:28:39,120 That I'm happy for you... 558 00:28:41,199 --> 00:28:44,635 Excuse me, sir. Excuse me. 559 00:28:44,669 --> 00:28:48,696 The best for you both... 560 00:28:48,740 --> 00:28:50,901 I know who this song is about.